An affair

[Mistykit]

Would you want to know if your other half had an affair?

You should tell her yes.

I don't particularly think you should expect abuse on here either, you're not married, and whether you knew he was or not, is not the point.

Many moons ago, I unwittingly became the OW. I engaged in a relationship with a man I had no idea was married. He used to come and stay at my flat 2/3 nights a week, we spent most weekends together and I never had an inkling at all.

When I found out he was married I ended it immediately. Months later she contacted me at the pub I worked at and asked me if I'd slept with her husband. I denied it thinking it was best to protect him, but then I figured he'd lied to me, he'd lied to her, and he would do it again.

I called her and told her everything. Now as far as I know they are still together and have since had a DC, but that is their choice. At least I know she knows the truth.

I'm glad you do realise you need to tell her - but don't waste time trying to psyche yourself up; you'll never feel ready. You just have to get on with it.

The affair naturally came to an end due to circumstances.

His betrayed wife obviously does want to know, having gone to all that trouble to find your email address etc. She deserves the truth.

I don't care about protecting him. He doesn't deserve that. She seems so lovely that I'm finding it incredibly difficult to tell her.

Nobody wants to know their husband is having an affair.

They deserve to know the truth though.

Are the 'friends' her friends too?

I'm guessing it was a fairly long-standing affair! When did it end?

Yes, tell her.
I was the gf of a serial cheater and 'everyone' knew about it. I was so hurt that people didn't tell me, even some friends.

I finally figured it out myself, but I wasted nearly two years on him.

No, I wouldn't want to know.

The wife has asked you, and requested an honest answer.

So it doesn't matter a flying fuck whether any of us would want to know. She does.

If I didn't want to know I would not go looking for answers. This wife is asking you. Be honest.

Agree that you should tell her

You should probably tell her - she might feel like she's going mad at the moment

Oops this is an old one, isn't it...?