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Original poster

Majorly outed myself at work

110 replies

cheshirecatssmile · 28/03/2023 12:41

I work for the nhs. Yesterday we were handed some laminated shite about gender identity information.
The fella handed it to me saying it had come from the inclusion &diversity dude. He's also LBGT+ lead and my head of nursing.

I showed the laminate to some gay members of my team. They were disgusted by the wording.

So I emailed the heads of nursing, stating the bloody obvious.
I had backing off my manager who didn't want the laminate on the staff room wall.

So pressed send. Had radio silence back.

I'm now getting my ducks in a row, maybe not needed , but just in case.

I had also sent them a foi regarding there partnership with stonewall.

It's either going to be how do we shut her up or how do we distance ourselves from it.

Either way big black mark against my name.

OP posts:
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SerafinasGoose · 28/03/2023 15:23

I got asked about the suffragette pin I wear on my uniform
Could it be removed. By a person wearing a rainbow lanyard.

They have some brass neck.

I would love a suffragette pin, if I could get hold of one.

Original poster
cheshirecatssmile · 28/03/2023 15:19

There was a bit at the bottom of the email where they replied to each of my statements.

Apparently I shouldn't be offended to be called a cis

Pronouns are to make a culture of expectance.

That the trust doesn't like the word queer so uses the + sign instead .
So why put that term on the poster ??

If gay and lesbian staff don't like it tell them to join the group and a swipe that I must of been quick to speak to gay staff.

As staff felt safe to speak to me , would I be willing to join the network?!

Not enough single sex services within the trust.

Gave me a list of the organisations they are working with. Usual suspects.

Well. They certainly put some effort in 😂

OP posts:
Theeyeballsinthesky · 28/03/2023 15:14

cheshirecatssmile · 28/03/2023 14:54

I've had a response
Usual reply of thank you for getting in touch.
Sent me a link to the equality policy at work.
Is happy to speak to me.

Game on

Good for you OP!

Let’s hope your equality policy lists the correct protected characteristics

i pushed back on the use of gender on some nhs forms when they meant biological sex. Didn't get a response but glad I did it

Needmoresleep · 28/03/2023 15:08

I got asked about the suffragette pin I wear on my uniform .
Could it be removed. By a person wearing a rainbow lanyard.
Well.....

Brilliant. I so hope we are at the beginning of the end on this nonsense, rather than at the end of the beginning.

Good luck. I think organisations, even the NHS, have realised that they cannot pick on people for being GC. Which does not mean that EDI leads won’t try to push their nonsense. What else do they do to justify their large salaries.

TeenDivided · 28/03/2023 14:58

cheshirecatssmile · 28/03/2023 14:54

I've had a response
Usual reply of thank you for getting in touch.
Sent me a link to the equality policy at work.
Is happy to speak to me.

Game on

As a matter of interest, does your equality policy talk about sex and gender reassignment, or something else?

caniexchangesil · 28/03/2023 14:57

I'm very proud of you OP. Kudos! And thank you on behalf of women. All women. Even those who don't yet realise they're giving away their rights.

Original poster
cheshirecatssmile · 28/03/2023 14:54

I've had a response
Usual reply of thank you for getting in touch.
Sent me a link to the equality policy at work.
Is happy to speak to me.

Game on

OP posts:
Mitsubishicolt · 28/03/2023 14:28

I work for the NHS and had been quietly GC for a couple of years. However, started speaking up (could not contain the rage) and soon became apparent that everyone else in my dept was also quietly GC 😁. (Higher management are a different matter and seem to be at least 5 years behind the times - Chief Exec has only recently started adding his pronouns to staff-wide emails and sending round educational genderbread diagrams. Not sure what's brought that on)

TalcumX · 28/03/2023 14:06

PatatiPatatras · 28/03/2023 13:18

Prepare to be assimilated re-educated.

Ooh new Borg gif

star trek borg GIF
ArabellaScott · 28/03/2023 14:04

OP, thank you. We need to stand up to this, when we can.

Original poster
cheshirecatssmile · 28/03/2023 13:59

Zebedee999 · 28/03/2023 13:43

OP did the right thing. Few people have the guts to stand up and be counted.

At Leicester Royal Infirmary last week with their rainbow coloured footpaths etc. Where does the NHS find the money for all this propaganda?

