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Lurking Merkins - Volume Two of Under the Duvet of Darkness

314 replies

Boiledbeetle · 04/11/2023 08:00

"Under the Duvet of Darkness Volume Two Lurking Merkins" is now live on Amazon.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0CMJZ43VZ

This a thread about a book about a thread about a book about a thread! (I think I’ve got the correct number of books and threads in there)

There are over 160 poems written by over 40 different Mumsnet usernames contained within its 208 pages.

There are also 12 Lurking Merkin poems lurking throughout the book!

It can take a few days for it to become fully searchable so the link below will take you straight to it:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0CMJZ43VZ

It's available worldwide so if anyone needs the link for a site other than the UK let me know and I can give you the link to the relevant Amazon site.

IMPORTANT BIT:

Whilst written entirely by Mumsnet users this book is not, I repeat NOT, published with Mumsnet’s express permission or co-operation.

It is published with the express permission and co-operation of the individual writers themselves.

Can anyone who tweets about it link directly to the book on Amazon or my Twitter profile:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0CMJZ43VZ
or
https://twitter.com/TheBoiledbeetle

rather than to this MN thread.

Thank you everyone who let me use their poems, without you there would be no book!

Boiledbeetle XX

Lurking Merkins - Volume Two of Under the Duvet of Darkness
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Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/11/2023 11:05

Oh my! Firstly... Oh my god they are beautiful (and i don't mean the books, although I do like them as well) I'll swap you a long haired old smelly cat for them! Maybe not he's just glared at me, I think he knows what I typed!

Secondly love the photos!! 😻😻

I'm off to do an animal book tweet!

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TessoftheDurbeyfields · 08/11/2023 10:53

In the first picture she is definitely v cross after reading the poems 😆

TessoftheDurbeyfields · 08/11/2023 10:52

Here are some pictures - they can definitely read 😸

Lurking Merkins - Volume Two of Under the Duvet of Darkness
Lurking Merkins - Volume Two of Under the Duvet of Darkness
Lurking Merkins - Volume Two of Under the Duvet of Darkness
Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/11/2023 09:39

TessoftheDurbeyfields · 08/11/2023 08:50

I will experiment and post the results!

Best way is to put the book somewhere they sit. Say I'll read that when I've made a cup of tea. Go make a cup of tea and on return to the living room a cat will be sat on the book!

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TessoftheDurbeyfields · 08/11/2023 08:50

I will experiment and post the results!

Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/11/2023 08:17

I insist you smear the disgusting stuff in the tube all over the front of your brand new book and take photos of the cats licking it off!

I think Dreamies may be the better option though! 😸

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TessoftheDurbeyfields · 08/11/2023 08:08

It may require a bit of bribery with Dreamies or Lick-e-Lix 😸

TessoftheDurbeyfields · 08/11/2023 08:07

Ooh I could put some pictures on here of my very beautiful cats (I am obviously biased😆) sitting on the books that you are v welcome to use on Twitter

Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/11/2023 07:06

Volume 2 had now got a frequently bought together thingy!

😁

Lurking Merkins - Volume Two of Under the Duvet of Darkness
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Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 07/11/2023 23:04

And I'm falling asleep so today's figures:

it's been a low one today 3 new 1 old. But any sales is better than none!

If anyone has Twitter accounts any retweeting of my book related posts would be appreciated. Or your own tweets with photos of poems on etc.

Too many just coming from me and people will start to ignore them!

Although I may post @CyclingSam rabbit eating book photo tomorrow and see if I can pick up some animal lover clicks!

Lurking Merkins - Volume Two of Under the Duvet of Darkness
Lurking Merkins - Volume Two of Under the Duvet of Darkness
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Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 07/11/2023 22:55

Waitwhat23 · 07/11/2023 22:48

Right now I'd rather have my arse rubbed with a brick!

😆 nicely put!

I have a way with words!

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Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 07/11/2023 22:54

CervixSampler · 07/11/2023 22:39

A certain AIBU thread invaded by the kind posters have given me the rage today but I'm too tired to give it any more headspace. It's bedtime. It's Robert Galbraith time. Thank everything holy for the escapism of the wonderful JKR.

DD's headteacher is very impressed with her achievement of being published. I think she's told her dad. That will be interesting if he reads the book although not likely. 🎶you're so vain. You probably think this poem's about you. You're so vain 🎶 It's his current gf that needs to read it.

Anyway...a third book? A third?? Surely we need to find a supply of Valium/tea/Tunnocks/all 3 for Boiledbeetle if so!

I did see you'd put a link in to the book 😍 I imagine people clicked on that then came back to posts of me swearing all over the place! I'm not sure if that will have helped or hindered sales!!

Does DDs head teacher know what sort of poetry she wrote and what sort of book it was in? (Secretly hopes she led with it's no 1 in political and protest poetry!)

