DD feeling bad after mis-gendering sub teacher.

Your child made a mistake.

She thought the teacher was male but they were actually a woman.

Yes it’s embarrassing for her but no worse than calling the teacher mum, which so many students do.

You being pissed off that she was corrected (no staying after class or detention or any other sanctions) is an extreme overreaction.

Read my whole reply. I literally said, right there, “the snapping is obviously not okay” :)

I don’t understand your point about respect at all, what I have said in the part you have highlighted, is quite simply to respect how other people want to label themselves even if you disagree with it personally. That’s got nothing to do with me not respecting myself, it makes no difference to my day to day life whatsoever, but just like I wouldn’t call you “emily” if you ask me to call you “jade”, I wouldn’t call someone Mr if they introduced themselves as Miss.

As I said in my first reply, they should have introduced themselves to a new class- all of my teachers always did, and they shouldn’t have snapped.

Some of the boys in my RE class used to do this to a female teacher, because she had a bit of a moustache. They were doing it to be cruel. She used to ignore them, which was probably the best thing to do.
You need to get to the bottom of the context.

What a silly person. First, they jolly well should have introduced their self- “hi I am Miss Sub, apologies for not being your usual teacher”.
Second, subs get called much worse things than “sir”.
Third, some of us xx women have big hands, broad shoulders and narrow hips. I look like I’m in drag if i wear feminine clothes, but honestly don’t mind if anyone calls me « sir ».

When I had short hair I had a 4 year old in My preschool class called me Mr for almost two years. I just laughed and let mom know about it. No big deal. Teacher over reacted

No more than claiming a teacher ‘looks like a man’ even though they’ve said they’re a woman and no other student called them sir.

@Night409 well that's incredibly transphobic. There's no right or wrong way to present if you're trans, which I'm surprised you don't know!

If this was a trans man/woman, they would have said their pronouns at the beginning of the class.

They would also be dressed very feminine/masculine.

They would also be called sir by multiple students, not just DD.

It would be easy to find out the name of the sub and whether it’s Mr or Mrs but apparently OP and her DD don’t know it.

But yes carry on being gullible and believing that this story is real.🙄

I know that its not aimed at me, but teachers generally don't bother with responses or corrections they just get on with the job of teaching.

Its only become a thing since TRAs have entered the classroom.

I agree that you might not be able to tell from a photo, and even a short, well edited video. But have honestly NEVER not been able to tell after being in someone's company for any length of time (by that I mean at least 30 minutes). So yes, fleetingly a teenager might be confused, but men who socially transition as adults are not hard to spot, and women who look 'masculine' also have mannerisms and 'tells' that pretty much everyone deciphers. If people politely pretend not to, that still doesn't mean they don't know, just that they went along with the pretence.

A full lesson in, I'm pretty sure OP's dd was perfectly aware of the teacher's sex.

Errr.... think you are being a bit provocative here??

I echo the posters recommending doing nothing unless your dd actually gets into trouble. I suspect there won't be any follow up. If there is, then I would be contacting the school.

I don't think a 14 Yr old is going to be mistaken about a person's sex after being taught by them for a whole lesson, so I see no reason to disbelieve your dd saying it was a man. Often people make mistakes in quick encounters, but not for the course of an hour long interaction.

If he/she looks like a bloke then she is going to get called sir or Mr. Another Arthur or Martha.

Yes because when a man says he's a woman we must all believe them and not the evidence of our own eyes or those of our daughters. 🙄

Quite,then they could just call him Brian.

a) It depends on the behaviour policy of the school
b) It depends if the supply teacher has actually read the behaviour policy in the 20-30 minutes between being phoned with an address and turning up ready to work.

Edit: Sorry misunderstood the question as the antecedents were confusing. Thought you meant why didn't the teacher write the child's name on the board as a form of behaviour management (as it's a common one).

But the teacher said they were female.

So it just sounds like they are a biological woman but your DD thought they looked masculine and said sir.

When I was a teacher I used to get called "sir" "miss" "mum" and even "dad" once. It was not because children were misidentifying my sex. It was because sometimes they blurt out random shit when they're in a rush or on the spot, for example when they really want to be the first to tell you the answer to something. As a teacher it's a basic professional standard to not take it personally.

Why didn’t the teacher just write their name on the board?

I'm.a female teacher who gets called sir all the time, I don't look like a man it's just automatic.

Forgetting for the moment the red herring that this may, in fact be a female (I doubt it), then I don't agree @Mrsttcno1 that the child should be forced to call the teacher what they want to be called.

Compelled speech should be banned in schools. Children should not be forced to go along with a teacher's gender illusions.

She was being taught by a man and should not feel bad about this. She will not get into trouble.

The point is that she wasn't just corrected, she was "snapped" at.

But whether you like it or not the world is changing, and I don’t think it’s a hugely onerous task to teach children to just respect how other people want to label themselves regardless of whether you agree or disagree with it.

But whose respect comes first? Especially when those making the most noise are the ones labelling other people.
Respect goes both ways.