I think I'm becoming transphobic

I feel the same way. I detest the term 'cis woman' I'm just a woman. I also refused to have my pronouns on my email and work badges. Caused a huge thing at work but I really don't care. People can do as they please and be who ever they want. Just leave me out of it!!

Gosh.

Are you not going to assume good faith and convince the OP that they are wrong and present evidence to explain why?

Are you really not bored with thinking this is all about a mythical third sex such as 'trans people', rather what its about, which is the rights women and girls to safety, privacy and dignity? Are you really not bored with pushing your Male Supremacist narrative, that a re-badged male in a dress is not a fox anymore and should be let in the hen house?

Are you genuinely not bored with your hateful Male Supremacist agenda?

💯 this

But I'm starting to believe that you cannot change sex

///

My mind boggles that you ever believed this

However what you are describing is simply pro women and children.

Are you not all bored with agreeing with each other that transgender people are all mentally ill

They are mentally - if not "ill" then "affected" because this feeling that you are a different gender is literally in their minds. It can't be in their bodies because, absent modifications, their bodies don't change.

And it is ok to be mentally ill, we are all far more open to discussing mental health and that can only be a good thing.

But as we know from anorexics etc, it is not healthy or helpful to collude in a delusion. For sure we can "be kind" and most of us are (pronouns, names etc) but many of us do not buy into, or reinforce the delusion that a person can change sex.

Are you not bored popping up here spouting your nonsense over and over? Why read a board that you hate? Baby names bore me so I don't go on there, especially not to tell them I hate the discussion of baby names. Is there not a better use of your time?

Despite being asked a million times, can you attempt to answer why you think biological males should take part in women's sports, be placed in women's prisons and attend rape counselling sessions with female rape survivors?

you need to reframe your feelings. Put women first, and not always centre (as Kathleen Stock put it) people with a sex mismatched gender identity.

That way you are pro women, and not transphobic.

But: why are you worried about seeming transphobic? Either you think it's ok for you to change in a room with your trans friends, or you don't. Why would that make you transphobic rather than shy or private?

Damn! Chocolate is transphobic?? What am I going to do?? 😭
On the bright side it's given me a decent list of films to watch

Human's can't change sex.

They can be operated on, fooled into thinking they can, but it's a lie. A massive, painful, foolish lie. Effectively they are being tortured under false promise.

Well you may be becoming transphobic - but it's more likely you are just escaping a brainwashing cult and realising that actually women have rights too.

Most people standing up for women's rights dont hate or fear trans people but they do recognise that no-one can change sex. They also recognise that activists are trying to remove women's rights to safe spaces. Activists have also greatly harmed children like your stepdaughter.

There are people that can help your step-daughter identify why she feels distress about her body and how to deal with this in a healthy fashion. Fortunately the NHS has woken up to the damage that was being done to children. Get your husband to read the CASS report and to understand why puberty blockers are banned. Read about the harm she could do to her body if she uses binders or wants cross sex hormones.

Many young women will now desist as they grow up but seek out the good sources of advice that have been mentioned.

@MyGhastIsFlabbered I don't have much time to post; I wish I did.

One tip is to only ever think about the word gender with the word gender stereotypes after it.

Eg: "What's your gender stereotype identity?"

"Toilet: all gender stereotypes."

It demonstrates the sexism that feminists and women's liberation tried os hard to escape

Unfortunately in a way you were brainwashed, your socialisation as a female was used against you. It's why the be kind mantra when used in conjunction with acceptance without exception and no debate worked so well for so long. Then when you add in the thought ending mantras of twaw and tmam, with a liberal sprinkling of pronoun declaration it all becomes somewhat c**t like.
Then we come to the socal punishment for deviating from accepted party line at the low end you become a socal pariah and the other is the treatment hand out to Sandie Peggie and JKR(to name but a few).
It takes time to recover from such a mental battering so give yourself some time and maybe look at some of the break it down for me threads as there aimed at those who have recently come to see the problems with gender ideology.
Unfortunately many of us long-term users have been in this fight for quite some time and have seen many TRAs come on here with threads claiming to be newly gc and posting goady things to get screenshots usually with similarly titled threads with have left some of us slightly jaded please don't take it personally

The sad thing is that OP's husband doesn't seem to have any 'paternal instinct' towards his daughter. Most fathers are very protective of their daughters, and would recoil in horror at their daughter being alone in a male only space where men have their dicks out.

