Girls play outside less than boys even at two years old

Put leggings and tshirt underneath. She can then remove the dress if she feels like it.

I'm not sure little girls particularly think "I'm wearing a dress so I can't run and jump around". That's more likely to be a parental attitude I think. "I don't like taking DD outside because she gets her dress dirty / keeps flashing her knickers."

In discussions about trousers simply being more practical for moving about, I find it helpful to remember that men have preferentially worn skirts, tunics and robes for most of human history. Trousers have really only caught on as society has become sedentary!

I have a 6yo girl and a 3yo boy. I can't really identify anything different about their play etc that I could put down to some innate sex difference. It is true that my boy spends a lot of time playing with copious amounts of toy vehicles that my girl didn't. I am sure that is because people have bought him copious amounts of toy vehicles to play with, and they didn't for my girl! Otherwise he likes the same books, similar/same role play games, TV shows, crafts, activities and so on as she did/does. In fact he's actually less physically active and developed than my girl was but that's due to some health limitations he has sadly.

My DD has a soft play party this morning. Tried to encourage her to wear something comfy like leggings/joggers but no, she wants to wear her Elsa dress 🙄

Im now paranoid that the other parents will think I'm one of 'those mums that only care about cute outfits!

Lost count of the amount of times people in my life have told me to exercise my boys. I just don’t think parents of girls are getting the same messaging.

Clothes are a huge barrier - and have got so much worse. When I was growing up I lived in trousers - dresses for rare special occasions only. Now little girls are dressed like party princesses from day one by mothers obsessed with the “cute outfits” 🙄 and they are completely impractical for playing. Gender stereotypes are so much worse than they used to towards the end of the last century - so sad.

I said upthread something about our evolutionary past and as the years have gone by I have definitely shifted what I believe about differences between the sexes: I increasingly think that a lot of it is genetic (I was desperate to stay at home with my babies; DH didn't enjoy paternity leave...). That said, there is a bell curve of behaviour and a huge degree of overlap, and it drives me nuts to see young children forced into narrow parameters based on whether they are boys or girls.

Sending 6 year old girls to school in shoes they can't run in gives the girls a very clear message: appearance matters more than physical capacity or the freedom to make a choice, and the boys don't have to worry about this.

No wonder some of them at 10 are obsessed by hair, nails and sparkles. They've been told since infancy that this is what matters when you haven't got a willy, not racing around the playground making lots of noise and keeping fit.

Yes, it's okay to be interested in how your hair looks, and to do indoor activities that hone your fine motor skills, but to not be able to run around the playground is just bloody shocking when you stop and think about it.

We should be encouraging our children to do both.

There are real advantages to humans being outside though so it's not about valuing something that's perceived as a male trait.

There's no reason that typically girls games can't take place outside. You can make fantastic dens & "play house" in the woods just as easily as at home.

I suspect that because uk humans spend so little time outside this exaggerates the difference between the sexes.

Also really agree with this, many pp seem to indicate that the 'boys' play of being outside etc is in some way better than what girls are doing and we should ensure girls do the same. Maybe we should just be mindful of stereotypes but otherwise let kids be kids, there are sex differences beyond just genitals, at quite a young age and it's odd to think that would extend into behaviour and play.

This is such a good post. I completely agree! I have two boys and try to avoid stereotypes as much as possible, but they are both incredibly stereotypical boys 😂 obsessed with being outside, cars, bikes, tractors etc etc. they do have toy buggys but they are used as vehicles not for dolls! Lots of parents I know say the same, most with at least one of each. There's nothing wrong with boys and girls playing differently, one is not better than the other.

Hard agree. Men and women simply aren't the same. Culture and socialisation play a part but I think much of it is native.

Many of my cubs (age 8-10) struggled to ride 3 laps of a football field this summer

@MorrisZapp I think the trans debate is really shining a light on the differences between the sexes, but I do wonder to what extent what you describe is nature or nurture, with sex based differences so engrained into society I think it's going to take a long time to decipher what is genuinely genetic and what is learned.

Some great points about dress and stereotyping here.

i do wonder though why we lean towards ‘boys’ play as being of more value than ‘girls’ play… is getting covered in mud better than hand clapping games? Dinosaurs more worthy than dolls? Or do we think of them more highly because of our own conditioning, i.e. the activities are better because they are stereotypically done by boys?

I was raised by a radical feminist and I'm always pointing out misogyny etc but I'm coming to the conclusion that boys and girls are broadly different.

