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AMA

I'm an airline pilot and mother. AMA

62 replies

Down3Greens · 06/08/2018 12:47

Since previous threads seem to be by either male pilots or their wives, here's a chance to ask about the female perspective on things. I'm a long-time MN poster (name changed for this) who is mother to 2 children and periodically put on my work hat to fly a Boeing 777 to somewhere far away. It's a massive juggling act but I can't imagine it being any other way. I would almost certainly be sacked from any job that doesn't involve me being kept well away from other people most of the time! GrinGrin

People do seem to be fascinated by the idea of women in a cockpit, much more so than men. So go ahead and ask me anything.

OP posts:
Anyonewhoknows · 06/08/2018 13:22

What does your oh do? If your oh could read the pilots wife thread would he relate to much of what was said?
How long have you been a pilot? How far pregnant were you when you stopped flying?
Do female pilots have the same unfaithful reputation that male pilots do? (Purely going on the other thread for that question)
Were you really clever at school?

MrsGB2225 · 06/08/2018 13:24

What do you do for childcare?

Anyonewhoknows · 06/08/2018 13:25

Sorry - more questions. Did you always want to be a pilot?
What was your scariest moment?
Have you ever had any negative reaction when passengers realise a woman (shock, horror) is the pilot?

Anyonewhoknows · 06/08/2018 13:26

How often a pilots breathalysed and is there a higher percentage of men of fail than women?

PestoSurfissimos · 06/08/2018 13:28

What aircraft type was your first rating?

olderthanyouthink · 06/08/2018 13:30

Do you kids win the one up-ings with "yeah, well, my mum can fly!"?

CraftyGin · 06/08/2018 13:32

Are there many female pilots? What about the ratio of captains to co-pilots?

I encountered my first one on an Edinburgh - Heathrow flight this year.

overandunder9 · 06/08/2018 13:33

What route did you take to get into the career? Is there a ‘best’ way to do it and do females stand a better or worse chance of getting into it?

Topseyt · 06/08/2018 13:41

Do you have regular routes you fly? Have you favourite routes and destinations?

How long do you end up away from your family for.

I must say that I find it a fascinating job and industry, even though I am a nervous passenger during a flight.

Do you think that the representation of women in the cockpit is now improving, even though it is probably still male dominated?

Down3Greens · 06/08/2018 14:41

DH is a manager in an office. He seems to be far busier than me with his job! I suspect he would not recognise much of what is being asked on the pilot's wife thread as I am part time and organise much of the childcare and household. He is baffled by any requests for him to arrange his work day around any of the kids' activities as he has to go to work! I am fortunate enough to be able to arrange most of my work around the kids thanks to our work allocation system (which is soon to change and will no doubt cause me considerable grief) and an active trip swapping culture.

I've been a pilot for 20 years, but stopped flying each time I became pregnant. I stopped at about 6 weeks each time and resumed flying when the first was 9 months old and the 2nd was 14 months old (I was supposed to go back when DC2 was 10 months old but due to completely unrelated issues was unable to pass my medical.)

I knew someone would ask about the reputation for unfaithfulness. I have been happily married and faithful for much longer than I have been a pilot. The majority of my work colleagues are also faithful as far as I can tell, however there do seem to be quite a few divorced male pilots out there. Having spent many hours stuck in a cockpit with just them for company, in some cases I suspect they would be divorced no matter what their profession! I've flown with quite a few of my female colleagues too - the majority are happily married and many have children. In my career I've come across 2 notable exceptions - one unfortunately has the same first name as me and I often spend introductions to other crew members saying 'no, I'm not THAT xxx!' The other one was quite open about the affair she was having with another colleague, much to everyone else's disapproval.

Am I clever? Not clever enough for my first choice of career, apparently. Before children I would often win the local pub quiz though! Is that what you mean? Grin

For childcare I have a local lady who has looked after my kids for nearly 8 years. Occasionally my husband ends up having to stay away overnight with work at the same time as me and we throw ourselves on my mum's mercy. At a push, I am able to bid to work weekends if we are really struggling for childcare. It's a juggling act. Throw in all the animals we have, and I end up running a very complicated diary of who is looking after what. I spend hours on my diary and spreadsheet. I often sort it out while on a nightstop somewhere.

I am lucky in that I haven't had any really scary moments. I've had complicated situations that needed input to prevent them becoming scary or dangerous, but my most notable moments at work which got my heart racing have all been on the ground. On one occasion we were waiting to take off and we discovered a significant fuel problem which would have given us the same issues as a fuel leak. Fortunately we discovered it before take off. Another memorable occasion was when a passenger died during disembarking. I've had 3 passengers die while getting off the plane but none in flight. I'm trying not to take it personally!

Some people do tend to react negatively when they realise their pilot is a woman. That's not my problem. I was called to deal with a passenger who wouldn't comply with the female cabin crew during boarding once. His religion meant he wouldn't acknowledge her or her request to see his boarding card. He was denied boarding as he has to show his boarding card, so demanded to speak to a male cabin crew member. All of the cabin crew were female, so he demanded to see the pilot. Normally I don't get involved with boarding, but on this occasion I was delighted to go and see what he wanted! He eventually got over his religious aversion to women for the duration of the flight. It was either that or don't travel. He has been the most extreme example though.

Pilots arent routinely breathalysed. I've never been in 20 years of flying. We would only be breathalysed if we had given someone reason to think we were drunk.

My first commercial type rating was the Boeing 737.

