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Original poster

Suddenly no one will talk to me

101 replies

Realitea · 08/08/2015 08:30

I live in a tiny close knit town. Great if you like a sense of community but not great when someone turns against you.
Suddenly everyone in my local shop aren't talking to me. They look away if I see them in the street whereas we used to talk.
I know I should rise above it and I'm a real wimp when it comes to confrontation.
I overheard one lady in the shop yesterday say something about me when she thought I'd left (but I was actually loitering around the exit!)
I couldn't quite make out what she said.
This is driving me nuts now. I feel like I can't go there anymore.
How does this happen with adults?

OP posts:
Vatersay · 09/08/2015 20:15

Those events are all open to interpretation Hellion but it's irrelevant in this case, the OP didn't refer to any of those in her tweet, she said that the lady concerned was, "miserable" - that's an opinion.

SuperFlyHigh · 09/08/2015 21:10

Vatersay if I were the shop assistant I wouldn't much like a random stranger describe me on twitter as 'miserable' whether I was or not. she could have had a bad day (the SA), bad month, year etc… life not be 100% roses for her right now. and maybe her colleagues and boss are cutting her some slack for this.

Hellionandfriends · 09/08/2015 21:43

Or alternatively the shop workers a bully and the other workers are laying low so not to get it in the neck too

SuperFlyHigh · 09/08/2015 21:46

Hellion what you say could be true.

I still don't think (this must be my 3rd time saying it now!) that OP should've resorted to social media to in effect bitch about this shop assistant though.

If she'd posted something like 'she's rude, she gave me wrong change 3rd time in a row' they're opinions but at least they're not full on slights on someone's character like miserable is. I wouldn't like to be told I was miserable on social media if I worked in a shop!

Hellionandfriends · 09/08/2015 22:57

Yes I'm Sure the best way would have been to speak to the manager. However, it sounds like OP just added her brief comment in passing

QuintShhhhhh · 09/08/2015 23:03

No, keep tweeting after each miserable visit.

QuintShhhhhh · 09/08/2015 23:05

Like "before there was only one rude sourpuss at Tinco foods, now theres 5! think I may go to the competition"

Or something

Aussiemum78 · 09/08/2015 23:13

You have nothing to apologies for.

The staff are being ridiculous. When you get a customer complaint, you don't sulk and strop - you attempt to fix it. What children.

Take your business elsewhere.

Vatersay · 10/08/2015 00:41

SuperFlyHigh I completely agree.

Atenco · 10/08/2015 03:31

I wouldn't like to be told I was miserable on social media if I worked in a shop!

I'm sure nobody ever called me miserable when I worked in a shop because I like people.

Of course I do find that the problem is usually at the top of any organisation, when there is decent management, you usually get pleasant service all the way down.

Babalusca · 10/08/2015 04:42

If you are in a job serving the public and do not want to be called miserable on social media then do not be a miserable, childish idiot towards customers. The offended customer is not under any obligation to discuss things with you or the manager first before shaming you publicly for your behaviour.

I am in no doubt that this staff behaviour have been complained about before and yet she continues with impunity. Complaining to the manager would have been a waste of time as the manager cannot be unaware of this woman's attitude towards customers.

Good on you. More people should stand up against poor service no matter where, village or city.

SuperFlyHigh · 10/08/2015 12:15

Baba I take it you've never worked in a customer serving role then?!

My last role was legal sec/receptionist for a small solicitors. Generally I was polite, cheerful etc to all members of the public. very very occasionally if I was not feeling well or if someone was rude to me (you'd be surprised by how many random people can scream/shout at you, be rude to you etc just because you're the first person they see or speak to) I could be considered to look a bit miserable.

Like I say though I was generally 'good with customers'.

I still stand by what I say - there are proper procedures in place to complain about customer services not social media griping which is bound to get someone's back up and will get back to them second hand.

In the solicitors where I worked if they wanted to complain (not about me generally!) we had a Complaints Manager who clients could speak to, write or email and then they could have a meeting. This is the correct procedure in business generally or to speak to a manager or Head Office. HO or the manager can then go down any HR route they think necessary with the shop assistant.

Vatersay · 10/08/2015 12:25

The fact that none of the staff in the shop are 'speaking' to the OP would tend to indicate that they don't think she has a reasonable point.

