Do you feel female?

If I'd had the choice I would have deffo been born a man....

Women are too emotional/moody/needy sometimes, and I can't always relate to that...

"seeing people who look like me in positions of power and up on pedestals (literally)" - obviously that was meant to be in the good things list

I am trying to imagine how things would be different if I woke up male. All the problems I would have as a result would be because of what society expects of me, as would most of the benefits. I mean, it would be great to be stronger for free, just being able to run faster and have a stronger body would be nice.

But the good things, like not having to do anything but wash myself and throw on clothes in order to be presentable to society, being able to walk around at night without fear of attack, fitting in with "the boys" at work - those are all societal benefits. If society was less obsessed with women's appearance, bothered to investigate and prosecute sexual assaults, and inclined to value women's contribution in the workplace then I could have all those benefits right now while female.

Likewise the bad things, like worrying about looking weak if I express emotions, being less "courteously" treated (aware this is the flipside of a bad thing but still), seeing people who look like me in positions of power and up on pedestals (literally) - those would disappear if sexism did.

I love being a woman, and it's fair to say I have got used to it. But I'm not sure that it's a biological thing.

Where attributes are brought down to their basic gender stereotypes (empathy and nurturing versus leadership and ambition) I have aspects of all of them. That is hardly unusual.

I have always worked with this balance and enjoyed the contrasts.

I have a good friend who transsexual and is in the process of transitioning from male to female. I've never questioned that she was born in the wrong body, it makes perfect sense.
I do find it difficult to comprehend how far she is trying to push away any of the masculine traits in trying to appear more female. I understand that being physically male was incredibly difficult and damaging for her but my point is that we all have something of both male / female traits and that trying to hyper-feminise herself is turing her into a caricature.

The thing is diy and adventure sports and liking male company and flat shoes is personality/preferences/socialisation.

I suspect most people can't say that they feel gendered because they just feel like themselves. I suspect it's when you don't feel something, a lack of something, that you aware of what it is to feel gender.

I'm not very 'girly' but I definately love being female and wouldn't swap it for the world. I feel like men miss out a bit but I'm sure they don't as they are who they are.

I love being a mother and don't mind too much the role of housewife. I'd prefer that to breadwinner. When I do eventually go back to work it will be a chore for me.

Funnily enough I know that I have felt that way since I was a child.

To be honest I haven't a clue whether I feel female or not. I just feel like me. How am I supposed to know whether some of that is a specifically "female" feeling, or just my own individual personality? No idea.

I have no idea what it feels like so no.

I just feel "me".

I'm a bit of both I think...

Honestly? No I don't. I struggle to relate to women, and prefer the company of men. I have a very male logical brain (it always comes out as male on those online tests), and tend to enjoy the sort of recreational activities preferred by men (eg cars, football, paintballing). Having said that, I have no desire to BE male. I can't comprehend waking up a different gender, whichever universe I was in.

I don't feel particularly female,I don't think - I am certainly not stereotypically female.The point in my life when I actually felt that I positively liked being female was when I was pregnant,and breastfeeding.(Didn't enjoy being pregnant,but is is an incredible thing watching that new life develop,and I loved breastfeeding.)
I'd been thinking about this in the light of all the threads discussing gender,and realised that in some ways I have felt all my life that I wasn't normal/a proper woman/whatever and it was quite relaxing having the DCs because of course that proved I was and dropped me into a neat pre-determined female slot...

Having said that,I'm sure that what I am uncomfortable with is society's stereotype of femininity,and I have never felt that I wasn't a woman.However,I quite fancy the idea of waking in a parallel universe as a man,and trying out a male body(from the inside,as it were )

i feel individual. i'm a mother, a wife, i've served in the military and run around with a gun...

i'm fascinated by the whole idea of gender - i do have trans friends and have discussed it at length with them. fascinating.

we are all individuals, indeed.

I feel human. I feel like a living being. The fact that I'm female seems like a minor detail. If I became male tomorrow, I could not breastfeed or carry children any more but that would not change my essential self.

I'm 39 weeks pregnant in 34C heat - I've never felt so 'female' in my life!
My nipples have recently shocked me by oozing, my privates feel like a big bruise, and the bump is dropping (well, it feels like it's going to burrow out of me at this rate) - so yes, I think I do feel female. I rarely feel "feminine" though - but at the moment I feel very essentially female (and I've never considered myself an essentialist when it comes to matters of gender.)

ALL THAT SAID: doesn't mean that people who feel trapped in the wrong body don't feel that way. How on earth could I pronounce on what they 'really feel'?
And saying what I said in the first bit doesn't mean that I think gender is essential.

Yes, I do. And I think the last paragraph of tortoise's post is fairly close to how I feel. And it's not the same as being feminine.

When I was younger I had some doubts about feeling feminine, due to fitting neither the girly nor the tomboyish stereotype. But luckily I learnt to ignore the stereotypes.

The thing is, despite it's flaws, I love my body. Not aesthetically, or even functionally (as it is deeply flawed both ways), but in that it feels right. In a way that a male body wouldn't.

The way I understand it, those who are transgendered feel as if their body fits wrong, as if it is uncomfortable.

There are other layers in there about femininity/masculinity, which encompasses child birth/rearing and "girliness", but I've always had it explained to me as being primarily a discomfort in their own skin.

It's an interesting one, and I find it hard to conceptualise as well.

I feel very, very female. I was talking to my mother about this the other day, we agreed that despite the whole inconvenient "being the oppressed class" thing, neither of us would change being female in a million years.

I loved giving birth, it was the most amazing experience, very primal, lots of fun, really really want to do it again. My mothering feels very - I can't articulate this, but it comes from a very deep place inside me, and it feels like a female place, and it's associated with my physicality. I'm not at all jealous that my partner can't give birth - I feel incredibly lucky to be the one who gets to do that.

But it is interesting. A lot of the things that make me very female are things that I think are socially constructed; I have what tends to be thought of as a very female sort of intelligence (empathetic and intuitive and whatnot), and certainly all my hobbies (cooking, gardening, writing) are stereotypically female. I don't know how to separate out how much of this is inherent and how much cultural.

I do know that my husband, having been given the space and encouragement to take on part of the "female" parenting role, has become very attuned to our daughter. I've read studies that agree with this; the more time fathers spend with their young children, especially with bodily contact from cuddling, bathing, etc, the more 'loving' hormones their body produces - the same oxycontin hormones as tends to be found in new mothers. So that's tricky again, if hormonal secretions adjust to a social role.

Very long answer, sorry. The short version is yes - although I can't articulate what, and why, I do feel integrally female. The idea of being male, with external genitalia and testosterone rushing around and not being able to carry a child is - much as I love men - slightly repugnant in how alien it feels.