Mixed changing room - is this considered ok these days?

Well quite! SleepyScientist might not be bothered but what if the victim were SS’s son?

Which is why male/female and family change (for parents accompanying their opposite sex children) is safer for all.

Voyeurism Is overwhelmingly a male crime, perverts shouldn’t be given access to women OR children.

This article predates the widespread availability of cheap spy cam equipment, it’s worse now (hence the need for ‘upskirting’ to be made a specific crime): https://womanmeanssomething.com/the-voyeurism-epidemic/

<edit - my quote fell off, this was to sleepyscientist)

You might not mind, but my friend's 15 year old daughter might.
Not some random porn site but spread around school.

Nothing will trump a child being kidnapped/murdered but the risk of that is so much lower than many women/children being traumatised by being photographed/filmed in a changing room.

I never had anyone raise an eyebrow taking DS into ladies loos and changing areas.

That seems unreasonable! Maybe she was having a bad day?

All the leisure centres round here have signs up saying kids older than 8 have to use the appropriate changing room - which of course also makes it clear that kids under 8 are allowed to accompany a parent of the opposite sex.

Little boys have always been allowed in the women's with their mums. I don't think anyone that wants single sex spaces wants little boys banished to the gents?

You'd think.

I remember fist encountering issue with 3 year old Ds in to toilets in shopping center with just me on day out with me and his two sisters - all young and had a woman go apeshit at me - because how dare I bring a male into toilet her teen daughter would be using. I wasn't sending a just barley toilet trained boy in gents in shopping centre by himself and she refused to see why it was a problem.

I thought it odd as I thought above - but spoke to some single friends who encountered similar with young boys from other women - DH said it was an obvious concern when he took DDs out with just him.

It's why many parents prefer mixed sex changing - because it removes worries about encountering situations where you have to send them into public places without you at ages you deem to young - means you don't have to deal with people not wanting even young kids of opposite sex in with you or having different cut off age to you or judging child age widely off mark.

I had hoped that people (especially women) had begun to understand that non-contact sexual offenders cause significant trauma to their victims but apparently I was overly optimistic on that front!

I don't get what fear of murder/kidnap has to do with single sex changing areas.

Little boys have always been allowed in the women's with their mums. I don't think anyone that wants single sex spaces wants little boys banished to the gents?

If women have to shower at home, then we're entitled to a partial refund. We should refuse to pay the same as men for facilities we're expected not to use.

All the times I've gone swimming regularly, it's because it was part of a weekly or daily routine, and I was at the pool before I went on to somewhere else immediately afterwards. This is pretty standard. Lots of women have a swim before work, for example.

Thank you @TheClogLady . Awful to see such minimising of voyeurism. Another person telling women to stop making a fuss about nothing.

Being a victim of voyeurism is actually pretty awful, life changing even. Please don’t minimise what you don’t understand.

Our local pool where I grew up in the 70s/ 80s had a mixed changing village with decent high doors but separate male/ female showers and toilets on the way to the pool. It was fine for me, but I have since realised why other women might hate it and why that set up isn't ideal (plus smartphones didn't exist back then).

Now is been refurbished with horrible mixed showers on the poolside right outside the glass door of the sauna (about 10 feet away). Men sitting inside stare at women showering (possibly not out of ill intent but it made me uncomfortable nonetheless). I need to shower or the chlorine makes me itchy. It's put me off going there tbh.

It's not about the odds of it happening it's the impact it would have. The world isn't going to end if a picture of my boobs ends up on a porn site (tho I don't have that body anymore) but our world would end if someone took DS.

It's all relative I really ain't bothered about pictures or even revenge porn, I worry about DS. I also include picture of DS, AI/editing means an innocent picture can be made into anything anyway.

No.

I could go into detail why this is an absurd idea, but why should I?

Access to showers and adequate changing facilities is part of the bloody expensive! fee structure at swimming pools, and they should be useable for women.

It’s not really practical for non drivers to go home in a dressing gown to shower tho. I’m not getting on a bus like that!

As non driver we threw on clothes walked or bused back then showered - it was a complete none issue in all the locations we've lived in even when we were some distance away.

There often wasn't space under showers at busy times like after swim lesson anyway and as PP says sometime you want to avoid others in mixed showers anyway.