My kids think it is fairly normal that I fly. My eldest child likes to tell everyone within about 2 minutes of meeting them. DC2 is quieter about it but would like to fly for a living. We'll see about that! Eyesight may be a problem there. I do take my kids to work with me (with DH to look after them, obviously.) They have been for long weekends to places most people would consider a dream come true. DC1 will soon be old enough to come with me unaccompanied. I think school holidays will become much more fun once I am able to take a mini-me with me on a trip!

The proportion of female pilots in my airline is about 5%, worldwide about 3% of pilots are women. About 30% of women pilots are captains, the rest are first officers - it is much easier to control your home life if you have the best pick of the rosters and time off, so staying a senior first officer is much better than becoming a captain while kids are small, although I do know women who have managed it.

Wrt my rosters and trips, I like flying trips which are 3-4 days long, and take me somewhere either exciting or relaxing. I've been to the Caribbean a fair bit this year, and travelled to Asia (India, China, Hong Kong) a fair bit too. I am not a fan of going to North America or the Middle East. I am able to express a preference for where I go and my roster usually reflects what I've asked for. Frequently though, my roster revolves around parent's evening, sports day, the school play, etc! I try not to work weekends, bank holidays or birthdays, but it's not possible to get all the days off that I want so I have to balance things there.

I got into flying through an airline sponsored scheme. I think the cost of flying school put a lot of women off for a long time, but the cost of university is not much less these days.

OP posts:
Anyonewhoknows · 06/08/2018 14:59

What was your first choice of career?
Thank you for answering so comprehensively. I find it fascinating even though it isn't a job I could do.
At what point are you considering retiring? Do you find it harder the older your DC get? If you had to stop being a pilot tomorrow what would you do instead?

NameChangedAgain18 · 06/08/2018 15:05

Why do you think the UK has so few female pilots compared to, say, a country like India (12% of pilots are female there)?

Bobbiepin · 06/08/2018 15:13

Ooh this is very interesting. Do you have to have perfect eye sight? Is wearing appropriate glasses not sufficient?

Down3Greens · 06/08/2018 15:15

My first choice of career was veterinary medicine. If I had to stop being a pilot tomorrow I don't have a plan. DH says I would certainly be able to do most of the jobs he has done, but having listened to some of his teleconferences I think it wouldn't be for me.

I don't know why India has so many women pilots. They are way ahead of the rest of the world. The UK has slightly higher than average numbers of female pilots, but whatever India is doing to encourage it's women, they need to share it and get them flying everywhere! I would love to have more women pilots to fly with - I have had some great trips with other women, and I wish it happened more often.

OP posts:
Down3Greens · 06/08/2018 15:19

You don't need perfect eyesight. Your eyesight actually needs to be fairly bad not to be able to pass a medical. Many of my colleagues wear glasses for various conditions. We have radar displays that show us the location of other aircraft these days - we don't need to see and avoid the enemy as airline pilots, which is where the need for good eyesight came from! A bigger problem is that we spend so much time looking at screens now (all of my navigation charts are loaded onto an iPad, even the artificial horizon is computerised) that we are getting eye strain.

OP posts:
RideOn · 07/08/2018 00:54

How much do you earn in a year?

Gojira · 07/08/2018 09:26

Are you a captain or FO?

RatRolyPoly · 07/08/2018 09:29

How did you deal with the sleep-deprivation when you returned to work post-dc?

I know both times I've returned to work I was a walking zombie for months, but then again mine were never sleepers. I could have napped under the desk though, I was that tired! And your job, well; it takes operating heavy machinery to a whole new level! How the bloody hell did you manage it??

MrsMotherHen · 07/08/2018 09:33

now this is a great AMA! Girl power! I have never come across a woman pilot

DeltaG · 07/08/2018 09:45

Love this. Thanks for posting OP! I was starting to lose the will to live reading all the 'I'm a banker's/pilot's/millionaire's wife' AMAs!

bobstersmum · 07/08/2018 09:51

I have nothing to ask but just wanted to say I am in awe of you!

Down3Greens · 07/08/2018 10:19

I'm an FO. I've applied for a command this year though and should get it.

I'm not going to give my exact salary but with flying pay, allowances etc a full time long haul first officer earns in the region of £80-130k. I am at the upper end of the range and I'm part time.

Wrt sleep, when I went back to work I found the nights away from home in hotels to be bliss. I had to be full time for 4 months and stayed away in places such as the Bahamas and East Africa for 1-2 nights and it recharged me. As pilots flying long night flights we get used to taking strategic short controlled naps and ensuring we are in a fit state at the end of a night awake. I found I had to be very organised in planning in sleep slots if I had been awake at work all night and at home all day, but my childcare lady used to stay for a few hours after I got home so I could catch up on sleep.

OP posts:
NameChangedAgain18 · 07/08/2018 10:23

How do you make sure you sleep when you need to? i.e. do you use specific techniques? As a chronic insomniac myself, I can’t imagine being able to do this!

Down3Greens · 07/08/2018 10:30

Err, I just close my eyes and sleep. It's a skill! I only get one shot at it though. god help anyone who wakes me up when I'm trying to nap! Even 10 minutes can be enough to keep me up and awake for hours longer. It's how Ellen MacArthur sailed solo round the world.

All this 'you have to be clever to be a pilot' - you just need to be able to sleep anywhere and have a good sense of direction and situational awareness! And to eat everything that is put in front of you. GrinGrin

OP posts:
PanGalaticGargleBlaster · 07/08/2018 10:37

A profession I wanted to pursue, alas I found out in my teens that I had a mild red/green colour blindness.