What is the best lube? Find lubrication for sex, TTC, vaginal dryness and sex toys

When it comes to sex, using a high-quality lube can make a world of difference. Particularly if you suffer from vaginal dryness or if you’re trying to conceive - you want to make sure you pick the best lubricant for the job.

Whether it’s for PIV, masturbation with a vibrator or foreplay, lubricant can help to intensify connections and sensations during use, reduce friction, prevent discomfort and injury, and more importantly, elevate the enjoyment of intimate moments overall, including the main event.

Top five lubricants for sex: at a glance

1. Best overall: Sliquid H2O Original Water-Based Lubricant, £20

2. Best for sex toys: Lovehoney Enjoy Water-based Lubricant, £13

3. Best for vaginal dryness and menopause: Yes Water Based Intimate Lubricant, £17

4. Best sperm-friendly for TTC: Pre-Seed Fertility Lube, £14

5. Best silicone lube: Überlube Luxury Lubricant, £19

Additionally, using lube can enhance sexual function and arousal, increasing the chances of orgasm by 80% for women, according to studies. And even if you are already naturally wet, using a little bit of lube can still enhance the experience.

"Lube is your best friend", according to Lucy Rowett, Sex Coach at The Lowdown. "Don't be ashamed to need more than you think because hormonal changes result in more vaginal dryness. However, lube isn't just for when you're dry, it enhances everything and can help you keep lubricating naturally, too."

Holly Jackson, Co-Founder of SheSpot, explains the differences between lube types. "The main difference between these lubes comes down to their ingredients and texture" she says, and each has its best use:

• Water-based lubes are "the most common and versatile. They're easy to clean off, non-sticky, and safe to use with all condoms and sex toys. Perfect for most situations and everyday use."

• Silicone-based lubes "last longer and provide a super-slick feel, which makes them ideal for activities like water play (e.g. in the shower or bath). However, they should not be used with silicone sex toys because they can degrade the material. They’re great for long-lasting lubrication."

• Oil-based lubes "are thicker and last the longest, but they shouldn’t be used with latex condoms as they can cause the condom to break. Oil-based lubes are better for things like massage or other activities where long-lasting lubrication is important."

When buying a lubricant, there are certain things you should consider before purchasing, which include:

• Base type: is it water-based, which is versatile and toy-safe, silicone-based that's long-lasting and great for anal, or oil-based, which isn't latex-safe and stains?

• Ingredients to avoid: Holly Jackson advises, "There are a few key ingredients to watch out for, especially if you're prone to irritation or infections:

  • Parabens, which are used as preservatives, can disrupt the natural balance of bacteria in the vagina and should be avoided.

  • Glycerin is another ingredient to watch out for, as it can promote yeast infections in some people.

  • Artificial fragrances or flavors can also cause irritation or allergic reactions.

  • Alcohol-based lubes can be drying and irritating, especially for sensitive skin. Look for lubes that are fragrance-free, paraben-free, and glycerin-free to ensure they’re gentle on vaginal health."

• Allergies and sensitivities: Opt for hypoallergenic or natural options if prone to irritation.

• pH-balance: is it suitable for vaginal use with a pH of 3.5 to 4.5 (prevents infections)? Or is it fertility-friendly, ideally a pH of 7 to 8, which mimics cervical mucus.

• Thickness: thicker lubes reduce friction (like silicone-based ones), whereas thinner lubes feel more natural.

• Sperm-friendly: if trying to conceive, choose “fertility-friendly” lubes.

• Numbing agents: avoid for anal sex, as they can mask pain and lead to injury.

• Material compatibility: Holly Jackson clarifies, "it depends on the material of the condom and sex toy":

  • Water-based lubes are "safe with all types of condoms (latex, polyurethane, polyisoprene) and sex toys (silicone, glass, metal, etc.)."

  • Silicone-based lubes "should not be used with silicone sex toys because they can cause the material to degrade. They’re also not compatible with latex condoms, so be careful there."

  • Oil-based lubes "can’t be used with latex condoms as they can cause them to break. They're also not advisable for use with silicone sex toys for the same reason."

• Ease of cleaning: Water-based lubes are easiest to wash off and non-sticky.

• Hydrating ingredients: Aloe vera, hyaluronic acid, or vitamin E help with vaginal dryness.

SKIP TO: How I test | Best lube roundup | How to choose | Different types | Vaginal dryness | Water vs silicone | Safe with condoms | Allergies | CBD lube | Aloe lube | Sex toys

How I test the best lubes

Over the last year, I've been busy testing various vibrators, other sex toys and essentials to make sure we're only recommending Mumsnet user-approved and expert-backed products in our roundups. This includes the various lubrications available on the market from the likes of SheSpot, Lovehoney and Boots.

The following products have been awarded some of the best lubes for sex, trying to conceive, anal, vaginal dryness, and with sex toys to make sure that:

• You're using the right one for the right job.

• You're not putting yourself or your toys at risk.

• You have an enjoyable, pleasurable time all around.

Best lube for sex and play, a roundup

Read on to discover the best lubricants that I've personally tested and recommend.

