Having a quandary. Ex bf's fathers funeral today. Was very close to both his parents when we dated (about 24 years ago) and used to see both of them about regularly after we split up. Went to his mother's funeral 13 years ago and was completely embarrassed to be scooped up by his family and welcomed as if I were a long lost relative. They insisted I go back to the wake as deceased loved me like a daughter and would have wanted me to. Felt very uncomfortable as ex's new gf was there and more or less ignored by all. I did speak to her and she was lovely about it but it didnt feel right to me.
She is now married to ex, they have kids etc. It was her who contacted me to inform me her FIL had passed away (on friday afternoon). I emailed her back to say sorry and said I would like to attend the church service but didn't want to impose. She emailed back with details of church and crem times.
I have spoken to a couple of people who have differing views as to whether I should go. There is no danger I will be dragged back to the wake as I am older and wiser but I feel I should perhaps let them grieve without the ghost of an ex being in the background. On the flip side his wife didnt have to let me know.
Help? Funeral in two hours?!