SuperFlyHigh · 10/08/2015 12:27

Of course Vatersay.

I don't doubt the SA in this case is hard work, rude etc but like I said before there could be reasons for it, she could be being disciplined right now… but it's not for the OP to butt in and comment even though it was 'miserable'.

Hellionandfriends · 10/08/2015 13:57

I think its fine to briefly pass comment, agreeing with someone in a conversation or on twitter or on FB

Babalusca · 10/08/2015 15:04

No customer is bound by any company's non-legally binding procedure or idea of what would be nice for a customer to do when they are horribly treated.

OP you did nothing wrong and you are under no obligation to kow tow to any company or person dishing out horrendous customer service. If you receive poor customer service, you are entirely in your rights to resort to social media. If the company does not like it, tough. They will learn quickly that way to improve their staff behaviour. Hit them where it hurts. Reputational regulation counts for a whole lot.

Bravo OP.

Gottagetmoving · 10/08/2015 15:39

Vatersay that's what I was getting at - news travels fast and you don't want to be known as the person who complained on social media

If I was speaking a fact, itwould not bother me at all to be known as the person who complained on social media. In fact I would be disappointed if they didn't know it was me. I would probably have commented to the staff in person already though, but either way,...not arsed.Grin

Gottagetmoving · 10/08/2015 15:42

Saying the woman was miserable related to how she was in her role on that or days in general. It's not an opinion, it's how the woman was with a customer.

Babalusca · 10/08/2015 15:59

Gotta, I too would have complained to the manager and then pronto pronto go to social media and do the same.

Any business that offer poor customer service AND has the AUDACITY to expect the customer to treat them with deference must exist in cuckoo land. The OP has been very restrained in her FB comment.

Gottagetmoving · 10/08/2015 16:04

Babalusca exactly,...The staff are paid to serve and be pleasant,..even if the customer is rude, which some are. As for not speaking to OP,..tthey should be sacked for that! They are too immature to have a customer service job.

I can't believe employed adults could be so pathetic.

Atenco · 10/08/2015 16:23

No customer is bound by any company's non-legally binding procedure or idea of what would be nice for a customer to do when they are horribly treated
^
This

Proper procedure my arse. The reason for the procedure you describe is to avoid embarrassment for the company, not to protect the customer or the employee.

SuperFlyHigh · 10/08/2015 16:29

I suppose what I am saying here is if you're in a small town/village whatever you have to be more careful (well I would) re criticism as yes, they are small places, news/gossip travels fast.

all very well if you can take the hard stares, being ignored but if you can't then at least complain properly like I said to the manager. if it hadn't been acted on by the manager THEN take to social media.

Baba I thought it was tweeting? Now it's FB.

Vatersay · 10/08/2015 19:40

For those of you saying that the OP can say what she likes on Twitter about the customer service - yes of course she can.

For those saying that the shop staff should give good customer service, yes if course they should.

For those saying the OP doesn't have to follow complaints procedure - that's true too.

However, what is also true is that there are consequences to ones actions.

The OP is currently suffering those consequences.

She readily admits she shys away from confrontation except on Twitter and is upset that people who she previously chatted easily with are now apparently angry with her/hurt by her actions.

The OP isn't necessarily wrong but given that the potential consequences to her actions were entirely foreseeable I would still maintain that they were ill advised at very least.

I live in a fairly small place, she'd be talk of the wash house here, for a while at least.

SuperFlyHigh · 10/08/2015 21:32

Vatersay exactly - consequences to her actions… which is why she's here now bleating that no-one will speak to her.

I don't live in a small place but if I for example berated the local shops where I work and live (work is one street) I'd expect it to get back to me and be frozen out (not quite the right word).

OP quite clearly says in her opening post:-

I live in a tiny close knit town. Great if you like a sense of community but not great when someone turns against you.

and it's now getting really boring as OP seems to have left. I'm sure she's found somewhere else to buy her milk with less miserable employees and instead ones willing to bow and scrape to her with a winning smile. Grin

Atenco · 10/08/2015 21:49

For those saying the OP doesn't have to follow complaints procedure - that's true too.

However, what is also true is that there are consequences to ones actions.

You have a point, but I can't see how complaining to the management about a particular shop assistant would have gone down too well either, if a couple of words on twitter that didn't even name anyone have caused this furore.