I need some advice and any experience would be welcome please. I have nc as a precaution.
DD is almost 7. Her father has never lived with us and we split after he cheated. We had a 4 year relationship which ended when DD was 22 months.
Ex retired from his UK career a few (4) years ago and since then has worked in Oman. He has not seen DD for 3 years and hasn't even spoken to her since then and he hadn't seen or spoken to her for almost 18 months prior to that. So as you can see, DD doesn't really know him, though she does tell me she loves him and draws pictures of him with us in a family scene! I don't bad mouth him to her or in front of her and of course, she doesn't know my feelings about him and she's never asked.
Anyway! Ex in the past, has by email asked me about DD visiting him in Oman (with me), but he did not even mention my eldest child, not that that is relevant really. I ignored that question and he hadn't brought it up again until now. Here's a C&P of the last line of his email: "Take care and tell DD i love her. Id like you to consider letting her come over here for a visit...."
My reply to that was "To be honest, I'm not convinced that visiting you over there is the best idea, but I will give it some thought."
His answer to that came to me yesterday: "Why is it that visiting me over here wouldnt be a good idea? And for who? The opportunity to see a new place, culture, people, different place (s) different things.......It may be that she could actually like to see these things."
The entire email came across as angry and rather 'in my face' and as yet, I haven't replied.
I'm sure some of you will think me a paranoid and selfish person, but after what he did and how he did it, he is not the person I thought he was and if you ask me if I trust him, the answer is no I don't; I doubt I'd even trust him to visit her without me in this country for fear he'd take her away.
He is charming and manipulative and I am worried that if I go over there with DD that my rights in that country will be nil and I feel that I might well end up coming home without DD and totally against my wishes...
I'm not sure that anything anyone says will make me feel differently, but I'd welcome thoughts, experience and advice. I've never been to that part of the world, so have no first hand experience of it.
Thanks if you've got to the end....