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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Asking someone’s pronouns is as important as finding out their name

137 replies

SamW98 · 15/09/2023 16:55

https://metro.co.uk/2023/09/13/talking-about-pronouns-isnt-a-chore-its-like-asking-someones-name-19491080/amp/

No it really isn’t. Does anyone really meet a new person in a social setting and say ‘hi I’m Doris and my pronouns are hee/haw, what’s your name and pronouns?

Talking about pronouns isn't a chore – it's like asking someone's name

Making your pronouns clear is no different than people clarifying that your name is, in fact, just ‘Becca’ and not ‘Rebecca’.

https://metro.co.uk/2023/09/13/talking-about-pronouns-isnt-a-chore-its-like-asking-someones-name-19491080/amp/

OP posts:
turbonerd · 16/09/2023 07:49

Pigsinspaaace · 15/09/2023 23:47

But before or after favourite condiment or third favourite insect?

Well. Exactly. There’s just so much work to do here.

Waitwhat23 · 16/09/2023 06:17

Reminds me of my favourite Christmas cracker joke -

Why are pirates called pirates?

.........

They just arrrrr.

Likeafurchin · 16/09/2023 06:14

I'm unreasonably irritated by the whole she/her mantra. Even if you buy into that shit you only need to say "she". We know how grammar works

I was in a zoom meeting with a he/his the other day. I guess he/him just wasn't proprietorial enough.

IcakethereforeIam · 16/09/2023 00:37

This thread has reminded me that next Tuesday is Talk Like a Pirate Day ☠️ I think the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster might be captured though 😔.

Pigsinspaaace · 15/09/2023 23:47

But before or after favourite condiment or third favourite insect?

bluebeardswife7 · 15/09/2023 23:34

Chipperfish · 15/09/2023 17:05

In my list of importance its after favourite seashanty but before lucky crystal

Drunken sailor, amethyst, calll me what you want, as long as you call me

viques · 15/09/2023 23:08

quantumbutterfly · 15/09/2023 23:00

well since you aarrrsked so nicely.

☠

quantumbutterfly · 15/09/2023 23:00

viques · 15/09/2023 22:53

If you don’t mind I would like to borrow your pronoun for a day. Next Tuesday, 19 th September to be exact, which as we all know is International Talk Like a Pirate Day.

well since you aarrrsked so nicely.

literalviolence · 15/09/2023 22:54

can I choose 'literal/literals' as my pronouns because I identity as myself and a one-off?

viques · 15/09/2023 22:53

quantumbutterfly · 15/09/2023 22:19

I've now been re-educated, my pronoun is aarrrrr.

If you don’t mind I would like to borrow your pronoun for a day. Next Tuesday, 19 th September to be exact, which as we all know is International Talk Like a Pirate Day.

quantumbutterfly · 15/09/2023 22:21

I am (of course) pirate gender. It was all those sea shanties.

quantumbutterfly · 15/09/2023 22:19

I've now been re-educated, my pronoun is aarrrrr.

OchonAgusOchonOh · 15/09/2023 21:53

ArabeIIaScott · 15/09/2023 21:43

Oh god, do not get me started on extraneous Gaelic sign offs from people who don't speak it.

And even worse again, his He/Him were capitalised whereas his sé/é were lowercase.

Colonial superiority complex as well as cultural appropriation.

ArabeIIaScott · 15/09/2023 21:43

OchonAgusOchonOh · 15/09/2023 20:28

I recently received an email from an English colleague (we're in Ireland) with his pronouns in both English and Irish, a language he does not speak one word of. I was tempted to accuse him of cultural appropriation except for the half hour earnest lecture I would have received.

Oh god, do not get me started on extraneous Gaelic sign offs from people who don't speak it.

SamW98 · 15/09/2023 21:40

Can I just say thank you all. I knew when I started this thread there were be some brilliant responses and you’ve had me laughing out loud this evening.

OP posts:
OhcantthInkofaname · 15/09/2023 21:32

SamW98 · 15/09/2023 17:12

Nailed it 👏👏

Double nailed it!

WhiteFire · 15/09/2023 21:22

One is lucky if I remember one's name. One should not expect me to also remember pronouns as well.

Toseland · 15/09/2023 21:21

"No thanks I'm an athiest"

RedToothBrush · 15/09/2023 21:19

Apollo441 · 15/09/2023 17:02

Pronouns are a great way of announcing you are a complete narcissistic bell end and anyone with a brain should avoid you. So they serve a purpose.

Yep. They are an open invitation to 'stir clear'.

BirdiePlantaganet · 15/09/2023 21:17

When I see colleagues have added their pronouns to their email signatures, despite there being absolutely no corporate directive to do so, I immediately go right off them and think them twats.

BinturongsSmellOfPopcorn · 15/09/2023 21:13

Precipice · 15/09/2023 17:31

Leaving aside all the issues with pronoun pronouncements generally, the claim is nonsensical. The main function of learning someone's name is to be able to distinguish that person to others. If we're talking one-on-one, it doesn't matter if I don't know that your name is Caroline. If I have to talk about you to someone else, it's useful to be able to identify you by name and say that Caroline has done or not done X, rather than to try to identify you by descriptions. Preferred pronouns don't carry that same function in communication.

And therein lies the joy of neopronouns - you can have your very own, truly personal pronouns rather than having to share.

Right - I'm off to ponder my favourite seashanty, which is proving tricky because my brain is currently serving up drinking songs instead (including a German one for which I can remember hardly any of the tune and only one of the words - not helpful).

BlackForestCake · 15/09/2023 21:04

It's just an addition to the old joke about how you know someone is a vegetarian, or from Yorkshire, or runs marathons (just wait five minutes and they'll tell you).

Catsanfan · 15/09/2023 20:56

BTW said Phil had rung me earlier and had a voice that had definitely broken before he sent me an incredibly irritating marketing email

VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia · 15/09/2023 20:41

PermanentTemporary · 15/09/2023 20:01

I suppose I do find it annoying on others' behalves when women in hijab or niqab are asked for their Christian name at work. It's thoughtless imo and I don't think that phrasing is used much anymore, given name is more likely now.

I also know that the two women in the team who are now giving their pronouns in their email are not bellends. What does scare me a bit is that they are language impairment specialists. My view is that for me to ask people with aphasia to use any specific pronoun, even if obvious, is adding unnecessarily to their linguistic burden. And I don't think they give them to patients, only other staff members. Which doesn't feel very equitable or partnership focused.

I had to look aphasia up. So that's what the thing where I can't remember the names of things and misorder the words of my sentences is called!

Being autistic, I don't remember names. I'm not going to remember your pronouns either.

SamW98 · 15/09/2023 20:36

LittleGreenDuck · 15/09/2023 20:18

I received an email from a colleague earlier that not only had pronouns announced, but they were typed in rainbow colours as well, for extra wankery points.

I think that would have been my Falling Down moment where my laptop went through the window

OP posts:
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