I work in a nursery... AMA

[AMANursery]

Name changed for this just because I post on local boards so don’t want this to be outing to my particular setting.

Just as background, I’ve been in the nursery world for 14 years, started as an apprentice and now a manager and done every role in between!

How would you deal with staff members who lied/gave misinformation to parents about how their child got injured at nursery?

If you know that they definitely did and have strong evidence to prove so, I would take the child out. I’d be worried if they were lying about that what else would they be lying about? A nursery is based purely on trust and once the trust goes I wouldn’t feel comfortable

What makes a good nursery in your opinion and what makes a bad nursery?

Do you have a high staff turnover? What's your opinion of a nursery with a high staff turnover

What's your thoughts on a room which has an age range of 2.5 - 5?

so happy you said you don’t dislike children. do you think that’s true of most nurseries? My son who is nearly two is at nursery and they are always - very nicely - telling me how he throws things, won’t nap, never sits still, and I’ve been really worried and upset that they hate him and dread me turning up with him in the morning.

Also is it hard work? When I stayed for a day for my son’s settling in I was exhausted just watching them!

1. you mentioned biting, especially between 18months - 2 years. How would you expect a nursery to deal with a repeat biter? Many children bitten, normally when the biter wants a toy.

This is very dependent on the age of the child. If we’re assuming the child is old enough to understand that it hurts the other child I would expect
Behaviour policy to be followed
Both parents informed
A log of the incident detailing the time of day and what was happening before and during the event
A member of staff to shadow the repeating biting child, specifically during the times of day that seem to be the time it’s occurring
Meetings with parents of the biting child to see what’s going on at home and to ensure we’re on the same page with regards to discipline
Preventing a situation by a member of staff stepping in before the child gets frustrated enough to bite
Looking at changing the child’s routine, are they tired, hungry etc
Lots of physical play for the child so they aren’t as frustrated

There is more but that’s generally what we do.
2) how many days at nursery do you think is best to get the most out of it but balance home life? Five days at nursery seems like a lot for a one year old.

I personally think Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday at nursery is the best balance. I totally understand this is not doable for everyone and absolutely no judging here but I think it gives children a good routine and a nice amount of time at home and at nursery

For a child who will be starting nursery aged one, which baby class or group would you recommend to help prepare them for nursery? I was thinking a general toddler group to get used to the hustle and bustle, but also noting what you say about communication struggles of babies 18 months- 2 years, would a baby sign language course be helpful?

How often are the children meant to have a review

Are all toddlers stubborn?

Is it better to settle in over as long a period as possible and build up adding an extra hour or two each week until you build up to the full day at nursery? Or does that confuse the child when they are there for a bit longer each time, would you say from your experience ?

Do you tell parents the honest truth about what their child has eaten? I'm told 'it was chicken casserole, potatoes and peas for lunch and she ate that really well...' However, if I probe further it turns out she flatly refused to eat that, was offered a ham sandwich as an alternative, of which she had one bite. If I didn't ask, however, I'd assume she'd had a full hot lunch. I'd rather know, and certainly wouldn't judge nursery staff for my child's ridiculously faddy eating.

Do you allow staff to bring their children to nursery? What's your policy on that?

My 1 year old is starting nursery soon but the baby room has the cots for naps in the main room in a dark corner. I'm so worried she won't sleep as atm she has a dark room and white noise on. Won't the noise and play happening keep her up? Do you think this will be a problem?

What makes a good nursery in your opinion and what makes a bad nursery?

It depends what you want from a nursery. I prefer the homely feel over a more classroom style setting. A lot of parents say they just have a good feeling when they walk into the right place. I’d be looking at staff interactions, staff ratios, standard of resources, how happy the children seem, how well the staff know the families. How the do the staff seem? Do they want to be there? Do they say hello to you are they smiley etc

The new ofsted framework focuses a lot on staff interactions and how well they know the children so I would definitely be taking ofsted reports completed after September 19 into consideration. Prior to that, it focussed a lot on paperwork so I wouldn’t be too worried if a nursery only got a ‘good’ rating.

Do you have a high staff turnover? What's your opinion of a nursery with a high staff turnover

Ours is pretty good. Average is 3 years. But a lot of staff been there over 10. The issue with nursery is it isn’t well paid and it’s a lot harder work than people expect so some start and realise it’s not for them. Also, people tend to use it as a stepping stone into further studies.
I think staff turnover is more noticeable in education because you build a rapport with the staff member and they become important to you and your child and then when they leave it can be unsettling, but you wouldn’t notice as much in, for example, a retail store. If a nursery had ridiculously high turn over I would be questioning the morale which is very important because if the environment isn’t nice for staff to be, what is it like for children?

What's your thoughts on a room which has an age range of 2.5 - 5?

It can work dependent on the layout of the rooms and structure of the day. I’d expect the ages to be separated for small parts of the day to allow the older ones to do more focussed and challenging activities

so happy you said you don’t dislike children. do you think that’s true of most nurseries? My son who is nearly two is at nursery and they are always - very nicely - telling me how he throws things, won’t nap, never sits still, and I’ve been really worried and upset that they hate him and dread me turning up with him in the morning.

Also is it hard work? When I stayed for a day for my son’s settling in I was exhausted just watching them!

I don’t believe you could work in a nursery if you didn’t like children. You certainly aren’t in it for the money and there’s quite a few downsides to the job that being with the children is definitely the main positive. Someone that didn’t like children wouldn’t last long at all.

