ex-rough sleeper ( female) 2 years out, 20 years in - AMA

[streetsleeper]

It was a while ago, I have been "indoors" nearly 20 years now, but some things have not changed in the experience of rough sleepers, as I know from supporting them. However, I will be answering about my own experience only.

@Fantina I was working two jobs at the time and at uni, one of the jobs with staff showers, Would have been much harder without that. Id not been able to secure anywhere to live when last tenancy ended as no guarantor and couldnt find a place that would take without one. It helped I had a Aygo so no one would ever think you could live out of it which helped me stay hidden I think. Outside Churches was always my go too, as well as laybys/country roads same as you, also where a row off houses is at the end of a long connecting road like to the moors ect. I still find it peaceful in a way, I feel sleeping safer in the car than I do in my own house still over 10 years on.

You sound amazing!
Rip to your lovely friend x

you can offer! Somebody might be grateful, or might say no, it depends on their personal circumstances.

Duvets are great in some weather, but worse than useless in others, and some people have too many, or not enough covers.

Thank you

I agree to some extent yes, if by "relationships" you include relationships with landlords! A lot of homeless people have money. A lot of homeless people have jobs, some have professional jobs- they just don't have enough money for rent.

I loved it! Other students were arriving and referring to the rooms as "prison cells" - and they were a bit basic!. I had no posters, or ornaments of any kind - I actually decorated my walls with a few sheets of cheerful colourful wrapping paper for a few pence, from the local supermarket, and added a couple of sheets of Christmas wrapping paper a few months later, alongside a life size picture of a Christmas tree I drew on green paper and cut out and stuck onto the wall. The Christmas before I had spent weeks peeking in through windows to get a glimpse of other people's Christmas trees, so this felt like a royal palace to me.

o yes, still in touch with a couple of teachers who helped me, and two school friends who's families took me in at different times - very little contact with family. I got in touch with family recently after a diagnosis of a genetic illness, but I have very few blood relatives (except my own children)and none of them live in the UK

No, I have never told them, They have all come with me to volunteer in homeless shelters, and have welcomed homeless people into our home, and one wants to work in this field, but I have never told them about my past. They just know that a couple of teachers looked after me when my mum died, nothing else - although they know the teachers well, as I am still in regular touch with them.

Gosh you got kicked out because your mum died. It’s traumatic enough losing a parent at that age - I was the same age, maybe a bit younger when my dad died.

How did you cope with all of the pain and emotions on top of everything else ? I’m just stunned you pulled things together.

Yes.

So sorry about your friend. What happened to them?

Thank you for your reply @streetsleeper it’s very touching to hear what you did to your room. One of my parents lost both parents by the time they were 17 and had to live with a stepparent. Their older siblings were shown the door but they were allowed to stay. It wasn’t the happiest of times and they didn’t have a good relationship with them but at least they had a roof over their head.

Hey OP. A great AMA. I'm sorry too about what happened to your friend.

I volunteer with an event for homeless people and the involved church has a large stone slab (nicely and professionally done!) with the names of homeless people in our town who have died. It's not prominent, you have to know it's there, but it's got a lovely little secret garden in front of it. The idea isn't to advertise but to offer a still and respectful place to be remembered.

Made me think that your friend might be due a place, maybe more prominent, to never be forgotten?

Maybe not appropriate but posted in case it helps.

streetsleeper you are very brave and I have often wondered about the future of rough sleepers I have seen so its very heart warming to hear your life turned around. It sounds like your uni application was a pivotal point and it was wonderful your teachers cared enough to help you.
I also researched streetlink after reading your post and for others interested in what it is - its a charity the public can call to connect people sleeping rough in their local communities to local support services that can help. Apparently £7 donation enables them to answer a call about someone sleeping rough.
And I have also donated after reading your post.
The service is run by the charities Homeless Link & St Mungo's.
www.streetlink.org.uk

From a histologist, I just wondered what part of NHS labs you went into. I’m so proud of you. It’s not like it’s an easy job either 😉

You are amazing ! I am in awe of your determination.
I am sorry about your friend… life is very very hard for some people.
We have sunk so low as a society when we are prepared to accept homelessness.

I wanted to say too what a lovely supportive thread with lovely posters… this post reminds me of the woman who talked about her experience of being in jail.
Why can’t all posts be as lovely and supportive and empowering 🤔

I'm a teacher and I know many who go above and beyond. I'm so glad you had the relationship with them and they were able to support you.

I know so many unsung heros. It's really lovely to hear a success story

Its lovely to see you are sharing that love with your involvement with refugees. Kindness makes the world go around

This is my favourite thread ever

I started teaching just over twenty years ago, the period you describe. I’m gobsmacked that the pastoral care didn’t step up. I’m also surprised that you were able to dry your clothes on a school radiator, apply for Uni without a home address etc. I’m so sorry this happened to you, you are obviously a very resourceful person but I’m so sorry so many people let you down when you needed them/us..