He really doesn't seem to have any paternal feeling or instinct for his little girl at all. Its sad. But going by a thread OP started a few years back, her husband doesn't seem to have any care or concern for women and girls in general.

You’re not wrong. It’s completely ridiculous. I’m happy to play along out of social courtesy but just looks at the threads on this site. Top thread is someone suffering from endo, hundreds of women having the same.

Im currently post partum. Just had my abdomen sliced open and toddling around on morphine in agony with breasts on the verge of mastitis hoping to god my nerve damage is temporary with a vagina as dry as anything; emailing my team to tell them the good news babe has arrived and hoping to god I have a job to go back to after (contracting consultant).

Sex is real. Gender is a social construct.

The conflation of ‘believing in biological reality’ and transphobia has been one of the aims of the TRA movement, so any rational objection to their ideology can be shouted down as bigotry.

Transwomen are not biological women. This is a fundamental truth, not a slur.

Autogynephiles (men who engage in cross dressing and performative ‘femininity’ for paraphilic thrills) are not transwomen, though are now described as such - not only legitimising fetishistic behaviour in public, but allowing those same men access to every protected female space.

The muddying of the waters around all of this and the insanity of self-ID has led to a wholesale dismantling of women’s sex-based rights and protections.

To understand this and object to it does not make you transphobic.

Hope your daughter doesn't sink too deep in the "trans" shit.

He's also not concerned because he isn't thinking about the other men in the single sex spaces that your DSD is using. They have just as much of a right to single sex accommodations as women do, it's just that because they're men they're less likely to be at physical risk from a female person in their single sex space. But they're just as entitled to privacy and feeling comfortable in an place where they would expect a single sex space as women are. Their right to a single sex space is not his to give away.

‘Also DSD goes into the male bathrooms when out - this makes me incredibly uncomfortable but DH doesn't seem concerned.’

He’s not concerned, because he is a man, and doesn’t understand that his daughter could be putting herself in danger from other men by going into an enclosed ‘private space’ which is clearly signed as not for her use. You have to make him understand that there are ( plenty of) men who would see this as an opportunity to demonstrate the essential reality of biological sex. There are others who would be outraged at the invasion of their privacy, and would express their outrage physically.

Please try to make him see how dangerous this is.

Feminism arose purely because women's needs are entirely different to men's.

This is based in their biological make up. And no, it's not biologically essentialism. Women can become pregnant and so need specific protections and support for that.

Women can become pregnant through choice, accident or force.

The latter two require more support and safeguards.

Men aren't included in any of this.

Women who think they're men still need the above.

You're realistic

Once you start to see "it" and the associated problems and harms, it's very difficult not to.

@Beekeepingmum exactly.

I'm not Islamophobic because I don't share the belief that there is one God and Muhammed is his prophet.

I'm not Hinduphobic because I don't believe that beef is proscribed.

I'm not Christianphobic because I don't believe Jesus died to save me.

I'm not athiestphobic because I think there might be a god but there's no way to know or prove it either way.

I'm not transphobic because I don't share the belief that humans can change sex.

OP I have found it so much easier now that the push to declare gender identity as being based in anything even remotely biological (eg. gender dysphoria being a medical condition) as being the commonality between people with transgender identities has moved on.

Understanding that this is a personal belief, a philosophical belief, makes it much easier to evaluate and see how everything sits together.

And then from that basis, you also then understand that there is no need to comply and act as if a person’s philosophical belief is materially real.

Yes. There is no minority group or struggle that trans won't colonise or appropriate. They really are as many experts have deemed them, parasites. Termites that attach themselves to an established (and vulnerable) group and eat away at that group from the inside out. Look at how they have colonised LGB and are now eating away at the hard work and good will and acceptance LGB gained. Trans are the privileged sacred caste. They are actually the white people in any given situation. Intact males in a dress are not a 'minority', they are not 'marginalised', they are not 'vulnerable'. They are the privileged white people. They are the colonisers, the usurpers. The transgressors.