New Abigail Shrier book

I don't think she is saying that there is no such thing as trauma at all, but that it's not the most inevitable or maybe even most common response to bad events, much less the normal difficult things all people go through. The normal or usual outcome is that people get through these things and gain resilience. Because resilience comes from going through the difficult things.

We've moved to a belief system that sees even normal things as resulting in trauma, and this drives a lot of the parenting decisions people make.

'I'm not sure why it can't be both?? That even resilient adults might well have some past trauma they might want to address?"

Hard agree with this @theremustbecake - it's not either/or. I do believe some painful memories can become repressed via disassotian (an entirely valid adaptation) and that dis-ease can manifest in the body.

I do agree with her on the over medicalisation of childhood experience and the impact gentle parenting is having on building resilience more broadly. Her convo with Jordan Peterson is worth a listen. He has some very interesting observations about the rise of only-children/older parents and the pressure "to get it right"

I'm reading it now and finding it very interesting. Some of the examples are very extreme, but is it because it's in America? Like kids having to learn about inclusion during maths class. Or being subjected to talk therapy whether they need it or not.

I'm a bit confused on her long chapters on trauma residing in the body though (or not as she says). From what I understand, she's saying on-going trauma from childhood doesn't exist, and people are resilient. I'm not sure why it can't be both?? That even resilient adults might well have some past trauma they might want to address? I'm also not sure how it's relevant because Gabor Mate's stuff is about adults tackling their own pasts (self-help guide), whereas this book is supposed to be about how best to raise kids. But I suppose people can interpret it all as an excuse to blame everything on someone else, which I don't think it was supposed to be interpreted as.

Anyhow, def good to read, I'm very much the gentle parent so I'd quite like to hear the another view. It's always good to understand all sides of a debate and decide from there.