I live in Japan - Ask Me Anything

[tanitani]

Moved here two years ago to improve my language ability and be a church volunteer. (They provided my visa)
I teach English as my main job.

Thought it would be just 2 years but ten months in met my future husband and now planning to stay forever.

Not sure if any of this is interesting for people but if you have any questions go ahead!

(Also planning a wedding in another culture - fun and definitely interesting.)

just sent it - check your inbox

@TanteRose thanks! I got it.

Sounds great - if I had the chance to go to university again (dropped out) I'd love to do that.
Unfortunately found what I loved way too late to go back and start again, but will keep studying and enjoying it now. _

Hi tanitani

I would love to visit Japan with the DC at some point, do you have any recommendations on places or things to do which would be interesting for kids, which would not be the usual tourist thing?

Also, I love Japanese chiyogami paper, and imagine shops full of the stuff.... Does such a thing exist?

How do you find living in a society which is still so patriarchal?

@Fortunatelymine
I feel like the typical touristy things are so fun that I'd recommend them anyway. However there is a ninja museum in the Mie prefecture that I haven't been to but looks really fun!
I'd also recommend taking them to any arcade - they really are so fun.
What kind of things do your DC normally enjoy doing?
I'm sure there is a shop somewhere - I haven't actually seen one but haven't looked for one either. I'll ask around!

@Parthenope very good question. For me personally, I feel my "experience" has been quite protected and I haven't experienced it directly. Or haven't realised. In my job I do work with japanese people but my initial bosses are either foreign or "westernised" if you will, so I haven't had any negative experiences as a woman. However my experience like I said, is not the typical Japanese woman's experience.
When I got married (legally - ceremony is in March) and informed my work, when they were talking about promotion/the next few years I was specifically asked when I was intending to start a family, which I feel in the UK/overseas would be seen as a private/intrusive question.
I also really want to be a SAHM in the future, which is "expected" in Japan but as it was something I personally wanted, never came up as an issue. However it was definitely something HTB and I discussed together, I didn't feel it was forced on me.
The attitude to sexual harassment, or from older Japanese men is something that has concerned/upset me in the past, things I've read in the news etc.
However personally, like I said, I haven't had much direct negative experience. Day-to-day living I've felt happy/respected.

Thanks OP, the ninja Museum would ho down very well esp with my boy :)
Girl is into anime, and 'individual' fashion style, no doubt would love to see some 'fashion' out on the streets!

I miss Japan. Sigh.

Konnichiwa! Genki desu ka?

I’ve there there too, twice and agree with everything you’ve said. I found it really hard at the beginning (couldn’t work, didn’t speak the language, boyfriend (now DH) worked long hours and no money!) but learnt enough to get around and navigate phone contracts/ post office/ 7-11 and eventually loved it. Our first two children were born there and we’d love to take them all there one day. I live in a town in England now, which is frequently visited by Japanese tourists. They love it when I start chatting to them in Japanese!

I am also veggie and found it really hard to eat out. No, ham is not a vegetable. Neither are bonito flakes. Rice and soy sauce! Happy wedding ceremony. Gambatte!

And omedetou gozaimasu

My young teen really wants to do Japanese studies at uni eventually. I fully support this, but wondered if it wouldn't be very useful. I did a humanities degree which isn't proven useful so you can maybe see where I'm
coming from. It's great to read that living costs are low, so teaching English is a good option for her if the degree didn't open any doors for her. I think Japanese culture is really trendy right now for us, or maybe it's just my dd's social circle, have you noticed that increase?

What are some of the cultural differences in pregnancy and raising babies that you have noticed?

@Fortunatelymine the Ghibli museum is probably worth a visit - has lots of details and fun things about those movies. There's rumours of a full theme park being created soon so keep an eye out for that.
Any major city if you go out on a Saturday afternoon or Sunday you'll see all the teenagers out - Harajuku is a good area for that in Tokyo but it's not as much as it was years ago apparently.

@Slippersandacuppa haha yes! My HTB has learned all about it but even for him there were a few mistakes in the beginning. If someone doesn't get it he now helpfully says "she doesn't eat living things!" essentially, it's quite funny. But yes. I'm vegetarian, no I don't eat chicken, or pork, or fish. Yes I don't eat fish. Okay so I also don't eat the fish flakes - as this is fish.
That was the thing I was most surprised about - not that being vegetarian was difficult but that the concept was difficult for people to understand. However now I know the restaurants where I can eat (and enjoy!) and luckily I'm a creature of habit, so don't mind going to the same places. Thank goodness for tofu.

@slappinthebass
As someone who wasted their time at uni (dropped out) I can totally understand your concerns! I feel learning another language is so useful and does open doors for translation, interpretation, working at an embassy for example. There is the school of thought that in years to come translators will be unnecessary due to technology but to be honest I really doubt this.
I think there has been an increase! As I live in Japan I don't notice it as much but certainly even Kpop (Korean pop) and asian culture in general is on the increase. I think with apps like youtube developing, young people are hearing more and more.
You don't need Japanese to teach English but it certainly helps to know what the students are saying sometimes!
The major cities like Tokyo are still fairly expensive to live in, so I'd choose a smaller city and your living costs should be fairly okay. I come from London though, so anything is cheap after that.
Maybe talking to your teen about what kind of job they'd like to do (a boring subject at first maybe, but one I wish my parents had chatted with me about) and look specifically at what Japanese related things they can do.
Would they like to live in Japan? Most universities do a study abroad option where they can safely test it out.