Getting dressed under a towel used to be normal on beaches and in open plan female changing room at my local swimming pool in childhood - it is a workable option. Ideally though choice - male, female and family sized changing facilities for some reason though this doesn't seem to be the modern option most locations go for.

It's a complicated issue, certainly, and I don't want to over-simplify it. However, I do think a lot of GC feminists are suddenly using the "BUT MUSLIMS!" argument to try and advance their cause without properly understanding the people they're suddenly claiming to champion, and the issues they really face.

We're not championing Islam (or Judaism, or other religions the strictest forms of which restrict women's clothing and where they can go). We're trying to open up the world for these women. At the most basic level, they need exercise and a way to get out of the house without a man. We're not pretending to care about the women who are in this position, so please don't dismiss our concerns on their behalf about mixed-sex only facilities.

I'll admit it's been a while since I used local authority pools, but when I did, the changing rooms served all the pools - so a woman might be hoping to attend a women-only swim, but still have to change/shower in the mixed sex changing room if there isn't a single-sex option.

And finally, no - wall-to-wall fully enclosed cubicles are not the answer. A regular poster often raises the issue of safety - a pool user could collapse inside a locked cubicle and no-one might realise anything is wrong until too late.

My local swimming pool is like this. The showers are mixed too. I don’t use it for that reason. I joined a private gym instead.

Any why should women and girls be inconveniences and shoved out of single sex spaces?

All this ‘You can shower at home’ stuff makes me seethe. If I swim in a pool and then don’t wash myself thoroughly in a private showrer within say ten minutes, I get thrush.

MEN can manage with a quick public rinse off then a proper shower 30-40 mins mater at home. Women often can’t because swimming pool water gets up inside us and we’d like to wash it out quickly, in private, thanks.

I don’t know if it’s considered normal but of the three pools within a 40 minute drive I’ve stopped going to two of them because of this. And because one of the pools has shared showers where a teenage boy got an erection watching me rinse off.

I don’t want to swim badly enough to put up with this shit.

Write and complain but not to the pool, to whoever has influence over who is funding the pool eg if your local council provides funds towards it write to them and also your MP.

It’s not really practical for non drivers to go home in a dressing gown to shower tho. I’m not getting on a bus like that!

Or just wear your costume to the pool and use a changing robe after. Or put long t shirt/hoody on over swimming costume, take costume off, put trousers on. Minimal exposure even if someone was looking. You can shower properly at home.

Dmum used to teach us that for the beach - or beach loos - towel under arms tied costume off - pants/trousers/skirt on under towel and then big top - towel off and then sort bra under t-shirt. It's doable.

I have to admit I go swimming with people often at busy times - but suspect I'd be less than happy in mixed changing rooms even well designed ones later at night with fewer people around and at end of session or something with less staff as well even if village is visible from pool because it would feel less safe.

It makes a self imposed limit due to internal risk assessment that I just accept and don't think much about - it would be very location dependent there may be some I'd be happy with.

I used to live in Tower Hamlets and the women-only swimming sessions offered by the council at various places were always popular, with women of all faiths and none. I'm glad they still exist.

mixed changing villages are the norm, yes. When my local pool had a refurb, I was told that all public (e.g council owned) new gym/pools now followed that model rather than split sex. It's also the norm in places like center parcs, bluestone etc. Saying that I've never been to one where the doors were small enough you could see inside cubicles, that's the only bit that sounds strange!

If it's that much of an issue you might find an older pool that is still single sex, or most private ones are. Or just wear your costume to the pool and use a changing robe after. Or put long t shirt/hoody on over swimming costume, take costume off, put trousers on. Minimal exposure even if someone was looking. You can shower properly at home.

I'm more worried about kidnap murder than someone getting a photo of me undressed.

Why? Statistically stranger kidnap and murder is very rare, whilst voyeurism in changing rooms is so common some swimming baths have resorted to building cage type structures over the top of cubicles.

It's actually safer to have a gap at the top and bottom as if it's truly floor to ceiling anything could happen inside without anyone knowing. I'm not bothered and happy to sunbathe topless, mixed sex is great with DS who is 10 as he can go in a separate cubicle but be near us. I would hate to send him into another room as you don't know who is behind the door (male or female), I'm more worried about kidnap murder than someone getting a photo of me undressed.