Oh and sorry yes it is hard work!! I’m shattered at the end of a week. The staff that have it the toughest are the ones that are on the floor the majority of the time as it’s literally non stop.

For a child who will be starting nursery aged one, which baby class or group would you recommend to help prepare them for nursery? I was thinking a general toddler group to get used to the hustle and bustle, but also noting what you say about communication struggles of babies 18 months- 2 years, would a baby sign language course be helpful?

I think both of your suggestions would be helpful but also getting your little one used to you leaving would be beneficial too. Leaving them with grandparents for the afternoon or a friend for a couple of hours. It comes as less of a shock to them when it happens at nursery.

Good luck!

How often are the children meant to have a review

We do termly but every nursery has different protocols. I’d expect at least 3 a year

This has been really interesting to read, thank you! We love DS nursery, we felt better about leaving him there than with grandparents at times! Please know that youre very much appreciated and seen as an extension of family to many of the children you're caring for and their parents.

Are all toddlers stubborn?

Some more than others but I would say they all can be stubborn.

s it better to settle in over as long a period as possible and build up adding an extra hour or two each week until you build up to the full day at nursery? Or does that confuse the child when they are there for a bit longer each time, would you say from your experience ?

We alter every settling period based on the child. Some children walk straight in and don’t look back. In which case settles don’t seem necessary so we just suggest for the parent to say goodbye and pop upstairs for a tea. We do five of these all lasting 90 minutes and then on the 6th day the child usually does a half day. If we think they’re ready they will be then do a full day.
The children that are trickier to settle we encourage the parent to stay for the first day and then leave for increasing amounts of time throughout the week. Once, a parent came every single day for 6 weeks for an hour and a half. They were just as nervous as the child so it benefited both of them to be so gradual. As the weeks went on, the parent felt comfortable to leave for short amounts of time. The child cried the first few times but then got used to the fact the parent would always come back. The child now runs into nursery and doesn’t want to go home some days!

Do you tell parents the honest truth about what their child has eaten? I'm told 'it was chicken casserole, potatoes and peas for lunch and she ate that really well...' However, if I probe further it turns out she flatly refused to eat that, was offered a ham sandwich as an alternative, of which she had one bite. If I didn't ask, however, I'd assume she'd had a full hot lunch. I'd rather know, and certainly wouldn't judge nursery staff for my child's ridiculously faddy eating.

This is a tricky one as I see it from both sides. It is obviously frustrating that you’re initially not being told the truth and that shouldn’t be happening. However, lunch times are so busy in nursery. There tends to be a lot of staff turn over during these times as staff are also going on their lunch. We actually get lunch cover staff in to cover lunch breaks and they will have gone home by the time the parents pick up so if they haven’t passed on how the child’s eaten they wouldn’t be able to tell you. We deal with this by writing all/half/none next to the child’s name on the sign in sheet so parents can see. We know that some parents like to know exactly what a child has eaten so we make a conscious effort to get details about those children’s food intake. Other parents aren’t too fussed and never really ask. If I were you, I’d email or call and just mention you’re worried about how much food they’re eating and that you will be asking every day how they have eaten. This will mean the staff will be making more of an effort to remember what your child has or hasn’t eaten.

Do you allow staff to bring their children to nursery? What's your policy on that?

We do but we avoid them being in the same room as each other. If it ever causes a problem (e.g the child won’t settle, is very distressed every time they see their parent, the staff member finds it too distracting etc) we actually have another site slightly out of town that they will then send them too. We allow them to start their shifts later to accommodate travelling to and from the nursery. They also don’t have to pay fees - a bonus of the job!

My 1 year old is starting nursery soon but the baby room has the cots for naps in the main room in a dark corner. I'm so worried she won't sleep as atm she has a dark room and white noise on. Won't the noise and play happening keep her up? Do you think this will be a problem?

I totally appreciate your concerns. I’m fortunate enough to have a separate sleep room with black out blinds etc but I do see lots of nurseries with a similar set up to what you’re describing. My advice would be, that it may take a little while but your baby will get there. They get so tired at nursery, more so than they do at home so they do honestly all eventually pass out, especially the younger ones. We have lots of children who are nightmares with their naps at home but sleep well at nursery and for a longer time. One child will literally fall asleep ANYWHERE and the parents can’t believe it as they’ll only sleep on them at home. I actually took a picture of them asleep in a teepee once and sent it them as I think they struggled to believe me!

If it does create a big problem and your little one doesn’t sleep, nurseries tend to get some children to sleep in buggies if this is something that helps.

This has been really interesting to read, thank you! We love DS nursery, we felt better about leaving him there than with grandparents at times! Please know that youre very much appreciated and seen as an extension of family to many of the children you're caring for and their parents.

So glad you’ve found it interesting, what a lovely thing to say! If you haven’t already, I think it would be a lovely idea to email the nursery that feedback. We often only hear about negative things, it really does make our day when we get positive feedback! I print positive emails out and put them in the staff room for all staff to read. It’s even nicer when a member of staff is mentioned by name too, makes them feel really appreciated :)

Following on from a discussion on another thread, will your nursery wake a child up after a set period of time napping if the parents request it?

Following on from a discussion on another thread, will your nursery wake a child up after a set period of time napping if the parents request it?

Yes. We follow the child’s routine as much as we can