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how do I find out if my DP has bugged my computer?

69 replies

rotool · 02/02/2011 04:03

Found out yesterday that DP of 9 years has been recording my incoming and out going telephone conversations by way of a radio transmitter conected to a tape recorder.
I am very upset ( hence awake at stupid O'clock ) as I have never given him any cause for concern and have never even looked at another man. He is very insecure and is very much in control, in fact I would say he is a control freak and a bit of a bully, not allowing me to join the gym " you might get your head turned" and wanting to know every detail of conversations I have with freinds/family etc. Long story.
Anyway now I have found out about the phone being taped things are starting to add up and I am wondering if he could have done the same to my lap top.

OP posts:
rotool · 02/02/2011 21:43

Hi, thanks for all your messages. I am sure I am safe.
I am going to get my computer checked and also my car for a tracker.
He has come home and says he understands how I feel but that he has done it for security reasons ( long story ) but I don't believe him. I don't trust him and hate the way he has come home almost defiant like a naughty child having got caught out.
He has asked for the device back but no way am I going to give it to him, he says it is his private property, what about my private telephone conversations!

OP posts:
CarGirl · 02/02/2011 21:49


What else does he stop you doing?

I find it shocking he won't let you join a gym.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 03/02/2011 07:31

Sorry, I had to go and collect DD from school.
Contact MNHQ to ask for the whole thing to be moved.
I really hope you've got somewhere safe to go to. It isn't sounding too good to me.

kando · 03/02/2011 09:19

For security reasons? Very "Spooks". How on earth did he get hold of all these devices? This is sounding more bizarre (not to mention paranoid on your p's part) by each post. Sorry, I know that's not very helpful to you Rotool - I am concerned about how weird his behaviour is, and worried for you Sad

RamblingRosa · 03/02/2011 09:20

He doesn't let you join a gym.
He's jealous and possessive.
He uses surveillance technology to bug you and spy on you.
He's controlling.
He's not even contrite when you catch him out.

I wouldn't stay for a minute longer.

PfftTheMagicDragon · 03/02/2011 09:35

wannaBe is right - you need to get yourself to a library and change all of your passwords to start with.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 03/02/2011 10:34

How are things today? I am very concerned.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 03/02/2011 13:13

Worried bump.

Tiredtrout · 03/02/2011 20:23

Please go to the police. This comes under the harassment act. They will be able to check out the other bits like your computer and car. Also your mobile can be used as a tracker. Have a look at the website for advice on non molestation orders. Keep safe x x

kreecherlivesupstairs · 04/02/2011 08:09

Very very concerned bump. What is going on?

kreecherlivesupstairs · 04/02/2011 09:39

I've now sent you a PM. Very worried, hopefully it's because you are in the middle of leaving this individual and haven't got time to make a posting.

PfftTheMagicDragon · 04/02/2011 16:04

Hope you are okay, rotool.

LoopyLoopsPoopaScoop · 04/02/2011 16:12

I hope you are OK. You know that finding key logger isn't really the point, don't you? You realise you have to leave him?

Please stay safe, and let us know how you are. :)

jaffacake79 · 04/02/2011 16:15

You let him come home?
It's illegal to tape conversations without all parties being aware of the recording.

He sounds an utter nutter!

You need to get rid of him, change all your passwords (on a safe computer!), change your mobile, change the locks, get your pc checked and have your car checked too.

I'd also be calling the local police and letting them know about your concerns. If anything else happens then they will respond quickly.

Hope you're ok!

Eglu · 04/02/2011 16:20

I hope you are no longer with him Rotool. I hope you are far away from him.

podsquash · 04/02/2011 17:49

i keep coming back to this thread hoping you are okay and wondering if there's anything i can do to help. Stay safe.

Dylthan · 04/02/2011 17:55

Really hope you are ok today x

AppleAndBlackberry · 04/02/2011 17:57

If he has installed a keylogger at any time in the past he will know all your passwords (e-mail, Mumsnet, Internet Banking etc etc) so you should change them on a friend's computer or at the library even if you can't find anything on there now.

He will probably have your credit card info stored too if you have ever done online shopping - could be an issue if you are leaving him and think he might do something malicious?

kreecherlivesupstairs · 06/02/2011 06:24

I am extremely worried about this. I have sent you a PM, please just come back and let us (me) know that you are OK.

podsquash · 06/02/2011 07:45

is there anything we can do? I mean, in rotools' absence is there anything the rest of us can do about this?

realrabbit · 06/02/2011 23:23

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 06/02/2011 23:46

Glad I am not the only person who is extremely worried about the poster.
Come back and update us. I will send you another PM, anyone else who is watching this should do the same in case mine aren't getting through for some reason [technonob]

1973magpie · 06/02/2011 23:50

Hope you're ok rotool

realrabbit · 06/02/2011 23:52

This reply has been deleted

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kreecherlivesupstairs · 07/02/2011 00:17

Good idea realrabbit. I am out of the running, I am across the channel.

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