My son is an outdoor runner abouter. I never was and neither was my sister, despite being dressed in very practical clothing.

Come to think of it my PhD holding wimmins studies mum didn't even take us to the park, that was a dad job until we were old enough to go ourselves, ditto the pool etc. My mum was too busy reading and talking on the phone.

I remember on holiday when DS was small they were offering a t-shirt painting activity with all the materials supplied. It looked so much fun but DS wouldn't hear of it, wouldn't even look at it. Of the kids sitting absorbed in the t-shirt decorating almost all of them were girls. I quite fancied it myself.

I see this played out everywhere, among families who absolutely do not push stereotypes. Meanwhile school actively encourage everyone to do everything. But they're still... boys and girls.

I'm quite lazy and don't like getting cold - my girls definitely don't have the energy levels that I can see some boys do. Not sure if it's a genuine difference or they've just inherited my lazy genes.

They also never wanted to get dressed at all, they were always happiest in just knickers which used to make leaving the house a bit tricky.

The sexism starts from birth.

Cuddles/rough play/crying/food- there are sex differences.

Similar experience to you. I used to get really irritated at the shiny shoes which meant if we wanted to play outdoor games it was always more uncomfortable for them. It affects learning and interests as well.

I agree about kids clothing, the "boys" clothes are generally better quality, warmer, and better suited to active children. Last weekend looking for joggers for my daughter, in one shop I compared the boys and girls joggers for the same age (8), wish I'd taken a photo. Girls joggers are thinner, no working drawstring (if they have one it's decoration only, never functional) and the pockets are much smaller. Both the same price. I bought the ones labelled "boys". I have similarly purchased boys school shoes, trainers, trousers, T-shirts and even swimming stuff (shorts and rash vest).
I've sent complaints to various high street stores for similar discrimination against girls clothing. Still hoping to see changes....

I was a classic 'tomboy' when I was growing up in the 90s - always picked clothes from the boys section, loved climbing trees and getting mucky. Hated brushing my hair and wouldn't be caught dead in pink or a dress.

Flash forward to when we found out we were expecting a daughter, I was insistent she would be allowed to dress however she liked, play with whatever she liked etc and not conform to silly 'girly' stereotypes. She's 3 now, and turns out she loves all things pink and sparkly, isn't outdoorsy at all and hates getting her clothes/hands mucky. She would MUCH rather be inside Colouring or playing with her role play toys than outside. People might judge and think it's me being precious but it's genuinely her! Not saying it's necessarily a girl thing because like I said, I was the polar opposite, but I'd say most of her female friends are the same whereas her male friends are more inclined to rough, outdoorsy type games. There are exceptions though!! None of the parents are particularly stereotypical on genders it's just how it's panned out..

Our granddaughter at 2 years loved being outside, we have a big garden and she ran riot. There was mud, water, slugs, worms, making mud pies, helping plant flowers. We had a drawer full of old clothes and a pair of wellies and off she'd go. She'd come in filthy, mud in her hair and a worm in her hand, they really were the best days, she was rosy faced and free as a bird.

I’ve twin boys of 4 and a 3 yr old daughter. The boys have always included their sister in their make-believe games and they also take their turn being the cook in their toy kitchen. All 3 have had baby dolls because when their sister was born the boys wanted their own baby to hold. We used to all sit on the sofa holding our babies whilst I was breastfeeding.
When we do go to the play park the boys are protective of their sister and ensure she climbs safely on the equipment.
I’ve never consciously told them to protect her, they’re just caring little boys.

I don’t dress her in clothes that matter if they get dirty or torn but they are typically girl’s clothes. Skirt and t shirt maybe. My boys wear joggers and t shirts.
I enjoy shopping for girls and boys clothes and won’t be made to feel ashamed for dressing my daughter like a little girl.

Then those ball gowns count as movement friendly 😃 my kids climbed trees in dresses & wellies sometimes. Long skirts are actually great for most movement & so long as you know how to hoik them up you can climb in them (though flappy stuff is trickier in grabby branches).

most importantly though I assume there was no one to tell you off for endangering your dress!

I'm far more impressed that you managed to climb in (assuming here as I went to several balls in DMs) typical ball shoes.

I work in early years. Girls arrive in shiny shoes, white frilly dresses and have their nails painted. Boys come in joggers.

Half the girls go home filthy and the parents will be like "oh she's such a boy". Half the girls don't get messy because mummy told them not to mess their dress, or they won't go out because a hat would mess their hair.

Early years.