I feel physically sick at how much grandparents spending on Christmas

Wow, I must be an outlier then as we spend approx £30 per grandchild and we have 3 grandchildren.

Both DS’s families live in flats so buying excessive amounts of stuff won’t work for them, even assuming they’d welcome it. Which they definitely wouldn’t.

Good idea to speak with them. It’s an act of love from them but over-gifting is a pain for the recipient. Let them know you appreciate the effort but you’d prefer they keep to one gift per child as you don’t have space for lots of presents.

I think you may have to move it up a gear and just tell her that most of her gifts will be going straight to the charity shop as you don’t have the space.

I’ve had the same problem op. There is no way around it other than being incredibly blunt. We started off nicely, suggesting it was too much and they didn’t stop. After a few years we ended up being incredibly blunt and they seem to have listened.
like you, I don’t want a massive pile of plastic in my home. Toys that the kids will never play with. Instead I would much rather they receive a small number of gift which the kids actually want. For a lack of a better term, we now ‘allow’ them to buy a very small number of small gifts of their choice, and then give them a list of big gifts of which they are free to pick what they like and we will buy the rest

No, no, no!
Grandkids don’t exist solely to provide entertainment for grandparents.

That’s just wild!! Tell her you really appreciate her generosity but could the money go into a saving account, ISA or Little Treasures (Royal Mint) to support the kids as they grow? @Sadiuit

an annual family pass is such a good idea. I get it - we’ve grandkids and probably went a bit overboard in first couple of years (nothing on this scale) as it is exciting, but we asked our kids what their kids would like, picked a couple of gifts off the list and just got the best ones we could, with a couple of extra bits. Our kids are into sustainable toys (wooden not plastic), and the temptation for plastic crap is there when you go into big toy shops. It’s important to listen to the parents. And topping up savings for GKs is always a good idea if possible.

I don’t think the OP should say this.

You're both rude and entitled

Utterly pathetic, who needs all that. Donate money to a children's charity instead of save money for the grandchild when they are 18.

My MIL does this too. The toys are the worst kind of plastic tat and so many of them. Speaking to her about it hasn’t worked so I just charity shop them asap after Christmas

I don’t (and would never) expect inheritance from anyone so that would be fine to me.

You sound deeply vindictive and unhappy, I’m guessing you have strained relationships with your DC. I hope you don’t want a relationship with DGC in future because I can imagine that would be difficult.

£250 is fine if needing bigger budget items, a bike for example or Nintendo games.
£250 on tatt from B and M would stress me out !
If she can afford to spend that much its fine but quality over quantity.
How about they pay for a trip to the pantomime or xmas light trail ?

Try thanking them for being so generous but ask for a single gift per child, and for the rest of the money that they want to spend to be paid into your child's savings account to help the child out when they want to make a large purcase , travel, study etc later in life. . Give them the childrens account numbers details to emphasise that what you would far prefer to see done with their generosity

I’m a nanny too; I always, always ask the parents first what the children would like. Pointless buying a lot of stuff they will ignore. This amount of money is about the grandparents, not the children.

Can you not ask them to do £50 of presents and the rest to go into a savings account. The amount of plastic and disposable crap that £500 would be, I'd feel sick as well

My ex MIL was like this. She would save all year to go nuts at Christmas. She would pick one of Everything in the toy store, then I would spend the rest of the year throwing each thing away. It makes me sick to think of all of the wasted money and plastic crap. Now they’re older they get things they actually need like football boots and coats!

Ask for the cash instead!!

In all seriousness, I think you need to have an honest conversation and say as lovely as the idea is, there are some things the kids really need and could they help toward those instead. It’s horribly wasteful and shortsighted as most of that stuff breaks within the first month!

What a rude, disrespectful and selfish attitude you have. To instantly think of inheritance when someone mentions parents, who as far as we know are in perfect health.

You don't seem to actually understand what 'respect' is, either.

Oh goodness. My Mum also loves to buy things for DD and every time she takes her out they'll come back with a charity shop haul which I'll need to find storage space for. I think she doesn't understand that she has a 5 bed detached and we have a 3 bed terrace and no room for it!

Last week, she sent 3 boxes of stuff- a box of books that she thought we'd like, a box of Halloween decorations and a box from the attic of things that belonged to me as a child. They're just sat in the middle of the living room because everywhere is full and I have no idea how to store any of it.

Then tell her no!

I have a grandchild and have a rule that I won't spend or buy more than the parents. It's not fair on the parents.

The parents/Santa gifts are supposed to be the stars.

In laws thought that bigger was better. So they would buy enormous cheap presents.
Problem being DC never played with them, and you ended up storing them in case in laws asked where they were. Whenever they came they seem confused they weren’t absolutely enamoured with them.
And then when you eventually got rid they would ask about them and be annoyed about it.

Its not about being ungrateful, its about in laws not totally wasting money.

lol at the ‘don’t ruin Christmas spirit’ and ‘selfish DILs’ brigade. It’s not selfish or killing Christmas spirit to not want a load of absolute shit from B&M. Case in point, when I used to ask my mum to, instead of buying mountains of shit that nobody, and I mean NOBODY wanted, and instead take them to a Panto or light show or just about anything else. Answer was always a big, fat, NO. Wouldn’t spending time with your grandkids at a panto be Christmas spirit? Instead of going ‘come on, keep going, smile, you don’t look grateful enough, you’re 12 now don’t you love all this superman shit and cheap bath stuff you can’t use?” While they’re opening a sea of crappy stuff? It’s all about the narcissistic pleasure of doing what they want, it’s nothing to do with the children’s happiness or Christmas spirit. It’s ’my way or the highway’ condensed into a day of the year.