Richard Armitage Anonymous

[Fettle]

Over here ladies!

Hello PrairieOyster.

Yes, the Academy of Advanced Armitage Studies has been rather busy. We're going to apply for a research grant, doncha know.

I'm assuming that Monday will be Lucas' last appearance in Spooks but I should have learnt by now to stop assuming anything about Spooks. There are always plenty of clips on YT for those enrolled in the MA course in Applied Russian Tattoo-ology.

Now I have a difficult decision to make. I have about an hour's ironing to do and need something to help pass the time. So, Robin Hood, North and South or Clarissa? (And bear in mind that, sadly, the local burns unit is likely to be busy enough today without me doing myself a mischief while dashing away with the smoothing iron).

To whom it may concern: worry not, I gave up on the barge scenario and listened to some Sinatra instead--

That Guy sly come-hither stare
That strips my conscience bare
It's witchcraft

Oooh, I heart Clapton too. One of my favourite RH momnets was when someone says
''I shot the sheriff''
and someone else retorts
''But you did not shoot the deputy''

Childish I know. I must still be in fanletter-writing Terry mode(should have been written ''Teri'' with a heart over the i, obviously)

I hope you finished the ironing without mishap, Flowers. I know we are into a bit of mild bondage, but branding is a step too far

Well, what an eventful day I've had.

After Robert Lovelace had me insensible over the ironing board, I went to the poetry library (where we spend every Saturday afternoon, naturally) and read a beautiful illustrated Lady of Shalott. I have also filed away a poem which I may bring out on Monday, dependent on circumstances.

I haven't got to the "I shot the sheriff" bit in RH but I would find it funny too. I am besotted with Francis Albert Sinatra and was devastated when he died. I only survived my imprisonment in hospital after dd's birth by listening to Songs For Swinging Lovers on a loop. And until he was usurped by Mr Thornton, my favourite iron-along-to dvd was Pal Joey. Yet again, it's all about The Voice.

''I am besotted with Francis Albert Sinatra''

So that's another taste we have in common. Rerhaps I wouldn't quite say 'besotted' myself, maybe a one notch under that. His phrasing has me in awe. Funny how they used to call him ''Old Blue Eyes', as well as 'The Voice'.

Tonight was RH night here so I am able to give an up to date report on Gizzy. Back on the Clapton kick, ''he looked wonderful tonight''. But his snog count was zero. He didn't get lucky at all, not even a single case of kissus interruptus

However, he did get down on his knees and propose. The look of desperation in his eyes when she didn't accept was heart-rending. I must take my hat off to RA, it was so well done, just the mere upward flick of the baby blues. But oh!

Enuff of that, for anyone in need of a bit of Saturday fun, a very old favourite of mine that I unearthed from the depths of the YT basement. The lyrics are apt But it does need a touch of mental Photoshop for true perfection

The besottment (besottal?) is purely musical, I must stress. The voice, the phrasing and the conveying of emotion is what it's all about for me. I have an embarrassingly large section of my cd collection devoted to him and was a few years ago chatted up over the cds in HMV by a very personable young man who wanted to grab a granny discuss the merits of the Capitol recordings.

I can't get that clip to play but can see its title. It's not going to be a gratuitous speedo shot, is it?

And I devoted some more time, while in the poetry library, to developing the screenplay for My Bad Boy Byron. In this next scene, Byron is composing The Dying Gladiator. He is, as I visualise him, very much a Method Poet and so, in order better to capture the thoughts and the very essence of the gladiator, he dresses as a Roman centurion in a gleaming breastplate and leather miniskirt. He has Very Fine Legs Indeed. (And being of equestrian rank, he rides around a bit on a noble steed, which creates a job for you in the horse-poo shovelling department, if you're still interested).

Oh poor Guy. So unlucky in love. We must start work on that thesis. The word transgression must appear in it somewhere.

Hee, I'm a huge Frank fan, too! Have virtually every one of his CDs ever released! Have a very lovely signed photo as well. Not a Clapton girl though, so you're on your own there :)

BB's dirty secret - I've not seen RH! I watched a few eps at the time they were on because "oh look it's that bloke I vaguely fancy" but I didn't stick with it. Not sure when I will get to see it now - can't possibly watch/order/request Santa for any more RA or MrB will probably get mightly fed up :o Anyway, it's Lucas all the way for me :)

with an appropriate song, perhaps?

Boden - have you tried the library for a guilt-free RH fix? We didn't watch RH at the time (it was never on my radar) but, then, it took me until this year to watch North and South. And yet, I've watched Spooks from the start, and have never felt even the tiniest frisson for Lucas. I do, though, think he is far more interesting as a character than his two weedy predecessors.

