Please or to access all these features

Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

I give up

60 replies

PullUpTheDrawbridge · 06/04/2024 00:05

FFS I am just so tired of it all. I'm in an unrelated comedy related FB group that is usually light hearted but every now and again, the same old (trans) faces pipe up with their monthly JKR slag-off post. Tonight, for the second month in a row, I gently put my hand up to say not EVERYONE thinks she's bigoted, abusive hate-speaker. Some people think she's standing up for women and children's rights. I got a few likes, but the majority of people took it as a cue to virtue signal their 'be-kind, live-and-let-live, trans-ally' bullshit. I just can't make a dent. Some of the posts are even arguing that GC types are reducing everything to genitals and body stereotypes as if we are the anti feminist ones. I just don't know where to start. Anything you say is immediately hammered down with this sort of bullshit

"This isn't a debate and quite depressing that people are treating it as such, I would hope that fans of XXX would be more progressive as they are. Trans lives aren't a debate. They exist, always have and always will.
Just as society has gone through these moral panics before and targeted communities, it is now happening with the trans community and it is so fucking unacceptable and abhorrent, just as it has been in the past."

"For me it's just the new thing for awful people to hate on. Be who you want to be, as long as you're happy and not hurting anyone it's no one's business but your own. I genuinely don't understand the problem. It amazes me that this is a discussion in our so called 'civilised society"

I'm exhausted with it all. 21K members and I was the only GC voice. What's the point?

I give up
OP posts:
SammyScrounge · 06/04/2024 01:22

Ereshkigalangcleg · 06/04/2024 00:32

I don't know where to start, it's such a big issue. And then you get the emotional 'I just want to exist without hatred' victim posts from trans people and it feels like you're the bad guy kicking a kitten,

That's why they do it, it's manipulative emotional blackmail and makes people turn against you. I'm sorry @PullUpTheDrawbridge, solidarity. We've all been there.

Remember the ones who try to look like abused kittens may well be the ones that send vicious hate mail to their perceived enemies.

MistyGreenAndBlue · 06/04/2024 01:10

Is this an American group? They are definitely a bit behind the UK in seeing through all this. Not all of them of course, but in general.

Although, having said that, it's generational too. The Gen X group I'm on (mostly Americans)largely seem to think it's nonsense.

Australia is very captured too.

lonelywater · 06/04/2024 00:39

just tell them a million quid is up for grabs if they can show anything JKR said which is transphobic. Dont hold your breath.

allmyown · 06/04/2024 00:35

stay strong @PullUpTheDrawbridge xx

Mumoftwo1312 · 06/04/2024 00:35

The people in that Facebook group aren't a representative cross section of society. Don't despair. Mute the group and read the Times instead

MissLucyEyelesbarrow · 06/04/2024 00:35

I feel like my homophobic gran in the corner, who embarrasses everyone.

Which is exactly the point of the forced teaming of LGB with TQ+++. And why self-ID in Ireland got snuck through on the back of abortion rights.

It's hard, OP. Personally, I would not expend social capital on defending JKR, as wonderful as she is, because I want to keep my powder dry for arguments about the medicalisation of children and protecting single sex spaces.

Because of media and social media mis-reporting, it's easy for people to write off JKR as a bigot (wrongly), and apply the same label to anyone who defends her. It is harder for them to argue for keeping rapists inf female prisons or puberty blockers, as evidence of the harms of both emerges.

We have already shifted a long, long way from 7-8 years ago, when it was taboo even to suggest that those harms existed. Don't despair. In the long run, JKR will be proven right and, in the meantime, she has the heart and courage to take the heat.

PaterPower · 06/04/2024 00:33

Judging by the two posts you’ve screenshotted, they’re not thinking for themselves. They’re just parroting the mindless drivel they’ve been fed on SM.

It’s like listening to a politician doing anything he or she can to avoid addressing the points being put to them.

Lots of waffle, most of it either completely untrue or irrelevant to the issue at hand, designed to elicit a conditioned response (in this case, “beeee kind”).

Ereshkigalangcleg · 06/04/2024 00:32

I don't know where to start, it's such a big issue. And then you get the emotional 'I just want to exist without hatred' victim posts from trans people and it feels like you're the bad guy kicking a kitten,

That's why they do it, it's manipulative emotional blackmail and makes people turn against you. I'm sorry @PullUpTheDrawbridge, solidarity. We've all been there.

PullUpTheDrawbridge · 06/04/2024 00:20

I know. It just feels so entrenched. Saying otherwise feels akin to being racist or something.

I don't know where to start, it's such a big issue. And then you get the emotional 'I just want to exist without hatred' victim posts from trans people and it feels like you're the bad guy kicking a kitten,

How do people talk about this stuff? I feel like my homophobic gran in the corner, who embarrasses everyone.

OP posts:
HereForTheFreeLunch · 06/04/2024 00:14

Be who you want to be, as long as you're happy and not hurting anyone it's no one's business

But they are hurting women and girls - those who miss out on sports places, medals and prize money, those who get trapped and abused in a women's prison, those who got molested and taped in girls toilets.. so it becomes our business to keep men out of female spaces - however they may dress.