KJK & bringing your whole self to work

Following a throat operation I had nhs speech therapy for a while. Perfectly lovely young woman but her office was adorned with a series of framed trans rights symbols, pictures etc all pink, blue, white. Small and not garish but so unnecessary.

It's not enough that men who transition get state provided voice feminisation training, the therapy room has to be festooned with their religious symbolism lest they feel unsafe or unwelcome.

I just assumed I was dealing with an idiot.

I definitely see this in action where I live. I think there are two things going on though. There have been many influxes of people fleeing religious conflict and coming to the UK as refugees, bringing stricter religion with them - a bit like America, where so many people are devout and many separatist sects have flourished. On the other hand I see born and bred young British women now, with the full face covering walking around with a chip on their shoulder, spoiling for some sort of confrontation.

Totally agree.

Some of the best people I've worked with have been people whose personal lives I knew next to nothing about.

Meanwhile, my friend who is very "be kind" and "TWAW" works in an ultra "be kind" place where people bring their whole selves to work. Everyone has preferred pronouns and shares all their deep and meaningful thoughts with the class, but when a deaf member of staff complained about being excluded in meetings and suggested that the team could have some awareness training, they didn't want to know. Because that would involve actual time, effort and money rather than simply painting fucking rainbows everywhere. And now my friend is going through infertility and IVF and it would be much easier for her to get through the working day if everyone got on with their fucking work instead of sharing pictures of their kids and she wasn't receiving daily emails reminding her to contribute to a gift for a guy who is going on paternity leave soon, but she's stuck in a culture of over sharing.

Let's go back to just bringing our work selves to work.

When I was a teen I worked in a shop in an area with a high Indian and Pakistani population and the Muslim men drank alcohol (they even joked about the irony of fasting during Ramadan and still drinking alcohol on an empty stomach), there was one Sikh man who wore a turban and he had great sales figures, because fellow Sikhs would go to him and he would give them special discounts, so it was a way to signal affiliation/tribe in a very practical sense, not just an expression of his devotion to his faith.

The last few decades all religions seem to be going more extreme and strict. I remember back at the time my colleagues were expressing concern that there was a new Sikh school so strict even the girls all wore turbans.

I've known a couple of Sikh men who had shaven heads. It surprised me! I think the covering of the face or head by Muslim women is cultural rather than religious: I've been told by Moroccans and Tunisians, for example, that it wasn't done at all previously in their counties but has crept in with the spread of Wahabism and the strict forms of Islam.

Personally, I don't mind displays of serious belief, like religion (although I would object to a female doctor covering her face for non-clinical reasons), but I hate tattoos or weird coloured hair on someone with a serious job. Such things erode my faith in them - I wouldn't take advice from someone with blue hair.

I believe Sikhs don’t have to wear Turbans (they mustn’t cut their hair, or walk around without a sword, etc) and Muslim women don’t have to cover their hair either.

This is a genuine question not a gotcha but how do you feel about people who believe their religion requires them to wear something. A turban for example or hijab.

I do agree actually. I find it jarring if I am being treated by someone with symbols of outside interests. Even a cross around the neck I think is a small statement that makes you wonder about who they are as a person, when really, you want to be focused on whatever treatment they are doing. I don’t like tattoos and piercings either. A small stud in the nose isn’t a problem because it is not making a statement about any subculture, but eyebrow or tongue piercings, that kind of thing are too much.

For me, someone making a visible show of their beliefs or subculture is doing it as a message to others, which either aligns them to those others “We share the same beliefs/like the same things” or separates them from those others “I believe differently than you and like different things from you”. It’s not neutral and it’s unnerving in a situation where someone has power over you.

Hmm sort of. I don’t have an issue with the religion thing really. My GP having a cross on their necklace wouldn’t bother me nor would a consultant with a headscarf covering their hair.

Yep totally agree with you. Leave yourself at home. Be a professional and i dont want to know what you think.