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How do I choose the right lube for me for sex?

When choosing a lube, you should consider your personal preferences, sensitivities, and the type of sexual activity you’ll be engaging in that you need it for. The right lube should help to enhance comfort, reduce friction, and improve overall pleasure for all involved.

Here’s what to keep in mind when choosing the best lubricant for your needs:

1. Base type matters

• Water-based: the most versatile option, safe for use with condoms and sex toys. It’s easy to wash off but may need reapplication during longer sessions.

• Silicone-based: long-lasting and great for shower sex or anal play but not compatible with most silicone sex toys as it'll degrade them!

• Oil-based: offers a smooth glide but can weaken latex condoms and stain fabrics (so make sure you have a sex blanket). Best for external play rather than penetrative sex.

2. Sensitivities and skin compatibility

If you have sensitive skin, it’s best to avoid lubes with glycerin, parabens, artificial fragrances, or numbing agents, as these can cause irritation or infections.

Instead, opt for hypoallergenic lubes like Sliquid H2O Original that's made with natural ingredients like aloe vera or hyaluronic acid, especially if you experience vaginal dryness.

3. The right lube for each type of intimacy

• For vaginal sex: water-based or silicone-based lubes work well, depending on whether you prefer easy cleanup or long-lasting glide.

• For anal sex: a thick, cushiony lubricant (usually silicone or thicker water-based) is ideal to reduce friction and enhance comfort. If using this with anal toys, though, make sure that you're not using silicone toys.

• For oral sex: flavoured lubes can add a fun twist, but make sure they are free from sugar and artificial sweeteners to prevent irritation.

• For use with sex toys: stick to water-based lubricants for silicone toys to prevent material degradation. Glass, metal, and ABS plastic toys are compatible with all lube types.

4. Fertility considerations

If you’re trying to conceive, look for fertility-friendly lubes such as Pre-Seed, which are pH-balanced and formulated to support sperm motility. Avoid lubricants with spermicidal agents or those that may disrupt vaginal pH.

5. Ease of use and cleanup

Lubricants vary in texture, stickiness, and how easily they wash off. Water-based lubes clean up effortlessly with soap and water, while silicone-based lubes may require more thorough washing. If you prefer a mess-free experience, opt for a formula that absorbs well without leaving a sticky residue.

6. What feels best to you

According to Lucy, "it’s important to use a lube that you like the feel of more than anything else, otherwise you won’t use it."

Finding the right lubricant is a personal choice, and experimenting with different types can help you discover what works best for you and your partner. Whether you need a lightweight formula for everyday use or a thicker option for specific activities, choosing the right lube can make all the difference in your comfort and pleasure.

Related: Best condoms for all different sizes

The different types of lubes available

1. Water-based lubricants are great for versatility

Water-based lubes are the go-to choice for many individuals due to their versatility. They are compatible with various sexual activities, including vaginal and anal sex, as well as the use of most sex toys. Their easy clean-up and compatibility with condoms make them a popular and user-friendly option.

2. Silicone-based lubricants are long-lasting

If you're looking for prolonged lubrication, silicone-based lubes are an excellent choice, like Überlube. Ideal for activities like anal sex, these lubricants provide a lasting and smooth glide. However, it's crucial to note that silicone lubes are not compatible with most sex toys, so exercise caution and verify compatibility before use.

3. Flavoured lubricants are good for enhanced pleasure

For those indulging in oral sex, flavoured lubes can add a delicious dimension to the experience. Available in an array of enticing flavors, these lubricants are designed to make intimate moments more enjoyable while still providing the necessary lubrication.

4. Oil-based lubricants are great for external play

Oil-based lubes are best reserved for external play, as they can break down latex condoms and may not be suitable for internal use. However, they can be a luxurious option for massage or sensual activities, adding an extra layer of pleasure to external stimulation.

It's essential to be aware of the specific characteristics and compatibility of each type of lube to ensure a safe and satisfying experience. Additionally, consider any potential sensitivities or allergies when making your selection. Always follow the product instructions and, if in doubt, consult GP or sex expert. Ultimately, the best lube for you is the one that aligns with your preferences and enhances your overall intimate experience.

What causes vaginal dryness?

If you're using lube during sex for vaginal dryness, there are several factors that could be causing this discomfort. It's a common issue that many, if not all, women will experience at different stages of their lives. And some of the most common causes include:

1. Hormonal changes

Menopause leads to a decrease in oestrogen levels, which can lead to thinning of the vaginal lining and reduced lubrication. Breastfeeding has the same affect for new mothers, due to hormonal changes postpartum.

2. Medications

Certain medications like antihistamines, antidepressants, and even some contraceptives may contribute to vaginal dryness as a side effect.

3. Medical conditions

Autoimmune disorders like Sjögren's syndrome can cause dryness in the vagina, and vaginal atrophy - the thinning, drying and inflammation of the vaginal walls, is often associated with hormonal changes.

4. Emotional factors

Stress and anxiety can affect sexual function and may contribute towards dryness.

