I need to start by saying that I 100% trust my DH, so my relationship with him is not in question here. He has been an idiot, but I trust that he is telling me the truth. He is a good husband and a brilliant father.
DH has an ex girlfriend who has for the last two years been very present, and I have had enough! Despite the fact that she is married and has a child the same age as mine, she still seems to have an unhealthy interest in my DH. Ever since my DD was born two years ago, she has been texting my DH, private messaging him and asking to meet up with him. Those things bother me less than the fact that whenever my DH puts pictures of DD or anything relating to our lives (holiday pics, new house- basically anything involving me!) on facebook, she always leaves rude, passive aggressive comments, to the extent where I have frequently had other people ask me who on earth she is and why she is so rude. DH knows that this annoys me, but until now we've basically just humoured her and never respond to the comments. I had assumed that this meant that he also never responds to the texts and private messages etc- but I found out on Saturday that isn't the case, and that he does speak to her fairly frequently. After a particularly nasty comment that she wrote on FB last week, DH deleted and blocked her (without telling me), which prompted a very cryptic text message from her which I happened to see. I ended up having a row with DH about it, and demanded to know what her game is and what is going on. This is when I found out that they do speak regularly, but he says this is only because he feels sorry for her because she is unhappy. I also found out that when he was away on business last year (near where she lives), they met up for dinner. I am of course, not at all happy about this, and he realises that he has been an idiot and should have left her well alone, but I honestly do trust him when he says that absolutely nothing happened and that it was just dinner. (Not that it is okay, because it absolutely isn't, and he has a LOT of grovelling to do before I accept his apology.)
Anyway, it is pretty apparent that she is interested in him. I am so angry about the whole situation, I am not happy with DH because I think that by continuing to speak to her (and meeting up with her), he has been encouraging her behaviour, but I am also angry with her that she has the audacity to be so blatant about her interest in potentially breaking up my marriage.
My question is, what do I do, if anything? DH has promised never to speak to her again, and has deleted her from his life (well so he says, but I do trust that he is telling the truth, he is a kind, usually honest man, I think this whole situation has just sort of run away with him?). However, I am not happy that she thinks she has got away with this. I am contemplating sending her a message just asking her to please leave him alone? Is this a totally bad idea? The trouble is, DH is a really soft, gentle man, and he doesn't have an ounce of fire in him, which I think that she knows, so I don't trust that she will listen to him now that he has said that enough is enough?
Argh, i'm so angry and confused by the whole thing.