How best to answer 'What are your preferred pronouns?' in an intervew

If you're a woman then she / her is standard. I don't think it's weird to answer with that.

But the OP is not a man, so she won't be asking them to do this.

Well let’s all start using pronouns then. I’m not about to bed over backwards and Be Kind to pander to a trans.

She/Her

In an interview for a job you really want? I don't believe you.

Personally, I would think Alex was an idiot not to take advantage of her ambiguous name given the research that shows males are taken more seriously in the workplace.

Yes, this is a good answer.

Pronouns are obviously not an ideology and nobody on here is suggesting they are. However, the notion of preferred pronouns is very much an ideology.

I think you know that's what posters mean when they refer to it as an ideology though...

i've been asked both my gender identity and my preferred pronouns on application forms. I've never been asked directly in interview (i've had a few recently!), but i HAVE experienced having all the panel members give their pronouns while introducing themselves, with the tacit expectation that I would give mine when I introduced myself.

In reality, I would say "I really don't mind". Then, if they did look puzzled or press me on it, I'd explain my actual thinking.

A name is a label people use to pick you out, but pronouns like he/she are descriptive. If I ask you to use particular pronouns when referring to me, then I'm telling you how I want you to describe me. I find that uncomfortable and one step away from "Pretty Parrot the Great and Terrible". I'd be more interested in how you describe me without me prompting you tbh.

I hope this makes sense to someone!

You could respond

'ooo, that's cool, can I choose whatever I like?'

In reality, you wouldn’t be asked that question in a job interview! If a company did ask it, I’d think twice about the job.

Did you get the job?

It’s not weirdly paranoid at all. The fact you’re conflating it with flat earth and 5G is kinda odd.

I absolutely would not assume anyone with she/her pronouns on their bio or email was a woman either.

Weirdly paranoid, I guess you also believe that the earth is flat and 5G caused covid.

Wouldn’t a job application ask your sex? If the sex is female, use the feminine pronouns. If the sex is male, use the masculine ones.

Well, that's very courteous of you, FlirtswithRhinos! My pronouns are he/him, thank you for asking!

My experience of being referred to on this forum is not usually so wholesome.

Surely they can't ask, in the same way they they can't ask if you're gay/disabled/a parent?

When I went for my first midwife appointment she asked me about my gender identity, I've been asked this before so just answered female as I couldn't be bothered having a long conversation about it. She then asked me if I was assigned female at birth. I said to my husband later that, if I was born male, I'd be a medical marvel since I'm pretty sure trans women can't get pregnant!

In my head: "f&ck off!"

To the interviewer: "Thank you for your time today".

@deargodno these days if I saw Alex (she/her) in an email signature I would not make any assumption at all that the person emailing me was female. Probably assume the opposite, given that they feel the need to specify. And indeed, required pronouns being given don't and cannot tell you anything about the person's sex, given that gender identity is entirely separate and not dependent on the person's sex.

I replied "ooh interesting question I've never really thought about it before" they tripped over themselves to not force me into picking an answer there and then I was mighty baffled

But to go back to the original topic, it shouldn't be asked what your preferred pronouns are as it's considered bad etiquette to do so. It's one of those things where people mention it if they're comfortable doing so but you don't ask otherwise.

What on Earth difference would it make to a work related conversation whether Alex is male or female? Worst case scenario - you might get it wrong once and then say “oh sorry” and then carry on like grown ups because until this utter nonsense turned up 5 minutes ago that was what we did. Back before it was decided that “misgendering” someone was “literal violence” we just said “oh sorry I didn’t realise you were a man” and carried on as before

(in fact what research does show is that women are disadvantaged when they draw attention to their sex)

Because I get a lot of emails addressed to "Dear sir," which is both mis-sexing and mis-gendering me. I work in a predominantly male industry. I have actually had women come up to me before and say that it's nice to have another woman in the company. They appreciate knowing, if they're new, that I'm also a woman.

@deargodno why does it matter if Alex is male or female? How will you treat them differently once you know what sex they are?