What a shame the clip didn't play. It was an old Levi's ad, the guy in the jeans diving into pools one after the other.
Here are the rather nice lyrics:

Mad about the boy
I know it's stupid to be mad about the boy
I'm so ashamed of it but must admit the sleepless nights I've had
About the boy

On the silverscreen
He melts my foolish heart in every single scene
Although I'm quite aware that here and there are traces of the cad
About the boy

Lord knows I'm not a fool girl
I really shouldn't care
Lord knows I'm not a school girl
In the fury of her first affair

Will it ever cloy
This odd diversity of misery and joy
I'm feeling quite insane and young again
And all because I'm mad about the boy

So if I could employ
A little magic that will finally destroy
This dream that pains me and enchains me
But I can't because I'm mad...
I'm mad about the boy

Listen, they're playing my song

I shall be thinking about the Guy thesis. With maybe the word mitigation in there as well. He did a horse-riding bit too.

Ah. It's playing now. I had Clarissa running in another window - maybe they somehow stalled each other? And dear, dear Noel.

My turn to have a non-playing clip. Flowers. I am playing the beg/fetch one as compensation

Back to Bad Boy Byron I do hope you won't condemn him to baked bin tin armour for his centurion outfit, because he'd just look silly, however nice his miniskirt was.

Definite no to baked bean tin armour. This will be historically authentic and I will take great care that it is perfectly moulded to his impressive chest.

You should have got FAS singing 'I've got you under my skin', so a similar theme to Ms Washington. But Obsession fits the theme too.

I'm worrying about Monday. If anything, err, terminal happens to Lucas, do you think we should set up a stall offering tea and cake to the distressed?

Flowers, library is a good idea, but it will still be RA On My Telly :)

You need cornishpasty's links in her post of 21 Oct here, Theresa.

Well, it says here that he has read Lords of the North. Have you tried the BBC Shop? I could have looked for you last week, while dd was checking out the Doctor Who and I was not buying Sparkhouse.

Are you sitting comfortably? .

I am trying to be philosophical about Monday. After all, poor Guy has already bought it so I am used to a bit of death and destruction.

Maybe we should have our resident scientist on had too, to administer hot sweet tea and tell them that Linear Time is an illusion, so Lucas is just alive and dead at different points of the wheel.

Alternatively there is the multiple universe theory, that says anything that can happen, does happen, and each event splits off a new timeline. So Lucas dies in some universes, but survives in others.

Failing that, it might all be a dream and he appears in the shower, not ever gaving gone bad in the first place.

Yeah but, Boden, don't you get any solo TV-watching time? I must remember that not everyone is as fortunate as I.

Don't lay the six second thing on me again, Flowers, it'll be another bad night for pore Teri the fangirl. Talk about
This dream that pains me and enchains me :)

But I'll forgive you becuase of the Clarissa.
The LOTN thing on Amazon is weird, as it does come up when you search for RA items. Will do as you say and check out the Beeb shop.

Coincidentally, I was just watching Guy's demise on YT. I decided it was an acceptable thing to do as it's not as if it was ever likely to have been a great surprise. And his face after RH has closed his eyes is beatific.

If Fettle is back with us on Monday then perhaps she could dispense the theoretical physics?

And I've been thinking, too, Theresa, about that very powerful scene with Mr Thornton you wrote for me. It really was very beautiful and I am most, most grateful. If MrsLN does not develop writer's block before she writes my scene with Mr Thornton in my artist's studio, I really will be doubly blessed.

But, Theresa, you have a choice about whether to open that link or not, knowing what it contains. Don't pretend you don't.

Mind you, there's a lot of bizarre stuff which comes up on Amazon if you use Mr Armitage's name as a search term. Just as, if you search Google images for North and South + Thornton you get some images which were definitely not in North and South.

Another thing about Guy's demise is as he's a fictional character, anything that happens to him is a matter of opinion. I can always postulate that as 12th century medical knowledge was pretty basic, he might still have been alive and could be spirited away and made all better. Buit of course he'd have to be dead by now,
Unless he was abducted by aliens and put in a fast travelling space ship so that time dilation occured . So 850 years go by on Earth but he ages only 5. Einstein said so.

Of course Fettle would have the last word on this. I only read pop science books

I like the time dilation idea. It would also explain why Mr Thornton looks so scrummy even though he is 190.

I don't even read pop science books. I read reviews of pop science books and then ask a chum who's a theoretical physicist.

''But, Theresa, you have a choice about whether to open that link''

I might do, but not Teri the Fangirl. She just has no will-power whatsoever.

Re searching for RA, it complicates matters that there are two of them. You can get quite a nasty shock sometimes.

I am glad you liked the little Thornton divertissement I did for you. I would quite like to concoct a similar one for myself,but Guy won't play ball.

Aha, all has become clear re TOTN. The one read by RA is the unabridged version. You can just see the label on the RA Online site
Golly that will cost a bomb :(

But 10 CDs of The Voice!!!!!!

I've just had an awful shock, so much so that I may need a draught of Polish Cordial and the sensation of Mr Thornton's hot breath on my neck to steady my nerves. The final scene of North and South which I've saved to my favourites had been taken down by YT because of copyright issues. Luckily I found another version, but what if that goes too?

I am very fond of that divertissement. I learned a lot from it.

And so to bed.

You will still have the full DVD version, Flowers, Fear not!!!