Diagnosed with ADHD as an adult, AMA

[StormySea23]

As above, just been diagnosed with ADHD as a 46 year old woman. Happy to talk about the process!

Brace yourself for idiots saying that everyone is a bit ADHD.

Hope the diagnosis is helpful

Hi OP! Me too - late 50s.

Have you tried the medication? I'm on Elvanse and it has been life-changing. My psychiatrist put me on a couple of other drugs too. Also told me to take magnesium.

Thank you and I will have no truck with that nonsense haha!

For various reasons I'm not likely to try medication, to do with other risk factors. Glad it is working for you though! Interested in the magnesium thing, is there a particular kind recommended? What does it do?

My psychiatrist told me to buy the cheapest. It helps with sleep and a few other things, which I can’t remember at the moment. She has written a blog piece about it. I’ll dig it out in a bit and post it here.

Did you go NHS, Right to Choose or private? How long did you wait?

Would be very interested to read this too, thank you!

When I started Elvanse it was amazing at helping with focus, energy and memory but it did make me realise that the ADHD was masking autism 🤦‍♀️

It's such a shame as the meds really did help with a lot of things but without my adhd distracting my brain it turns out I'm really sensitive to noise and lights and find life unbearable 😅

Me too! Recently diagnosed at 42 after experiencing a sudden onslaught of symptoms I had put down to perimenopause. So much about me makes sense now. I went private and am not trying meds as yet, as it’s just too expensive privately and my GP doesn’t do shared care. I’m hoping once the HRT kicks in that might help with some of the adhd symptoms too. I’m looking at everything from my past in such a new light now! Hope you are doing ok with it OP. My therapist tells me I may experience some grief and sadness for the younger, undiagnosed me who always struggled.

I went to my GP in March and requested a referral through Right to Choose. They referred me to ADHD360, I had to fill in a load of forms and then I got my appointment at the end of Sept. She confirmed the diagnosis on the call and then sent the document through a few days later.

AuDHD is it's own beast with it's own rules! Best of luck navigating that, there are ways and means it just takes time. I have a friend experiencing similar x

I would really like to know what symptoms you had/have, especially as a child,

And I would really like to know what the questions were that they asked you and what was the tests they did, if they did any, and how did they know if you had it.

My assessment is quite soon. What kind of things will they ask? I am a bit worried because my Mum is quite forgetful and I don't have much to do with my Dad-will they want to speak to them? I doubt they'll be helpful and may even be (unintentionally!)combative.

For example I remember being very forgetful as a child (I often did the same homework twice as I forgot I had already done it-my Mum doesn't remember this!) and my Mum also just says things like 'everyone is a bit scatterbrained!'
True perhaps, but not to the extent I am now and were then!

Why did you seek a diagnosis at this point in your life? What are you hoping for now that you have it?

As another PP says I would like go know what you were like as a child.

@StormySea23

As promised earlier, the article about magnesium by my ADHD psychiatrist. She has written lots of other good stuff on the same site. I like her article on domestic abuse too.

Magnesium Supplements in ADHD: Enhancing Treatment and Reducing Side Effects medium.com/@doctor_27995/magnesium-supplements-in-adhd-enhancing-treatment-and-reducing-side-effects-7644f5d36b06

That's a lot of questions but I'll try!

So briefly the symptoms are easily distracted, struggle with impulse control (eg interrupting in meetings) massive procrastination, good at the 'fun' bits of work but struggle with the admin - it gets done but painfully! Struggle with basic life admin such as booking car service, haircut etc. Often buy clothes and forget to return them. Loads more but that's most!
As a child - last minute with every bit of schoolwork. Massively underachieved based on ability. Difficulty with friendships, didn't really understand social rules. Every school report is a version of 'we know she understands the work but she never submits it on time or rushes through it doing the minimum'.

The assessment looks like basically describing the main symptoms to GP. Then had to fill in an ASRS form which you can find online. Uploaded reports from school and questionnaires from family including ideally someone who knew you as a kid. Risk assessments and health questionnaires as well.

The assessment was then 1.5 hours interview where she basically posed scenarios and had to give examples from adult life and childhood. By then I think they knew the answer but the interview part is to make sure you can back your answers!

Good luck with your assessment! They aren't trying to catch you out as such, just confirm the score from your forms. I was given scenarios eg do you lose or misplace things and she wanted at least 2 examples from adulthood and 1 from childhood.

No, you don't need anyone with you at the assessment although you can ask to have someone. My friend took her husband as he's good at remembering stuff she forgets! If you think they won't be helpful then don't ask them, just try to get some examples ideally from before 12. Do you have siblings who might be able to help?

We have the same psychiatrist. She's very good isn't she.

Because the impact is becoming more apparent. I think when I was younger I had a lot more coping mechanisms but currently I have a lot to juggle (teenage son taking GCSEs, dad in a care home with dementia, mum needing to move house) and my ability to cope is somewhat frayed. Apparently it is also quite common for impact to be increased as perimenopause kicks in.

In terms of what I hope for - some adjustments at work, fairly minor but just will make it easier to manage. Possibly some counselling either through EAP or Access to Work.

I want to have an assessment. My son was diagnosed this year, when I was in his appointment 95% of it sounded like me.

challenging things:

over thinker/mental health
high anxiety
take things personally
procrastination
lack of interest quickly
impulsive/inpatient

good things:

creative/good at problem solving
good at decision making
cab absorb stress (but can burn out)
people can become successful due to the above as will take risks
hyper focussed so can get through a lot of work and multitask

Things when I was younger made more sense that I struggled with, especially mental health. I was secretive and sometimes wanted to be a recluse, but when out you would have no idea as I masked as confident. Impulsive and built up debt as didn’t think or I suppose care of the consequences. I could be unregulated emotionally, easy to trigger into my thirties. Spiteful if felt wronged.

understanding more about ADHD has made me a better parent. I do want to go for an assessment as the reports do give good personal insight.

She is bloody amazing!

My dad's nickname for me was Dolly Daydream if that helps!

I was known for being in my own world, mostly completely buried in a book, out of step with what was going on around me. Disorganised and sometimes accused of laziness, underachieving although bright. Only really got in trouble at school for talking at the wrong time.

Fabulous thank you!

I’m due to be tested soon. I’ve been on the waiting list since 2023 but due to my suspected adhd I haven’t been able to follow up and get appointment sooner
im a lot older than you op. I feel I won’t get diagnosed because I don’t have family to ask and I also am not good at interviewing and finding examples. I’m not able to plan ahead and I’m not even able to check my diary and find out when my appointment is. Procrastination has me by the throat

I will try to buy some magnesium in the meantime