Avanti trains tonedeaf menopause insult

Well how do they know when to give then? Reach 40 and you get one?

We can't really ask for support for these reasons and then complain when
(as in this case) other women find some humour in it, and so perpetuate it.

I can 😀 Some jokes we only make among ourselves. Twee or not, this kind of "humour" is not for a professional workplace setting. Then it becomes a putdown.

FFS

I'm their target demographic.
I hate it.
So many patronising assumptions.

Clearly designed by some bright, young, (probably male) thing - the type of person like my friend's like manager who asked her if she had anything fun planned for the time she was signed off sick after her emergency hysterectomy.

I'm all for raising menopause awareness amongst managers. Recognition of potential health problems, poor sleep etc and associated work adjustments such as flexible working. I am all not for landfill filling, twee crap like this.

I can see both sides.

Yeah me too, really.

Although I do think giving a jelly baby to a menopausal woman so she doesn't bite your own head off is a little like, oh, ignore her mood, she's on her period.

The thing is, you're fucked either way, because of sexism.

Support is good, but the publicity leads to discrimination.

But, long time, that just has to be dealt with. Like every other biological issue women face.

I stand by my comment that it's shit because it helps perpetuate the stereotype that menopausal women are irrational and emotional.

And I agree.

The problem with menopause (and this is a bit of a tangent) is that women are asking employers for support and recognition because menopause does make them vulnerable and make them struggle at times.

And as in this case, women do tend to perpetuate this view. There will be thousands of posts on Mumsnet over the years, where women feel that they're losing their minds during menopause. Having violent mood swings etc.

We can't really ask for support for these reasons and then complain when (as in this case) other women find some humour in it, and so perpetuate it.

As I say, I dislike it. But I'm struggling to make a logical argument to say that it's wrong.

I guess it was created by someone why hasn’t had menopausal horrors.

the rage, the memory loss, the draining exhaustion, insomnia, depression, general feeling of crappiness…

it seems to trivialise it ‘there there dear’ like when you see ads for period products ‘aww you just need some choccy and a hot water bottle’.

but then I’m unwell myself and ready to rip anyone’s head off who trivialises my symptoms!

It is part of a much wider and well-used package of support provided by Avanti West Coast as part of our commitment to be a proud Menopause Friendly Employer.

A lot of menopausal and perimenopausal women on this site and elsewhere that I've spoken to don't like this new focus on the menopause, as rightly or wrongly they feel it undermines the position of women in the workplace and elsewhere. Just because it was designed by a woman doesn't necessarily make it appropriate for other women. I can see both sides.

"A lot of women like twee humour". Twee gets a hard time on Mumsnet. MumsNet humour tends to be more, um, robust.

Shouldn't the bag include free inco pads and a subscription to Squezy?

(I'll get my coat)

I think it depends on how the recipients of the bag were selected. Handed out to any female employees of a certain age would be offensive. Made available to a self selected group of women attending a menopause support group is fine.

This is how misinformation spreads, FFS. If have thought better of Mumsnetters.

To be fair, I first saw this because of a tweet from the union and I stand by my comment that it's shit because it helps perpetuate the stereotype that menopausal women are irrational and emotional.

It’s the gift version of ‘Calm down, dear’.

It’s so stereotyping, like saying all women eat ice cream and chocolate, and cry continuously when they have a period.

Of course. I seem to be surrounded by twee rubbish these days and I'm allergic.

But the context is important and it turns out that all the assumptions on here (it's all they're doing about menopause/it must be a stupid man's idea) are wrong.

It’s still a twee piece of rubbish.

It seems Avanti staff get both.

It's not an either/or if you read the link. Which virtually no-one on this thread seems to be arsed enough to do.

This is how misinformation spreads, FFS. If have thought better of Mumsnetters.

I’d rather just get an email saying ‘if you need time off or any support, speak to HR’

An Avanti West Coast spokesperson said: 'This is a gift bag designed and created by our own in-house Menopause Support Group and derived from a suggestion from a colleague based on her own personal experience

For @ThePoshUns

As a post-menopausal woman, I can't get worked up about this. I wouldn't mind receiving it. We are in danger of becoming a damned if you do, damned if you don't culture.

Why is no-one reading either of the links supplied? It was a female employee's idea.

Let's face it, a distressing number of women like twee humour. It's not a man thing usually.

If you look three or four posts about yours (or Avanti's response in the link in the OP ) you will read the context. If you do, you will find that you're last sentence is absolutely addressed within them, and that that sort is available to their employees.

Patronising, virtue signalling. Would be interesting to know the sex/ age of whoever signed that off.

It’s given as part of a programme of drop in events, that people appear to choose to go to. The events are part of wider menopause guidance and support developed by the company

Yep, I'm glad I read both links. This has clearly been blown out of proportion. It's a little giveaway for attendees at an event. Nothing more. It's absolutely not to my taste, but Avanti is being unfairly slated here. They're clearly addressing menopause issues properly, which is not then most employers are. So trying to take them down over a little freebie is unfair.

I hate twee things like this. But on reading the link...

An Avanti West Coast spokesperson said: 'This is a gift bag designed and created by our own in-house Menopause Support Group and derived from a suggestion from a colleague based on her own personal experience. It is part of a much wider and well-used package of support provided by Avanti West Coast as part of our commitment to be a proud Menopause Friendly Employer.

'Over the course of the last year, Avanti West Coast has undertaken a wide range of menopause support initiatives including launching guidance for colleagues and managers, creating a support group on internal channels – which is a safe space for women to chat and seek support around menopause and perimenopause as well as setting up specialist library, giving staff free access to books on the subject.'

So it's not just a giveaway with nothing behind it, and no the idea didn't come from a man.

It’s given as part of a programme of drop in events, that people appear to choose to go to. The events are part of wider menopause guidance and support developed by the company. God knows, like anyone who has to use their trains, I’m no fan of Avanti (and I’d find the gift a bit twee tbh) but the confected outrage at this seems a bit overblown
Once more…
https://newsdesk.avantiwestcoast.co.uk/news/avanti-west-coast-supports-colleagues-affected-by-menopause-with-drop-in-session

I'd like a few moments with whoever thought this up. To misquote Blackadder:
...."believe me, Satan and all his hellish implements of torture will be nothing compared to 10 minutes with me and this pencil (which you so kindly supplied)."

Bet it's not even a full sized pencil, just one of those stubby ones you used to get in Argos......

The text was amusing but not remotely appropriate for a national organisation. Their culture needs a bit of a shake up or at the least their marketing department.