Reasons not to cut hair of four year old girl?

Just to add in case it's helpful - I recently got a bamboo hairbrush (with bamboo bristles) and was astonished how much easier it glided through my hair instead of getting stuck in tangles like the plastic brushes I've used all my life. Immediately recommended to all friends with long-haired children!

If DD is happy go for a chin length bob first.

DD decided to go from that to a pixie cut and she loved it BUT did get some low level teasing and was often mistaken for a boy which bothered her a little. She grew it out for a while and then went short again aged 8, grew it out to start Secondary and short again by that Easter. She was mistaken for a boy until she hit secondary school as she obviously wasn't one at that age. Just be aware of that and prepare DD that people might get confused because people don't look properly and when they see short hair think someone's a boy. I also showed her lots of women through time with short hair or an androgenous look.

For her it's a sensory thing, she doesn't like feeling her hair on her neck and can't be bothered putting it in a bun everyday. It's super easy to care for and we are never late because she's faffing with it.

My youngest is assumed to be a girl all the time because of his hair. He doesn't care - only even bothers correcting them if it's going to matter - eg. shop assistants doesn't matter, guest PE teacher, he'll correct.

And TBH, even having him, there's another little boy at his school with long blonde hair, and I assumed he was a girl too until someone corrected me. Societal norms are norms.

I had hair of every length when I was a kid. My choice, I found shoulder-length easiest by the time I could brush my hair, because it didn't need frequent cuts and I could tie it back when I needed to and it wasn't too bad to brush.

My DS1 keeps his hair short but is lazy about cuts because he can't be bothered. My DS2 keeps his long (and curly :S ) and hates having it brushed but also refuses to have it cut. On his head be it.

At 4, I think getting it cut helps her understand that she does get to choose how her hair is, that it really doesn't matter, it'll grow back, and she can choose whatever is working for her right now. Although obviously at a 4 year old's level of understanding

My mum used to cut my hair short (in a short back and sides style) when I was little.

Everyone thought I was a boy. Or they’d have to ask.

It’s one of my worst memories of childhood. Feeling so embarrassed because I wasn’t a boy nor did I want to look like one.

I don’t know if not liking having her hair brushed equals her wanting short hair.

Although my son had long hair for years. His first hair cut as at 4. So I guess that’s the same thing. I think people did mistake him for a girl once or twice.

Sorry not the most helpful. But just my thoughts.

DD’s bob got all sweaty around her face and annoyed her so now she has longer hair that we can tie back. I second using conditioner, total game changer and wish my mum had used it on me as I had short but very tangled hair as a kid. Dd is now reluctant to get her hair cut but I think it’s more to do with fear of change. Although saying that, in her Year 2 class all the girls have long hair except for 1 ☹️

I think what your DD wants is important. I'm not really understanding why it wouldn't be an issue is she was a boy, boys should still get to have opinions on their hair length.
My son is 4 and his hair is long and gets tangled, he hates having it brushed but he likes his hair at current length and doesn't want it cut. He may do at some point but at the moment we just use detangler and a small amount of leave in conditioner.

Definitely use the detangler spray game changer. Takes two minutes start from bottom job done, try that first because at least you know managing the longer hair can be easier.

The bobs drove my SIl and DNs nuts,. They are all back to past shoulder length and french braid for school. I appreciate short hair may be easier to brush but that's a tiny part of the day .

Short hair is far easier to look after.

The actual detangle spray works way better then waterd down conditioner. I've used both and still use waterd conditioner for a few days if we run out of detangler before I get to the shop. It dose the job OK, but DD's hair is noticeablely easyer to brush with the proper spray. Asda do an own brand one for £1/2, which works well.

Why is this on the FWR board?

I cannot understand the (almost) fetishisation of girls having long hair. It’s creepy!
Cut it shorter, let her try that for a while. It’ll grow if she decides she doesn’t like it.

Seriously? She is four. Cut it long, cut it short, cut it with a knife and fork. It doesn't matter! Cut it for her comfort and your convenience. She has the rest of her life to express herself through the length of her hair.

My DD had a short crop from 4 - 8 years old. A number 4 buzz cut at 9. Her choice as she hated washing and brushing it. It's a bob now.

I also had (and still have) short hair because of fine curls.

But in the 70s there was only one girl at school with long hair. The rest of us had bobs or shoulder length.

I tried growing mine in my 20s and with great sadness had to admit my mum was right. Stayed short ever since.

Same. I had short hair for years because of the curly

My dd has had a chin length bob and fringe ever since it was long enough to cut - we just find it more practical and it looks chic. She's nearly 4 now and happy not to have it longer as she hates the feeling of having it put up into a plait or ponytail.

This is why my mum got my shoulder length hair cut when I was 5.
I was 24 before I grew it long again.

I wasn’t asked if I wanted it cut and I’d have said no!
And you’re absolutely right about the brushing!
I CANNOT stand when hairdressers COMB out your hair ffs 🤬 I swear I can hear my hair breaking.
I take my own brush and I do it myself.

Bobs are way better. My DD had a pageboy cut at that age, it was very cute.

Conditioner helps make brushing easier. If putting it on is hard, you can dilute with water in a spray bottle to make detangling spray.

My dd had a chin length bob until she understood that regular brushing was a requirement of longer hair. Short hair can be feminine and there’s plenty of accessories that can be worn too.

My daughter has always had a sensory issue with brushing her hair. When she was 5 I told her if she wouldn’t have it brushed she would have to have it cut short. She agreed and had a short bob, which really suited her.

she has since grown her long hair back and we are still struggling with hair brushing. The short hair was much easier to manage as it just didn’t get into such a tangle.

The one thing I would say, having had long hair and also very short hair myself, is that very short hair requires frequent haircuts to stay looking good (like every 6 weeks at most) - how would you and your daughter feel about that? I personally now find mid- length to long hair much easier to look after as it can be left for ages before looking like it needs a cut.

I had a pixie cut age 4/5 in the late 80s and I did look like a boy, partly because children’s clothes then were much less gendered too. I wasn’t allowed to grow it until my mum felt I was old enough to look after it myself. I don’t think I minded that much at the time to be honest though.

I now have a 5 year old of my own with wild fine, curly hair but I’m letting it grow so it can be tied back, although lots of it is only just long enough and tends to spring out of any hairstyle pretty quickly (doing a ‘neat bun’ for ballet exams is er… fun!). I couldn’t afford the constant haircuts if it was short though, and DD is keen on it being long.

@PeonySeasons thank you for being braver than me. It definitely looks like a home hair cut, the Covid flashback was strong🤣