All corridors are covered in rainbow stuff , mingled in with the 6cs and equality.

I know the trust got funding to improve the hospital, we thought equipment, fixing the roof. No. Giant stickers and paint everything grey

OP posts:
Zebedee999 · 28/03/2023 13:43

OP did the right thing. Few people have the guts to stand up and be counted.

At Leicester Royal Infirmary last week with their rainbow coloured footpaths etc. Where does the NHS find the money for all this propaganda?

Forester1 · 28/03/2023 13:31

Glad you’ve raised it. The more this stuff is challenged the better.

Original poster
cheshirecatssmile · 28/03/2023 13:20

They can fuck off

OP posts:
TenterfieldSaddler · 28/03/2023 13:19

Well done you.
I admire your courage to use your voice.

PatatiPatatras · 28/03/2023 13:18

Prepare to be assimilated re-educated.

Original poster
cheshirecatssmile · 28/03/2023 13:16

RoseslnTheHospital · 28/03/2023 13:11

The objections to the use of "queer" is absolutely fair enough. The LGBT lead should be aware that plenty of LGB people find the use of the term "queer" as a catch all description to be horrific. Based on it being a term of abuse, in the recent past and still in many cases now.

I don't think it's useful to push on the "what about heterosexual people?" angle. Mainly because they won't be being discriminated against by people for being heterosexual. NHS staff that assume heteronormativity won't therefore be discriminating against people that actually are heterosexual!

Maybe I wasn't clear.
I didn't add to my email about heterosexual people. That's what the gay man asked me. He was his opinion and I listened

OP posts:
Original poster
cheshirecatssmile · 28/03/2023 13:14

I was too chicken tbf at first.
I've followed what's been going on from afar.
Then about 6 months ago , I had my sunlight wtf moment.

I haven't shut up since.
I've joined a women rights group
Voice my opinion in person and by email.
And my town is covered in adhesive statements shall we say.

#LetWomenSpeak

I got asked about the suffragette pin I wear on my uniform .
Could it be removed. By a person wearing a rainbow lanyard.
Well.....

OP posts:
RoseslnTheHospital · 28/03/2023 13:11

The objections to the use of "queer" is absolutely fair enough. The LGBT lead should be aware that plenty of LGB people find the use of the term "queer" as a catch all description to be horrific. Based on it being a term of abuse, in the recent past and still in many cases now.

I don't think it's useful to push on the "what about heterosexual people?" angle. Mainly because they won't be being discriminated against by people for being heterosexual. NHS staff that assume heteronormativity won't therefore be discriminating against people that actually are heterosexual!

Original poster
cheshirecatssmile · 28/03/2023 13:11

😂

OP posts:
Piffpaffpoff · 28/03/2023 13:07

cheshirecatssmile · 28/03/2023 13:05

@Piffpaffpoff

I don't think you've majorly outed yourself.

Yes maybe I was a bit dramatic there sorry 😂

Just to be clear, that was supposed to be supportive! I don't think I could have done it, I'm too chicken so I cheerlead from afar...

Original poster
cheshirecatssmile · 28/03/2023 13:05

@Piffpaffpoff

I don't think you've majorly outed yourself.

Yes maybe I was a bit dramatic there sorry 😂

OP posts:
TeenDivided · 28/03/2023 13:02

how not to offend people by treating them as gender neutral.

I see this as a sure fire way of offending 99% of people.

FrillyGoatFluff · 28/03/2023 12:58

In my experience big organisations (like the nhs and local authorities) don't like it when you call them out on something that's a done deal.

I kicked off with a local authority that I worked for when they circulated a bulletin on domestic abuse. The terminology was totally wrong, they only referred to female victims (I know the majority are, but men do suffer DA too, and it's not helpful to generalise in this instance), the steps they advised people to take to offer help was way out.

I spoke to the team who had produced it and pointed out the glaring errors and then got pulled up by HR. Stood my ground, and it was corrected, eventually.

So frustrating.

Piffpaffpoff · 28/03/2023 12:57

I don't think you've majorly outed yourself. My line to mgt would be that you are feeding back the views of a number of staff who came to you individually, too scared to speak up themselves because of the toxicity around the subject and that that in itself is an additional concern.

Well done though, someone needs to be saying it.

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