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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

At a societal level

61 replies

pickledandpuzzled · 05/12/2023 07:01

I think we have been thinking about safeguarding wrong. We design it on the basis that a small minority of people are predatory monsters, and everyone else is ok.

Observation suggests that many people are uninterested in the agency of others, and given the opportunity will use others for their benefit. Other people are possessions, trophies, staff.

The article below suggests a huge proportion of men will offend if they can get away with it.

How should we structure safeguarding, if that’s the case? What will a safe society look like, and how do we reach it?

https://apple.news/ArOEhJbJ1R1GNjarVdZJuEQ

Shocking survey reveals how many men would abuse child if ‘no one found out’ — The Independent

The world’s largest sexual abuse perpretation prevention survey revealed a number of ‘concerning’ patterns

https://apple.news/ArOEhJbJ1R1GNjarVdZJuEQ

OP posts:
pronounsbundlebundle · 05/12/2023 10:02

I got interrupted -so have edited my post - but to add I'd say a 'culture of safeguarding' could be seen as contextual safeguarding.

In my experience it doesn't happen because all too often people who speak up lose their jobs or suffer a penalty, even if just social.

I did some safeguarding training recently and pointed out that in the case examples given in every case the person who whistleblew / did something had nothing to lose... e.g. the taxi driver with Victoria Climbie but there were other examples e.g. a teenage girl who whistleblew when she was doing volunteering - though no doubt it was scary her parents were incredibly supportive and she didn't risk homelessness from losing her job / inability to get another job.

Beowulfa · 05/12/2023 09:54

We design it on the basis that a small minority of people are predatory monsters, and everyone else is ok.

OP, could I check what you mean here please? My understanding of safeguarding comes from being DBS checked for RDA coaching, where the vast majority of volunteers are middle aged/retired females. Nobody, including sweet grey haired old ladies, gets an exemption. So technically the safeguarding assumes that anyone can be not ok. Do you mean we should be thinking more pro-actively about levels of suspicion?

pronounsbundlebundle · 05/12/2023 09:48

There is a thing called contexual safeguarding. Dr Carlene Firmin has done work on this. I think her work is mostly around environments - physical environments e.g. school stairways. It seems this could be extended into social environments.

In theory there's supposed to be a 'culture of safeguarding' in good schools etc but in reality this can easily not happen in my experience. It sort of goes against human nature in many ways - the avoidance of difficult situations and the social consequences of speaking up which all on this board know about all too well. The problem is safeguarding systems do indeed seem to be built around the individual bad actor and the individual terrible circumstance.

Villagetoraiseachild · 05/12/2023 09:43

Thanks Op for posting this, with the article. Interesting and disturbing research , particularly the part about high earning married men who work with children....
The more knowledge there is that helps break the cycle, the better

HagoftheNorth · 05/12/2023 09:05

Also marking to come back to later. Really interesting question Pickled

Igmum · 05/12/2023 08:55

OMG this is vile. And yes to a man free island.

stealtheatingtunnocks · 05/12/2023 08:51

Yes, a bit of shame is a useful tool for society. Mind you, even Japan has lost control of men, that’s the most polite and manner driven society I can think of.

porn is a problem. It has become insidious.

PomegranateOfPersephone · 05/12/2023 08:51

Also on my way to work but I want to save this for later. I will be interested to see if it stands given that two other threads on safeguarding were removed yesterday.

Briefly, I have always worked in areas requiring a high level of safeguarding training and I have understood that we should always think, it could happen here, it could be anyone of us, and it is everyone’s responsibility so the same strict rules apply to all members of staff.

pickledandpuzzled · 05/12/2023 07:31

It’s a compelling argument against anarchy, that’s for sure.

It seems we really need societal structures and norms. All the repressive stuff of the past that we threw out, turned out to be offering some protective functions. We accidentally threw out the baby, too.

Do we need to move away from individualism and towards a utilitarian approach? The best outcome for the most people?

I haven’t studied sociology, women’s studies or feminism, or even done proper reading on it. Someone will be along shortly talking about third wave or liberal Feminism or whatever. I don’t know any of that.

OP posts:
stealtheatingtunnocks · 05/12/2023 07:16

Can we just move to a man-free island? I say that as a straight woman and mother of sons.

im surrounds by nice men, good men. But this? I don’t think women ever understand man’s capacity for depravity. We are shocked by behaviour in Ukraine and Misdle east, but it would happen here if society broke down.

Catsanfan · 05/12/2023 07:05

That is truly horrendous. I've got to get up for work but will revisit this thread later.