Regarding pregnancy - I don't yet have DCs but I know they tend to not use any pain medication here. Generally people feel it's dangerous for the baby. Also they're a bit strict about weight gain I've heard.
Generally women do all the childcare and the man works long hours - I feel like men aren't encouraged or overly celebrated, even supported to be so hands on. My HTB definitely wants to be and we've talked about what we'd do to support that - but the long working hours often get in the way of family life.
Recently however, I feel I've noticed noises about this changing and opening up. I hope it continues to do so.

Tanitani - Hello, I'm not a fan of organised trips abroad and like to plan & book our own. I've looked at traveling to Japan for 3 weeks to one month. I don't speak Japanese. Is it easy to travel to different cities by train. I would pre-book the accommodation. Do you have any places that you would recommend as a must do - we enjoy markets, temples, museums, animals, just sit and watch the world go by. I realize that it may take a few trips to see the best. We have travelled to some other Asian countries

@Sn0wscary8
Me too - that's what I did the first few times I came, planned my own.
The first time I really didn't speak much Japanese at all, but managed it because I planned everything so well.
That said, of course it's great to take a phrase book with you for emergencies and even if you only know "arigatou gozaimasu" (thank you), Japanese people are always incredible happy and touched that you said anything at all.

I would definitely allow one or two days to enjoy Kyoto - I still need to go back. It has some beautiful shrines, I love the Arashiyama bamboo forest also. Maybe even three so you can enjoy everything rather than rush.
You may enjoy Ise Grand Shrine too - I really enjoyed it, it was beautiful and lots of street food to enjoy.
For sit and watch the world go by there is a Starbucks (bear with me) that overlooks the Shibuya crossing in Tokyo, amazing for just watching Japan "happen".
In Tokyo there are lots of themed cafes (actually everywhere but easy to find there) and the Ghibli museum if you've seen any of the movies.

For the first time, especially with the time you've suggested I would definitely fit in Tokyo (lots of different areas to enjoy although it is very busy) Kyoto, Nara (has a deer park where the deer are very used to people, you can feed them and pet them. They do sometimes bite bums I've heard but they were fine when I saw them.)
Also a wonderful village called Takayama, I've never been there but sent my parents off there on a day trip when they visited and they thought it was amazing.

Hokkaido is on my must-go list - they have a snow festival in the winter and generally looks amazing.
Kobe is also supposed to be great - it's on our short-honeymoon shortlist.

The Shinkansen is very expensive so I'd recommend looking into the Japan Rail Pass - you can use the Shinkansen loads and JR operated trains. It looks expensive at first but once you've used it just twice - it's worth it.

For fun but not so cultural trips there is USJ (universal studios Japan) and the Harry Potter area is fantastic! I loved it.

If you want to stick to a budget I recommend the Toyoko inn chain - it's kind of like Japan's Travelodge - but always very clean and comfortable.
You can also try the traditional Japanese ryokan - although I liked beds haha.

Make sure to avoid Golden Week in May - it's a long national holiday and really busy and crazy everywhere you go. Also Summer gets unbearably hot (I think they were reporting in the UK last year) so try to avoid July/August/early September if possible. However with DCs that may be difficult - July is still tolerable but my goodness August.....last year got up to 42/43 degrees daily, and it didn't go down much at night.

Reading this thread is making me want to go to Japan again. I lived in Kobe for 2 years teaching English about 15 years ago..fascinating place.

Thank you for the tips. I would love to see the snow monkeys, deer, temples, onsen, watch life go by in the cities. You have inspired me to do some more research into some indepth trip planning

@Sn0wscary8
Yes me too with the monkeys!

I hope you can come and really enjoy it, it truly is a wonderful place to visit. Of course find non-typical touristy things, but the typical touristy things are so fun I'd recommend them anyway.

Also - sushi is so cheap here, it makes me so happy.

@chocolateavocado99

Oh amazing! I hope to visit Kobe soon.

@TanteRose I misses your thread. Is it too late to ask you questions?

Hi @Italiangreyhound

this isn't my thread - you mean the one in Living Overseas years ago? Not even sure if I even started that one either LOL

But you can ask me anything if you want (or PM me)
@tanitani might be able to answer too

What's Christmas like over there? They don't celebrate it at all?

What are the main social differences you've noticed? Brits are known for their politeness etc, but I guess it differs vastly from Japan?

@tanitani oh so sorry! I got you mixed up with the OP!

I'm interested in info on Japan as planning a holiday there!

Hi, @tanitani did you get to Kyobe? Is it nice.

greyhound this is the most recent thread in Longhaul

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/longhaul/3503369-Please-help-plan-our-trip-to-Japan

there are lots of other threads on that board, so maybe have a gander.

also, maybe try other destinations other than the obvious ones - Toyama, Ishikawa, Tohoku, Shikoku

ANA have a good page www.ana.co.jp/en/jp/japan-travel-planner/

have fun planning! Japan is pretty cool, even if I do say so myself (lived here for nearly 28 years)

TanteRose thank you.

I know you said you went to church are there many Christians in Japan? is there any discrimination against Christians and are DH's family also Christians?
I know Shinto is the official religion but does it impact daily life
what do people really think re king abdicating?

hope you have a very happy marriage and wedding