I'm on a cruise ship going round Iceland AMA

[Imdunfer]

As title and we have a day at sea tomorrow so I'll be around to answer.

The evening show starts soon so you might not get a quick answer tonight.

Which ship are you on? I’m going on the Balmoral later on this year. I didn’t know you had to pay for WiFi . Don’t remember paying for it ever but perhaps I’m wrong.

She’s on Bolette. Depends where you’re cruising, you may be able to pick up shore signal, ship WiFi is about £8 a day but cheaper per day if you buy blocks of days.

My tech support said the cheapest way was to buy it by the day. He might be talking through his backside though.

They have to get it via satellite, it costs them a lot so they charge for it. Quite a few people seem to be using it as an escape from constant contact. Very little facetime stuff going on on board, it's great.

Are you staying near the coast? The 5g signal anywhere in sight of the coast is excellent.

Cheese!

The entertainment so far has been west end standard. We are used to Warner and this knocks that into a cocked hat.

What's it like working on a cruise ship?

Please pardon my language but I don't give a fuck what he thinks of me, he's a vile old man with no manners at all to wear what he is wearing in front of women. Everyone around him is averting their eyes.

I'm sort of half way between guest and crew. You know the people who do the wildlife, the guest speakers, the dance instructors, the craft people, the bridge instructors - I'm one of those, providing enrichment activities for the passengers. We are not paid, but get a free cruise and get to bring a plus one. I am allocated a standard guest cabin, usually one that is harder to sell because it has a restricted view, or small portholes rather than a large window. I provide my services on a sea day. On port days I can escort one of the shore tours at no cost if I wish to do so (which I usually do). The only other restriction is that we are not allocated a table in the main dining room, we have to eat at the buffet, or Poolside, or can book into speciality dining if we wish. The onboard team are lovely, everyone from the AV guys to the office staff who produce the Daily Times have all been very welcoming and friendly.

I'm surprised boarding at Liverpool was a nightmare, it ran very smoothly and quickly both times I checked in, but I can imagine it would be warm.

He’s wearing Speedo swimming trunks, from what you’ve said. You may not like his body, but they’re pretty standard male swimwear.

He's wearing an almost thong, I made that very clear in my post.

Your disgust at this elderly man’s body was what was perfectly clear. Given that this is on a cruise ship where people are sunbathing and in and out of the pool, and he’s not contravening the swimwear policy of the ship, or wearing an ‘almost thong’ to formal dinners, I don’t think he’s failing in ‘manners’.

@LaliqueSaltGrinder hiw did you find the role for ou do? Is it through the cruise line or an agency?
Sorry to hijack your thread @Imdunfer I love Fred cruises. What do you think of the shows we were on a Fred cruise recently and the entertainment crew were very new. Make sure you go the crew night show and for the final night sit downstairs in Neptune. Send my regards to captain Paolo!

It's through an agency. I am not sure how it works with other "experts". The agency sends out a list of cruises they are looking for people, I say that I could do X on Y cruise and they say yay or nay. Fred is very much destination specific - so on an Iceland cruise they'd be looking for people who were experts on Vikings, volcanoes, arctic wildlife as well as the dance hosts and bridge instructors. Other cruise lines are less specific. I have only ever worked on Fred though.

I'm intrigued @LaliqueSaltGrinder - I do hope the entertainers get paid properly? Especially if the shows are West End quality.

I would imagine they do - they are on different contracts and stay with the ship for months at a time. I'm only there for 5, 7, 10 days at a time.

I'm pretty sure they do. We chatted to the cabin service staff this morning, one from Thailand one from India. They both said that they had worked on other cruise lines and got treated and paid a lot better on Fred Olsen. Only two sharing a cabin, happy with the pay, great food, reasonable hours and a staff restaurant and bar.

I'm not thrilled that they register the ship in Nassau to give people worse than UK terms and conditions, but they were very happy about what they were being paid.

It's 10 degrees and cloudy, we are in the Arctic circle not on a beach on Majorca. People are sat around the pool in puffa jackets and wearing bobble hats.

He absolutely is failing in manners. His costume does not fit, it is tiny, as if he bought it when he was 16, it goes up the crack of his bum and in front is just a pouch in extremely flimsy material.

I am not the only person disgusted by him.

Please bear in mind that if you are sitting in jacuzzi that he gets into it's extremely difficult to avoid an eyefull of his arse or his dick and balls as he gets in and out unless you close your eyes in time.

Any reasonable man with any respect for women would wear a decent costume as everyone else using the pool facilities does.

Oh yes. Clothes were something I was going to ask about. I always overpack but what are the temperatures like on board? On shore? What will I need? I'm hoping the cabin won't be boiling as we have a window but obviously it'll be sealed.

Sheesht, good for you. But it’s the OP I’d be taking with me to a party!

I’d like to know this! Do you have to dress up for dinner? Is it mostly pleasure cruise, mostly focused on the nature or a bit of both? How expert are the experts?

So avoid the jacuzzi if you can’t handle seeing an elderly man in an ill-fitting swimming costume?

It's nice how the underwater sounds from the ship running will have been detrimental to the whales lives, how the bilge and oil and waste left behind will sully the waters, killing and damaging everything there. But you saw their water spouts as they gtfo! Phew.

It's nice how you confirm that it's mostly ignorant boomers who are aboard. That does give hope, their travel habits might die out with them.

Not hijacking the OP's thread... sorry @Imdunfer

Aircon in the cabins, some do have doors which can open. I am not allocated those as they are more expensive. I like it cool for sleeping and never had an issue. Around the ship is average indoors temperature, people wear ordinary indoors clothes.

Fred is a more formal/traditional cruise line and will not let you into the buffet in swimwear at any time. In the main dining room you can't wear shorts in the evening but you can in the buffet. Formal nights are different, again anything goes in the buffet, in the main dining room you see everything from dinner suits and ball gowns to trousers and sparkly tops or smart dresses.

On both cruises I have worked on there were people from the ORCA charity who led whale watching on deck and gave presentations. Very knowledgeable. On the first there was a geologist who spoke about things like volcanos and glaciation - not my thing, but she was very competent and knew her stuff. But if you don't fancy watching the lecture there is other stuff going on like cookery demos, knitting groups, bridge sessions, craft classes - or you can just sit in the lounge with a coffee and watch the scenery.

So instead of one man behaving in a civilised fashion any number of women and probably even a few men should avoid the jacuzzi and the entire pool area and level 8 bar, and go down a floor, along and back up again to get into the restaurant by the back entrance instead of having to see him.

He's an entitled twat strutting around if he's 20 and proud of his pouchful. It's big, I'll give him that. It's very strange to see entitled twats of men defended on this forum.

No worries, it's all interesting 🙂