I have eight children

[amazinggracing]

Ask away!

how could you face pregnancy and birth so many times. Once scared me off for life

Do you think if you weren’t expecting a trust fund or inheritance , you’d have still had 8 children?

£87 a week on food for a family of 10?

I spend more than that & there’s only 3 of us, & I’m quite careful too! ( obviously not careful enough )

Do you think if you weren’t expecting a trust fund or inheritance , you’d have still had 8 children?

No, definitely not.
*
how could you face pregnancy and birth so many times. Once scared me off for life*

Pregnancy has always been a breeze for me and birth is a necessary evil.

£87 a week on food for a family of 10?

We don't shop weekly. We also don't eat meat. We buy a lot from wholesalers and get some veg from the garden. It does go over this often.

I have 2, with one of the way, and our house is a constant mess. Are you quite minimalistic? (As much as you can be with a household of 10?) or probably more organised than I am!

Op you have a trust fund and inheritance from your grandparents , which both suggest you are from ‘old money’. Are you traditionally educated? (University etc) and were your parents supportive of your choice to have so many children so young? Was there any disappointment at what you - shoulda -woulda been?

What sort of food are you buying? I fully admit that I'm extravagant and just spend £150 a week for a family of 4 but I'm struggling to see how a family of 10 manage on £350 a month. That's pretty incredible

Obviously circumstances vary hugely. But op how did you manage to save anything substantial when you’ve been at home with 8 kids and started when you were just 21? It’s an achievement!

I worked up until relatively recently and I also inherited money from my grandparents as well as a trust fund from my parents. I'm very good with money and saving.

You can't have earned very much from working if you've been pregnant, breastfeeding, & taking care of up to eight children since the age of 21.

Well there are jobs I guess where a mum can work from home and earn a fair amount in a short space of time. Maybe being a vlogger like zoella 🤔
Or stock trading or similar.
What was your job OP?
I think it’s the holy grail to be able to work from home with 8 children and still manage to save.

That's a lot of maternity leaves for your employer if you only gave up work recently! Did your colleagues openly resent you?

Are you quite minimalistic?

Yes, I would say so.

Are you traditionally educated? (University etc) and were your parents supportive of your choice to have so many children so young? Was there any disappointment at what you - shoulda -woulda been?

Yes, I went to university and got my degree. I became pregnant not too long after I graduated, in my first job post uni. They were disappointed that I got pregnant so young, but have always been supportive.

What sort of food are you buying?

All sorts, we eat lots of different things. I don't get our food from one specific place and batch cook and buy things in bulk a lot. Not eating meat (veggie for seven years) has cut costs massively. Our girls dance and have meals at the studio too - I forgot to mention that.

You can't have earned very much from working if you've been pregnant, breastfeeding, & taking care of up to eight children since the age of 21.

No, but enough to add to the money I've been lucky enough to inherit.

What was your job OP?

Web design/development. Self employed. I also did some forex trading but I was losing money too often as I didn't have the time to keep constantly checking it all of the time.

Why would that be the holy grail football? I can't see your examples of being a blogger or a home trader contributing to society in any meaningful way. I wouldn't work for the sport either if I had afuckinggoddamnedtrustfundwoopwoop no need to either.

That's a lot of maternity leaves for your employer if you only gave up work recently! Did your colleagues openly resent you?

Before I stopped work completely, I worked from home. Working for myself.

I am also one of six and loved it. I completely see how people view it as selfish, but I know it's not. We would love more, but we have stopped at 8 because that's what's best for our children. They all have their needs (and most of their wants) met.

What makes your threshold 8? As you allude most of us have a threshold of how many kids we want (or decide to stop at), some for personal reasons some for the sake of the kids. So for example for me I work outside the house, like me time, like to holiday with DH alone and want to take the kids abroad 1-2 times a year so for our circumstances and for what we earn in order for me to do this, and give them 1:1 time as well I stopped at the number I have. What would you have had to compromise at 9 which made you stop at 8, that you weren't happy to do? Hope that makes sense!

Also the homework, how do you cope with the homework?! Getting 2 kids spellings done is stressful enough for me! Can't imagine what it's like supporting 8 kids' homework.

What makes your threshold 8?

I know that we are stretched as far as we can stretch now. Nine would be selfish, I couldn't give them all what they needed. I knew that with seven, we could handle another. But I know now, we need to stop.

I wanted a big family, not necessarily this big. But before trying, every time, we'd sit down and make sure that we could cope and that our children could cope.

Also the homework, how do you cope with the homework?!

The literal bane of my life. Homework and spellings do get done, but with difficulty.

@Baguetteaboutit no I just really mean, well if you do have 8 children your options are pretty limited in terms of earning potential, because your life is only as good as your childcare options really.
So a job with few hours, mega pay, and little stress would be preferable to one that required you to find childcare for all 8 and paid minimum wage.

Oh and if you could be at home and not have to pay anyone/ micro manage childcare of course!

Good luck, OP.
And fair play for staying calm against the sceptics on here

Good luck with GCSEs, A levels and UCAS. You have some very stressful times ahead. I can't imagine having to go through the stress of public exams and university appliations eight times.

Maybe your children are too young yet for this question, but, do you have a favorite?

I only have two children who are now adults, one is in fact middle-aged, anyway, I can not 'relate' at all to one of them and the other is like my mental clone - we read each other's minds almost.

Maybe your children are too young yet for this question, but, do you have a favorite?

I don't have a favourite. It's never crossed my mind that that's something that would happen.

OP It never crossed my mind either when they were young children. Please don't me wrong, the favorite child doesn't have to be a better person, just one you are on the same wave length with.

I worked up until relatively recently and I also inherited money from my grandparents as well as a trust fund from my parents. I'm very good with money and saving.

A trust fund and inheritance-explains a lot! Am wondering where in the U.K. you live-can’t be London I take it!?

You have been very lucky, with Finances and generally happy, healthy and NT children. Very blessed. Long may that continue. Majority of the population don’t have it as lucky as you (and thankfully, on behalf of the health of the planet, not a bad thing!)

Also, if 3 of more of your children had an important event on the same day, and you obviously can only split you and your DH once, what would you do and how would you feel?

OP, do you judge those with one or two children, who struggle to manage and moan about it, ever thinking ‘well, if I can do it with 8....! Be honest with yourself now.....)