I've just shoved a Tunnocks Tea Cake in my gob!

OP posts:
Waitwhat23 · 07/11/2023 22:48

Right now I'd rather have my arse rubbed with a brick!

😆 nicely put!

CervixSampler · 07/11/2023 22:39

A certain AIBU thread invaded by the kind posters have given me the rage today but I'm too tired to give it any more headspace. It's bedtime. It's Robert Galbraith time. Thank everything holy for the escapism of the wonderful JKR.

DD's headteacher is very impressed with her achievement of being published. I think she's told her dad. That will be interesting if he reads the book although not likely. 🎶you're so vain. You probably think this poem's about you. You're so vain 🎶 It's his current gf that needs to read it.

Anyway...a third book? A third?? Surely we need to find a supply of Valium/tea/Tunnocks/all 3 for Boiledbeetle if so!

Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 07/11/2023 22:36

Swashbuckled · 07/11/2023 21:38

Did someone up thread say they were writing for the third volume 🤨.

Reading it tonight made me crack another one out. So, you know, if there is a third….@Boiledbeetle

It’s the rage that inspires me; the fucking rage, I tell you.

Sticks fingers in ears

La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la

Sorry did you say something i can't hear you with all the la la la ing going on.

All I can say is that any poems posted are posted on the understanding that if there was ever to be a volume three they would end up in it.

Of course at this moment in time I have no intention of ever writing or editing another poem ever again! But then I felt exactly the same after volume one and look how that turned out!

Right now I'd rather have my arse rubbed with a brick! Especially as Ive still got to check through the e-book version of volume two once I get it from FairyKindleMother. However I don't know when that will be as FKM is currently dealing with something serious that is outside of her control and that is way way more important than an e-book. So I still haven't finished with volume 2 yet!

But rage does make for good poems and I don't think we are past the rage stage of this whole shit show yet!

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Swashbuckled · 07/11/2023 21:38

Did someone up thread say they were writing for the third volume 🤨.

Reading it tonight made me crack another one out. So, you know, if there is a third….@Boiledbeetle

It’s the rage that inspires me; the fucking rage, I tell you.

Swashbuckled · 07/11/2023 21:11

And, of course, it links nicely with the cover too ☺️

Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 07/11/2023 21:05

Swashbuckled · 07/11/2023 21:03

@Boiledbeetle

You’re right! I noticed that when I first cracked it open but then got lost in all the other thoughts.

Yes, it is a good frame to our words! (Genius editing 😊)

I was quite impressed i managed to bring it full circle back to where we started!

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Swashbuckled · 07/11/2023 21:03

@Boiledbeetle

You’re right! I noticed that when I first cracked it open but then got lost in all the other thoughts.

Yes, it is a good frame to our words! (Genius editing 😊)

Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 07/11/2023 20:39

Swashbuckled · 07/11/2023 20:18

Wow!

I’ve been dipping in and opening at random for a while. I don’t think I could read it from front to back yet; it’s a very powerful read.

Loving the Enlightenments @Boiledbeetle.
Adds a documentary depth.

Well done and thank you to @Boiledbeetle
and everyone. And thank you for including mine; I feel I am in good company 😊.

I love your poem! I think it book ends well with the first poem. I start off with a man declaring he's a woman and gaining access to the women toilets and you end with a man declaring he's a woman and gaining access to the women's toilets!

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Swashbuckled · 07/11/2023 20:18

Wow!

I’ve been dipping in and opening at random for a while. I don’t think I could read it from front to back yet; it’s a very powerful read.

Loving the Enlightenments @Boiledbeetle.
Adds a documentary depth.

Well done and thank you to @Boiledbeetle
and everyone. And thank you for including mine; I feel I am in good company 😊.

Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 07/11/2023 19:52

DialSquare · 07/11/2023 19:29

Book is lonely no more. Although it didn't quite reach the mat as it was stuck in the letterbox! It seems no one else in my house heard it being posted.

Hello my precious..... Oh and hi Dial!

Happy 📚 reading!

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Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 07/11/2023 19:51

TessoftheDurbeyfields · 07/11/2023 19:49

Oooh! Some are better than I remembered but some are much worse 😆

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You were on one that day! 😁 I like them!

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TessoftheDurbeyfields · 07/11/2023 19:49

Boiledbeetle · 07/11/2023 18:35

Well that's you all sorted for this evening

Page 82. Turn to page 82!

Show quote history

Oooh! Some are better than I remembered but some are much worse 😆

DialSquare · 07/11/2023 19:29

Book is lonely no more. Although it didn't quite reach the mat as it was stuck in the letterbox! It seems no one else in my house heard it being posted.

Lurking Merkins - Volume Two of Under the Duvet of Darkness
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