5. Allergies and irritants

Allergic reactions to certain soaps, perfumes, laundry detergents, or other personal care products can lead to irritation and dryness.

6. Lack of arousal

Insufficient sexual arousal or lack of foreplay can result in inadequate natural lubrication.

7. Chemotherapy and radiation therapy

Cancer treatments like chemo and radiation can affect hormonal levels and contribute to vaginal dryness.

8. Douching

Overuse of douches or harsh cleansing products can disrupt the natural balance of vaginal flora and lead to dryness.

Of course, if you're experiencing persistent vaginal dryness, it's worth consulting with your GP to discuss if there's any underlying cause and they'll recommend the appropriate treatment options for you. These might include hormonal therapies, moisturisers, lubricants and any other interventions necessary depending on your specific circumstances.

What is the difference between water-based and silicone-based lubes?

Water-based lubes are easily washable, are compatible with most toys and condoms, and provide a natural feel. Although, they may dry out more quickly.

Whereas silicone-based lubricants offer longer-lasting glides, and are ideal for activities in water. They’re not, however, easily absorbed by the body and users may experience stickiness with some lubricants.

It's important to note that silicone-based lubricants cannot be used with silicone sex toys, as the silicone can stick to the toy and potentially damage its texture and feel.

"Avoid any lube that has glycerine in– which is usually found in cheaper water based lubes– because it turns to sugar on contact with oxygen over a period of time," says Lucy Rowett, "and you do not want to be dealing with a yeast infection, too."

Related: Best sex toys for women

Are lubes safe to use with condoms?

Not all lubricants are compatible with condoms - like the Yes Plant Oil Based lube. If you’re using condoms, make sure you choose lubricants that are specifically labelled as condom- or latex-compatible to ensure they won’t compromise the integrity of the condom.

"Water based lube is great for every kind of sexy play", shares Lucy. "It’s compatible with condoms and all toys, but it does dry out quickly so it’s not best for any kind of anal play.

"Oil based lube is great too, but it isn’t compatible with condoms and can cause them to rupture."

Can lubricants cause allergies or irritations?

Some individuals may have sensitivities to certain ingredients used in lubes. It’s important to choose hypoallergenic and non-toxic lubricants where possible, as they are free from common irritants like parabens, glycerin, or fragrances. A good hypoallergenic option in our roundup that is recommended by Mumsnet users is the Sliquid H20 Original Water-Based Lubricant from Lovehoney.

Related: Best sex toys for couples

Is CBD lube safe? How does it work?

CBD lube is basically a lubricant that has a cannabis extract in called cannabidiol (CBD) in it, which when used during sexual intercourse, aim to increase sexual pleasure and increase the length of your session. Benefits include an increase in sensitivity, relaxation, stronger orgasms, and a decrease in pain that can accompany penetrative sex.

A good CBD lube to try would be the Mantric CBD Water-Based Lubricant with Indian Ginseng available at Lovehoney, but stock can vary.

Is aloe lube safe? How does it work?

While the inclusion of aloe might lead you to assume that this type of lubricant is all healthy and natural, take care before you start smothering yourself with oil or creams that include it.

Lube with aloe in should be water-based, gentle on your skin and suitable for both vaginal and oral sex. Like this one by Boots or DAME's aloe lubricant.

Related: Best sex blankets to save on your washing

Can lube be used with sex toys?

Yes, many lubricants are safe to use with sex toys. In fact, using lubrication with sex toys can enhance the overall experience and make it more pleasurable. Lubes reduce friction, provide a smooth glide, and can make insertion or penetration more comfortable.

It's important to choose one that is compatible with the material of your sex toy. Water-based lubes are generally safe to use with all types of sex toys, including those made of silicone, rubber, or other materials. However, it's always a good idea to check the manufacturer's guidelines or instructions for your specific sex toy to ensure compatibility with lubricants.

Why you should trust us

We work hard to provide unbiased, independent advice you can trust. We do sometimes earn revenue through affiliate (click-to-buy) links in our articles. This helps us fund more helpful reviews like this one.

About the expert

• Lucy Rowett is a certified sexologist and sex coach who is passionate about helping women let go of sexual shame and hangups.

• Holly Jackson is Co-founder of SheSpot, along with Kalila Bolton. The duo launched SheSpot in 2021 with the aim of bringing women’s sexual wellbeing into the mainstream.

About the author

Rebecca Roberts is a writer, editor, and content marketing expert hailing from Leeds. Here at Mumsnet, she commissions, writes, and edits to bring parents content designed to make life easier. After birthing and breastfeeding two babies in two years, Rebecca knows first-hand how hard it can be to reignite intimacy. From condoms, to lubes, to sex toys - she’s on a quest to find the best ones, with the help of Mumsnet user recommendations.

Beyond her role as an editor here at Mumsnet, Rebecca can be found balancing life as a working mum of two toddlers and when she’s not at her desk, you’ll likely find her at a local playgroup, in a nearby coffee shop, walking the dog, or hiding from her neighbour as she attempts to buy condoms during her weekly “Big Food Shop”.

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