Is is inappropriate to have thread titles talking about suicide?

That sounds like an incredibly difficult and scary thing to do TotalChaos, even though I can see it would be a good thing. I can imagine if you had a real-life person who would make you do it it might be manageable, but if you were on your own it would be so hard.

I would interpret advice about seeking professional help meaning going to A & E, explaining the problem and asking to see the duty psychiatrist - so getting some sort of professional assessment of how ill the person is very quickly. Agree that actual therapies etc tend to have long waiting lists.

It's not innapropriate to have thread titles talking about suicide.

They, thankfully seem rare.

It's not like we have a suicide cyber cafe on here.

This is life, good and bad. MN have a disclaimer, about it.

An Op who starts a thread is likely to cause different reactions across the board.

If you want to lend an ear then go ahead. It is a cry for help, I have been there. Sometimes you can't just get immediate professional help. Counselling can take months, an appt at the GP can take days.

I think its narrow minded to be offended at such a cry for help. It's not pleasant to see a thread title like it, of course not. I just know the relief it must give to someone to have at least an answer, when you have reached out.

not read whole thread just responding to op but i don't think it's inappropriate at all. "feeling low/depressed" threads, indeed most posts in mental health, rarely generate much response ime, unless op is a well known poster, as a) they're pretty common and b) understandably many people don't feel they can help.

to be able to flag up a critical post when somebody is desperate is very important, clearly stating their needs in the thread title is a way of doing this.

as for "vulnerable people" getting involved, that would likely be people who've been in similar situations themselves as i have. we are still grown adults you know, we don't need other people's grief policing for our benefit. i've received help online when i've been very low and recognise how valuable that can be alongside professional help, i feel deep compassion for anyone in that situation and i would see talking to someone in that situation a way of paying forward the help i'd been given in the past. my decision, not yours op.

Well, sadly, the poster in question has posted at least one other thread exactly like that on Mumsnet before, not so long ago. And frequently refers to her problems in posts on threads started by other people. I can only hope she manages to turn a corner somehow.

I think the thread that this one's about was handled well, actually - every poster said said that the OP needed professional help, some suggested where to get it, and nobody on it suggested that mn alone could 'fix' the problem.

I don't see that copying and pasting advice from the top of the page helped or added anything of value to the original thread.

I'm really sorry to hear that, Gibbon, that's awful. I'll be thinking of you.

Yes...sorry.

Feeling a bit weepy so was maybe a tad harsh.
Though I still don't agree with the 'not appropiate' sentiment.

Will bow out now.

TBF to SYNT she posted something helpful on the other thread about getting proper help and support so I think you are being a bit unreasonable Gibbon, even though I am sure it is a sore subject for you right now

Sorry post did not really make sense, no point praying now but you get my point. Hopefully.

TBH, I understand people being all thoughtful about the current thread but the whole board has never stopped because one poster was going through a tough time before so why now? Presumably that thread is not in the same section as this?

Sometimes events spark a debate or a question, that is normal not something to keep under wraps! People do not stop posting birth announcments because someone posts about a MC and so on.

SYNT, sorry you feel got at but this is an emotive subject and people were bound to have strong feelings! (Although personal attacks are not really necessary, regardless of how strongly a person feels!) I do think it is one that merits discussion, people and opinions change so just going on "it has been discussed before" is not enough really.

It isn't just about other people's discomfort about being confronted with suicide. It is also about genuine worries about how to help - or avoid harming - a suicidal or very depressed person. Sometimes the thread will be helpful; sometimes it will be dangerous, not just because of what responents might say, but also because the very business of posting about suicide online will sometimes be produced by the illness itself, and not by an attempt to deal with the illness. There is a danger, just sometimes, that starting the thread is almost like a form of self-harm in itself - something done by the op to display to herself her sense of hurt, or to make herself seem more real to herself when she feels profoundly 'unreal' because of illness.

