I come from a gypsy / travelling family AMA

[TowerTumble]

I have name changed for this. I see so much misconception and ignorance around the travelling community and towards families like mine. I've started an AMA so if you have any questions to try and stop this misconception I'll answer everything I can!

I'm not the OP, and I'm not a Traveller, but I would always know a Traveller when I meet one.

I agree. ANYone knocking on peoples door, randomly and univited is harrassment! And some people on Mumsnet have the nerve to take the piss out of people who don't answer the door unless they are expecting someone!

If you are not expecting anyone, what is wrong with not answering the door? It always baffles me that some posters seem to get angry that other posters don't usually answer the door if they are not expecting anyone!

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It is when they won’t take no for an answer.

That was also my understanding until the day I had a Scottish Traveller girl screaming at a Romany that only she (the Scottish Traveller) was a 'real gypsy'.

Agreed. Though as some people in the UK seem totally unable to distinguish Irish people in general from Travellers of Irish descent, it possibly explains elements of the entrenched prejudice.

Why do many travellers speak with a strong Irish accent, despite living in UK for their whole lives?

My husband and many of his cousins are born to Irish parents and live in UK, but none have an Irish accent. Conversely friends of ours have moved to Ireland and the children quickly developed an Irish accent despite neither of their parents having one. So it feels like accents relate much more to where you live than how your parents speak, so am intrigued why many travellers maintain the Irish accent in a strong way despite being born in and living in uk, going to school with children without an Irish accent etc? Is it to try to maintain cultural roots?

Why do you turn up, create a huge mess then leave all your shit (literally) and rubbish behind when you move on and expect the local council to pay for this?

That was kind of my point. If they are so easy to recognise, why are there always such an overwhelming number of bad stories about them rather than good on threads like this? If it really is just a few bad apples that would be shunned in lots of traveller communities? Perhaps I'm a bit jaded by the behaviour of the settled travellers living near us. Public, council funded amenity that cost £10ks to create has been out of action for over two years due to neighbouring travellers making it purposely dangerous as they didn't like it. Scheduled roadworks being postponed after day one due to the threats to workers. They couldn't continue until police presence was arranged. I find it hard to believe I would never be held accountable for these things if I was responsible but council just shrug and say it's a difficult issue to resolve. Well yeah, it is if no one's tries to resolve it.

@TowerTumble

I've got traveller ancestry but for some reason my nan kept her grandparents heritage a secret but I came across links when I was doing the family tree.
I'm rather proud of it .

My local gym have had to do this… because one would get membership and then open the emergency exit and allow everyone in.

all pubs and cafes in my local area close on the days on traveller funerals. Too many have received too much damage. I know that may seem racist but it tough times landlords and owners can’t afford it.

i was once called racist by a colleague when I expressed concern about a traveller funeral near the school we were at. Once the police were called and we had to lock down the children she didn’t say much.

the most awful and heartbreaking case recently was a traveller who went through a red light and smashed into a car killing one and injuring another. Instead of having any remorse he called friends and family and a swarm appeared at the crash site as someone lay dying and they broke windows of the cars that had stopped to steal their dash cams. Luckily he got 11 years…. After pleading not guilty.

it’s hard not to distrust the traveller community where I live. The police are scared of them and do nothing. I don’t want to be distrustful but it’s hard

There has been anti-Irish sentiment in the UK long before travellers moved over there.

Why do the travelling community feel the need to take over certain places a few times a year on certain weekends?
For example we booked an expensive trip to alton towers 2 years ago to celebrate my daughters birthday she was turning 8 .it was what she chose to do rather than have a party
It was the first weekend of scare fest as her birthday is in october.turns out it was traveller day , police and security everywhere, girls wearing pretty much nothing with heels, men swearing and fighting in the middle of crowds of familys with little kids
This was right outside the cbeebies entrance. Lots of queue jumping and pushing and shoving
It ruined my daughters special day
Apparently it happens every year at easter and halloween and alton towers are powerless to do a thing as they cant be seen to discriminate! Their own words when we complained as did a lot of other familys
There are many reasons to see why they are not looked upon in a good light

You mentioned that in some cases there may be a pressure to be religious. Which religion do you refer to here?

okay, I'm out guys!

if people just want to come on here to beat me with a stick and use the rubbish thing as a reason to come at me, without reading any of my posts, then there's no point. I have answered this many times now. No answer I give will be good enough evidently. I do not litter or create mess. Neither does my family. Perhaps ask the people who make the mess.

have a great day all!

How much actual travelling do travelling communities do?

Thanks for all your questions guys, but I won't be coming back to the thread now

Whats the difference between you saying you don't trust the NHS and the police, and others saying they don't trust the travelling community? All those views are based on personal and community interaction, why are your views ok but others' aren't?

Great thread OP!

The traveller women I have come across (I live near a small settled traveller site) all have really long hair. As in hair to their waistline or just past their bums. And natural colours too. I rarely see the women have highlights or coloured hair.

Do you have really long hair and is this important for traveller women?

For sure, but I think a minority of people don't distinguish, and the one prejudice now feeds the other.

Hi OP, thanks for doing this - it's really interesting!
Does your culture have a class system? DP used to work on the land and there were lots of traveller lads in the same line of business and he said they were a really friendly bunch but every third bloke claimed to be related to the King of the Gypsies and he was never sure if it was a tease or not!

Why focus on that? I’ve asked other questions but they’ve been ignored.

How do you afford the huge cars and caravans?

I'm so very, very sorry OP. I was enjoying your replies and thank you for answering my two questions

I'm very sorry that the minority have ruined it for the majority of us who appreciated that you set up an AMA and wanted to engage with you to educate ourselves

Sending you love & best wishes💐

If you're settled in a house are you still classed as a traveller? <genuine question I thought traveller applied to those who live on the road>.

I don't think anyone would ever have issues with the travellers who are settled with jobs. Why would they if they are obeying laws and paying rent etc?

What do you think of the groups that turn up en masse with horses etc, camp on land without permission or without paying rent and often cause an obstruction to others, do you condem their behaviour and in your community do you discourage people from living like this and giving travellers a bad rep?

If you ever go to Swindon there are whole areas where people have accents right out of the East End of London,despite never living there. And in Corby there are places where the residents sound like they are from Glasgow. ( well they did when I lived near those places) It's like they don't mix with the original inhabitants and never change accent.