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Original poster

All the bad things JKR has done. A history.

532 replies

WandaWomblesaurus73 · 05/01/2022 21:08

I think this is a good time to go over all the bad things JKR has done (as started on the did he or didn't he Jon Stewart thread)

Earlier, I went into the bathroom and I noticed JK Rowling had moved the cat litter tray so I stood in a little bit of cat poop.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
11
MummBRaaarrrTheEverLeaking · 05/01/2022 21:30

@bishophaha

Everyone that doesn't indicate to come off the roundabout at the exit before you is JKR.
Grin

JKR turned me into a newt!

I got better.

She also caused my earlier knee twinge. Not the exercise class I did last night, no siree, it was all JKR.

yourhairiswinterfire · 05/01/2022 21:30

JKR leaves toast crumbs in my butter. DP swears it's not him, so the only other person it could be is her.

I'm pretty sure she also broke my electric whisk and kept shtum about it, so when I came to whip my cream for my first ever banoffee pie, I couldn't. Ruined dessert. Witch.

ChloeCrocodile · 05/01/2022 21:28

She punctured my tyre last night, deliberately waiting until it was raining so I got soaked changing it.

FortunaMajor · 05/01/2022 21:25

@SusannaQueen

It was JK Rowling who told your Mum Mr Frosty was rubbish and that's why you didn't get one for Christmas.

She's always truthful😅,

Grin truth right there!
DryHeave · 05/01/2022 21:23

JKR personally bewitched my cat to run over my face at 3am.

Theeyeballsinthesky · 05/01/2022 21:22

She squeezes the toothpaste from the middle AND she never puts the lid on so you get horrid dry bits

Original poster
WandaWomblesaurus73 · 05/01/2022 21:22

I'm stuck here looking at a photograph of Sirius Black with long glossy hair wearing nothing but a fur coat and some trousers.
I'm disgusted at his tattooed chest and angled jaw.

It's her fault.

OP posts:
bitingcat · 05/01/2022 21:21

I am reliably informed that JKR actually started the Covid pandemic! Shock

Wakeywakeysleepyhead · 05/01/2022 21:21

Devious cow made my OH spend hours and hours reading all the HP books to our DSs when he could have been down the pub and they could have been putting themselves to bed.

TInkyWlnky · 05/01/2022 21:20

I really fancied a biscuit tonight, but when I went to the cupboard I realized JK had got there first and eaten the lot.

Also she left crumbs everywhere to taunt me.

littlbrowndog · 05/01/2022 21:20

She made me stand on the mouse guts in my bare foot. That woman is a menance

Ohpulltheotherone · 05/01/2022 21:19

Who shot JR?

JKR did

OakleyStreetisnotinChelsea · 05/01/2022 21:19

She truly is the direct cause of my problem. My youngest child saw a plush niffler in a shop and walked around the shop cuddling it. This led to father Christmas purchasing the niffler and putting it in the child's stocking. The child was so delighted that he used a mahoosive cardboard box to make a house for Niffy Niffleton and filled it with shiny things. The Cat then decided that this nice house lined with a fluffy dressing gown was a glorious place to sleep. So I now have a massive box in my kitchen that I am not allowed to move because the child will sulk and the cat will probably kill me in my sleep. And it is all JKRs fault for being a massive Terfy dinosaur.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 05/01/2022 21:19

I blame her for the massive scrum at Kings Cross.

ISpyCobraKai · 05/01/2022 21:18

@FortunaMajor

It was JK Rowling who told your Mum Mr Frosty was rubbish and that's why you didn't get one for Christmas.
She did the same with a Big yellow teapot I bet. I always wanted one of those and never got one.
CatNamedEaster · 05/01/2022 21:17

I think she might have killed one of my peace lilies.

I am also convinced she told my parents that all my school shoes had to come from Start-rite when I wanted to kitten heel courts from Dolcis.

SusannaQueen · 05/01/2022 21:17

It was JK Rowling who told your Mum Mr Frosty was rubbish and that's why you didn't get one for Christmas.

She's always truthful😅,

puckingfixies · 05/01/2022 21:17

She made me eat all the Christmas chocolate and then put a spell on my wardrobe, my clothes are shrinking.

Mrsfrumble · 05/01/2022 21:17

She’s filled my house with Hogwarts-related tat. Thanks to her malign influence, DD spends every penny she gets her grubby little paws on on HP merchandise. I’ve just fished a plastic light-up wand from behind the sofa cushions I’m sitting on.

Dreadful woman.

Original poster
WandaWomblesaurus73 · 05/01/2022 21:16

@CiaoForDiNiaoSaur

She ate the last slice of chocolate cake Sad
She usually does.
OP posts:
OhDear2200 · 05/01/2022 21:16

You know those plastic packets that are really hard to get into. They usually (ironically) contain scissors.

She designed them.

Bussinbussin · 05/01/2022 21:16

JKR sprayed Lynx Africa in the bathroom and now my eyes are watering.

CiaoForDiNiaoSaur · 05/01/2022 21:15

She ate the last slice of chocolate cake Sad

MichelleScarn · 05/01/2022 21:14

She made it rain again today! You know how much power she has!!

picklemewalnuts · 05/01/2022 21:13

@Deadringer

She made me cry when Dobby died. Wagon.
Undeniably true. Cow.
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