I'm speaking under a namechange because these things are way too disturbing to bring up to poeple who know you. (I've never started a suicide thread myself, and would never mention suicidal feelings to any but a professional, precisely because of these sorts of concerns about the whole enterprise.)

I don't envy MNHQ their job in this respect. Extremely hard to come up with the right policy.

Agree with others that I know of i think one mumsnetter whose life was if not saved, certainly received a lot of appropriate help after such a thread.

A close relative of mine tried to jump under a train quite recently and I posted about it on here, the advice and help i received was utterly fantastic and made huge difference.

I really wish that my relative had found somewhere like this to talk online before the train incident. He really felt that he could not talk to anyone in real life. He didn't want people he was close to judging him etc. He really felt that feeling that low was a dirty little secret. He needed an anonymous lifeline somewhere in my opinion.
For people who feel like that, it is not always a case of "oh well, call the samaritans", sometimes even a phonecall is to personal.
It is not correct to state that people who talk about committing suicide don't do it. He spoke about it alot. He still tried (very hard) to do it. It was only a passing commuter that stopped him.

I'm glad the op has asked for this thread to go now. It's got an awful title and quite frankly it's coming at things from the wrong angle.

If you have an issue with someone posting that they feel suicidal then hide the mental health category.
I think this has nothing to do with what is right or wrong but everything to do with peoples discomfort when faced with the subject of suicide.

I didnt even realise there was an ongoing thread about this.

Probably best if it gets pulled but before it does have you stopped to think of those left behind.

Imagine finding out your loved one has reached out for help and finding they have been ignored. How devastated would you be? On the other hand even if the thread did not have a positive outcome, I imagine it would bring some comfort (albeit a small one) to know your loved one has had someone to talk to in their darkest moments.

no one agree that suicide threads will be replaced by carefully worded ones?
also, what if an "I'm feeling down" thread becomes a suicide one halfway through?

'who says the op is in the minority. Maybe there are others who feel this way but don't feel they can say so.
'

which is the same as people who don't viote- they ahve signed away their opinion by default

(sorry Wannabe keppicking up on your posts LOL, oops)

Am not sure peopleare being mean to OP but if theya re thats not OK, but one has to accept the existence of other opinions

I disagree, Deadworm. I am objecting to the way the OP expressed herself, not about her views. Other posters expressed agreement with her but in a much more reasonable view. The OP started a thread about what she clearly knew would be a contentious and traumatic subject, then flatly ignored people who wrote about their personal experience, and gave the impression that she didn't give a monkey's for anyone else's opinion because they're not professionals. Under the circumstances I think that's astonishingly rude.

FWIW if you look at the timing of my last 'flounce' post you'll see that it x-posted with the OP's apology.

I think that a few of you have been unfair to the op. Hers is a reasonable view, whether or not you agree with it. She wasn't being callous about people in that situation, and she withdrew gently, didn't flounce. There really is a danger that these sorts of threads sometimes risk being profoundly harmful to the op. It isn't callous to acknowledge that.

ROFL at Spero.

I don't think anyone was harassing the OP; she was being perfectly unreasonable, ignoring other people's opinions (so why post in the first place?), then, despite several people saying they have personal experience of suicide, she tried to pull rank by saying it's her job - what, and therefore that nullifies our opinions? . Outrageous. People are entitled to say that they think she's being out of order, and nobody's actually hurled insults at her, now, have they?

I have the solution. A thread for wannaBe and seeyounextetc called 'Have a Nice Cup of Tea and a Sit Down before Dwelling on your frankly Inappropriate Problems' - they can hide the rest. Sorted.

God, will you stop harrassing the op. She has apologised. She is not flouncing, she has asked for the thread to be deleted because it has caused so much upset.

She has a valid point (which some people, myself included, fully understand) and is allowed to ask a reasonable question.

Enough already.

who says the op is in the minority. Maybe there are others who feel this way but don't feel they can say so.

I hope the person who started the original thread ,does not see this one.She may now be worried about posting ,when at the moment she needs help.