Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

Not allowed to have GC views at home by so-called “DH “ - so left ! Hand hold please ….

65 replies

HowdidImanagetohavetwoaccountaandthenloseboth · 18/02/2024 20:27

We had a row today so right now I am lying in bed in a nearby hotel having left .

Background
We have an adult autistic daughter who lives with us gradually being indoctrinated online by trans views . She changed her name several years ago outside the home . She has become increasingly pro trans ideas, To be honest I am terrified she will start purchasing hormones online to attempt to create a pre pubescent self to compliment her desire to be pan sexual .

DH is very conflict adverse . He wants to stifle any of my GC views for fear of upsetting DD . With the result of course that all she is exposed to is the clap trap she accesses online.
He himself appears to be GC or at least occasionally agrees with me so seems so . He’s a live and key live sort of character.

That would be fine if we weren’t experiencing the effects of it. I hate the way it is affecting our lives and sometimes I can’t help exclaiming at something which riles me like today , when I saw one of his works instructions regarding email signatures . Very trans as you might gather.

So I exclaimed something and was immediately silenced . He says it’s affecting his mental health .

I couldn’t stand it any longer , not being allowed to say anything , being stifled , any views I have pushed to the side lest they upset someone .

I caught the train and here I am . Brought enough medication for 24 hours . I have sent him an email after I got here setting out why I was upset but haven’t had a reply .

OP posts:
Original poster
HowdidImanagetohavetwoaccountaandthenloseboth · 18/02/2024 20:54

I just felt sick watching that first video . Stomached about 10 minutes then had to stop .

OP posts:
cariadlet · 18/02/2024 20:47

This takes a strong stomach. It includes a photo of a phalloplasty arm.
twitter.com/KaeleyT/status/1641830373704478720?t=Z__wxATxpqQyFOCWHtGh4Q&s=19

cariadlet · 18/02/2024 20:45

Detransitioner talking about the damage caused by binders.
twitter.com/detransaqua/status/1661177772016820225?t=h5B5CDaZPfWMSM7uec0HLQ&s=19

cariadlet · 18/02/2024 20:44

@HowdidImanagetohavetwoaccountaandthenloseboth
Get your dh to watch this video.
twitter.com/Kearns_Richard_/status/1680188067989057538?t=ZlluXdNV0XTKwmB7cOb7og&s=19

anythinginapinch · 18/02/2024 20:41

He's able to adopt a "live and let live" approach because so far nothing has challenged his own rights and privileges. He's able to ignore /avoid this issue because it IS marginal to him. Until now. Until your strength of feeling and insistence on this being an issue
That matters, has intruded on his home comforts and his easy sense of self as a loving supportive dad to your DD.
He's no different to far too many "nice" men. It's easy to be "nice" when the price of being "not nice" is always, always paid by the other person. I'm so sorry I have no advice. You must be suffering. I'm sorry

Original poster
HowdidImanagetohavetwoaccountaandthenloseboth · 18/02/2024 20:41

HoneyButterPopcorn · 18/02/2024 20:38

Send him details of what happens to these girls medically and surgically. Include health and MH outcomes of girls who have been ‘socially’ transitioned onto those who have gone the medical route - a lifelong patient. Ask if that’s what he wants for his child.

thanks , have you got any links you could let me have ?

OP posts:
HoneyButterPopcorn · 18/02/2024 20:38

Send him details of what happens to these girls medically and surgically. Include health and MH outcomes of girls who have been ‘socially’ transitioned onto those who have gone the medical route - a lifelong patient. Ask if that’s what he wants for his child.

StephanieSuperpowers · 18/02/2024 20:38

I think potentially allowing your DD to sterilise herself to avoid conflict is fairly weak parenting and he needs to think carefully about whether he's prepared to have the conflict now - or after she realises what she's been enabled to do (should the worst case scenario happen).

Emotionalsupportviper · 18/02/2024 20:38

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

The balanced and non-judgemental parent is the one currently sleeping in a hotel.

The one at home is the cowardly indulgent one who will do anything for a quiet, non-confrontational life.

Refusing to face difficulties is not mature parenting.

Emotionalsupportviper · 18/02/2024 20:35

I wish I could suggest how to cope with this, but I honestly don't know.

Does your DH realise how close your DD is to perhaps doing something that could destroy her physical (and mental) health if she continues down this route?

That she might actually begin wearing a binder, or even have surgery, destroying her healthy body?

And how horribly it would affect her if she does, and then later realises that she has made a dreadful and irreversible mistake?

It is worth getting some real-life account (eg Keira Bell's) for him to read so that he can see how vulnerable people with autism are to this seductive cult that promises them so much- "follow us and life will suddenly become easy as you become your authentic self" - and yet actually gives so little?

I feel for you - I can't imagine how distressed you must be.

Original poster
HowdidImanagetohavetwoaccountaandthenloseboth · 18/02/2024 20:35

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 18/02/2024 20:30

This is really difficult for you, I can imagine. Luckily, my DH is GC too but doesn’t voice it as much as I do. I can imagine your DH feels a bit stuck between you and his DD. Does your DD know how you feel about it all?

She does now sadly !I was upset before I left and she saw .

OP posts:
Karensalright · 18/02/2024 20:34

@Pifflepafflewifflewaffle

Well that is such a nasty judgy thing to say, your user name suits you.

HowdidImanagetohavetwoaccountaandthenloseboth · 18/02/2024 20:34

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Pifflepafflewifflewaffle · 18/02/2024 20:31

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 18/02/2024 20:30

This is really difficult for you, I can imagine. Luckily, my DH is GC too but doesn’t voice it as much as I do. I can imagine your DH feels a bit stuck between you and his DD. Does your DD know how you feel about it all?

Swipe left for the next trending thread