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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Death of the “rough sex” defence…

44 replies

NitroNine · 04/11/2023 11:53

Over in NI a judge has halted a bail application after a man accused of choking a woman announced in court: “She likes rough sex and being strangled”. (Link archived at archive.ph)

In July 2022 the law in England & Wales was strengthened to remove the so-called “rough sex defence”. Northern Ireland actually got there a few months earlier, abolishing that line of defence is a specific provision of the Justice (Sexual Offences and Trafficking Victims) Bill of April 2022. Scotland has not brought forward any such legislation nor is there any plan to. Worryingly, the FM doesn’t seem to understand that prior to the legislative changes the rest of the UK had laws by which one could not consent to harm, yet the rough sex defence was rolling merrily through the Courts.

Seeing a judge shut down an abusive man so completely - especially in the part of the UK with the worst DV rates - is heartening. It would be even better if Scotland would get on board with the rest of the UK & accept the need to legislate the abhorrent “rough sex defence” out of existence. It’s quite something that women are STILL having to campaign to get their murders/manslaughters recognised.

Tyrone man accused of choking and assaulting woman has bail application halted after court ‘outburst’

A judge has halted a bail application after a man accused of choking a female announced in court: “She likes rough sex and being strangled”.

https://m.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/courts/tyrone-man-accused-of-choking-and-assaulting-woman-has-bail-application-halted-after-court-outburst/a1291122889.html

OP posts:
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StressyMcStressFace · 04/11/2023 17:54

One of the few things we got right 😌

Dogknowsbest · 04/11/2023 17:51

Maaate · 04/11/2023 14:34

Usually when this topic comes up we get a few "women" telling us how much they love it.

Cool, crack on with it if that's what genuinely floats your boat, just know that if it does go wrong there will be consequences.

There is something about it. I've never gone the whole way with this but I love a little bit of pressure being applied to my neck during sex. In saying this, I'm pleased and agree with the movement. I'm sure tons of rapists get away with it because of this defence.

In BDSM relationships it's always meant to be the sub that's in control not the dom so it's not even remotely conflicting.

AlphaTransWoman · 04/11/2023 17:39

There are some people out there who enjoy auto-asphyxiation, and very sadly it occasionally costs them their lives when they try it on their own and things go horribly wrong. Anyone experiencing such feelings should be encouraged to get help for their own safety.

I'm very glad the law has changed as it's obvious nobody could give meaningful consent to being treated in that manner by someone else.

WFTCHTJ · 04/11/2023 17:25

That wouldn't surprise me, but that doesn't explain why people do it to themselves.

UtopiaPlanitia · 04/11/2023 16:59

WFTCHTJ · 04/11/2023 14:10

Not my thing but I'm told the oxygen deprivation gives you a buzz

I believe a certain type of man gets off on the act of strangling and hurting a woman - it’s a sadism/power and 'complete failure to see women as human beings' thing.

RoseBucket · 04/11/2023 14:37

There is also a similar campaign planned in England this month, I think it starts on the 16th. I can check the date when at work tonight.

Maaate · 04/11/2023 14:34

LakeTiticaca · 04/11/2023 13:59

Call me old fashioned but does anyone actually ever enjoy being strangled during sex?
I've heard of auto erotic asphyxiation but I don't understand what would be erotic about it

Usually when this topic comes up we get a few "women" telling us how much they love it.

Cool, crack on with it if that's what genuinely floats your boat, just know that if it does go wrong there will be consequences.

WFTCHTJ · 04/11/2023 14:10

Not my thing but I'm told the oxygen deprivation gives you a buzz

LakeTiticaca · 04/11/2023 13:59

Call me old fashioned but does anyone actually ever enjoy being strangled during sex?
I've heard of auto erotic asphyxiation but I don't understand what would be erotic about it

NitroNine · 04/11/2023 13:51

The ad campaign is really powerful Boots, thanks for sharing it - I’m in That London so I keep my BelTel subscription, but miss out on things like that.

As you say Utopia, it’s something for NI to be really proud of. (Bit confused by Bill apparently coming into force in June when received Royal Assent in April, but 🤷‍♀️)

OP posts:
ArthurbellaScott · 04/11/2023 13:49

Heartening. Thanks, OP.

itsmylife7 · 04/11/2023 13:38

A step in the right direction.

TooBigForMyBoots · 04/11/2023 13:33

It's a great campaign. No victim blaming, no putting the onus on women and no ambiguity. It's a direct messag to men, do this and you've committed a crime.

YouJustDoYou · 04/11/2023 13:28

At least it's a step forward. Scotland is barbaric in the way it treats women.

UtopiaPlanitia · 04/11/2023 13:26

TooBigForMyBoots · 04/11/2023 13:07

There's also a TV and billboard campaign here, telling men it's no defence.

https://www.google.co.uk/amp/s/uk.news.yahoo.com/amphtml/watch-northern-ireland-tv-campaign-090532946.html

Thanks for that info Boots, it makes for interesting and hopeful reading

UtopiaPlanitia · 04/11/2023 13:02

Thanks for that heartening information Nitro; it’s not often that I get to feel relieved at officialdom in N Ireland and its attitude to women.

popebishop · 04/11/2023 12:42

Absolutely! Thanks for the update.

AlphaTransWoman · 04/11/2023 11:58

That's a huge step towards a more civilized society.

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