MNet Newbie Guide - what would be your top piece advice on Mumsnet etiquette?

I agree with everything that's been said.

Also my own personal bugbear- if you go to register and it says username taken, this is not ebay. Please don't just add random numbers to that name. Or an extra bit like Too or Belle

Chances are that someone else has been happily using that name for many years and really won't appreciate suddenly being muddled up with someone with a totally different viewpoint.

Be daring. Choose something completely different

Don't go Peachy! I do actually miss the moldies and even had a dream about Cod returning (am sure she still posts on Style and Beauty )

Podrick not well known but v nice of you to say so

Ah but soon I will reach elder status and say join moldies I am tired of this LOL

Besides youa re very well known Pod are you not?

when starting a thread especially when with a request of some kind please acknowledge replies, it is only polite

Peachy how times have changed, you are indeed now at leader stage and I remember from way back you saying nobody ever mentioned you on the name mentioning type threads even though you had been around for yonks!

I am old and yet young because I keep name changing regularly! I regret not being in the running for leader/elder status but I value my anonymity too highly!

Accept that some people can post on the well over 1000 post long "Do not post on this thread" thread, but that you can't.....

Don't refer in your thread to MNers, with whom you are actually sharing a forum, as you or you all. It implies you're not part of it and gets my peoples' backs up.

Learn where to put apostrophe's apostrophes.

Not only should you use paragraphs in your posts....sentences are useful too.

People will mention big events that have happened in the past and you won't necessarily get it (judge flounce/SWMNBN/Moldies). Don't be put off/feel left out as pretty soon you will be involved in the next big event yourself.

Accept that some topics/thread titles will irrationally get your back up and you need to sit on your hands to avoid opening them and posting.

Remember that MN is more about the good stuff than the bad, even though the bad tends to eclipse eveything else for the short time it's happening.

Don't mention Gina Ford, rockets and Lebanon in the same post.

Where is mumsnet classics??

I normally sign off abc xx, i'll not do that again. Or......

Oh well I live and learn!

bolleux See I am neither.

If you think you are absolutely in the right BUT 950 posters disagree with you and the 3 who agree with you are people you wouldn't want to run in to in a dark alleyway - then you need to apologise quick!

Don't put pictures of pregnancy tests with faint lines on your profile - a line thats too faint to see in RL is certainly too faint to show up in cyberspace!

psst, slubber - Norman's cake! Now in my pics.

Don't make obscure references about something to someone you know, if no-one else will know what you are on about.

If you are going to start a thread that is really going to kick off, run to 1000+ posts, offend many and/or cause several oldies to leave, please ensure you give it an interesting title so that I don't ignore it because it looks boring and come back the next day to find out I have no idea what has been going on....

har at 'Try to be intellegent and amusing'

Don't accuse the Bar, the Tearoom or the Scuttlers of being cliques. Anyone is welcome in any of those threads.

Or so we keep being told!

Hi Slubber long time no see.

PLEASE DO NOT SHOUT.

Make no speeling or gramatical's errors.

'tis 'twas and twonk are perfectly acceptable.

If you post that your child has a temperature and is lethargic expect everyone to say 'A and E now for god's sake, do you want your child to die?'

If you post that you husband was 5 minutes late preparing your breakfast in bed, expect everyone to say 'What a fucking bastard twat, leave him now, it will only get worse'.

Try to be intellegent and amusing.

Do not expect anyone to notice.

Be prepared to give up life as you know it.

Have fun hun.

I forgot the most important one: keep a sense of humour.

Watusi do I know you? I do not believe we have been formally introduced, let alone gone down the thigh slapping alley.

TIP: don't slap mners unless you have a long and beautiful posting history, unless it's friday night, then anyone is fair game.

-Try not to mind if you're consistently ignored.
-Don't take anything too personally - MN is not RL, honestly! -You can just walk away when it all gets too much.
-Think before you post; never reply in a rage.
-Don't schmooze the popular/oldies.

• Temporary name change is a good idea if you're feeling vulnerable.
• If you post something that offends someone, (and if you have any opinions at all, you're bound to do this at some point), stage a diplomatic retreat/rephrase or stick to your guns as politely as possible.

** don't solicit practical advice about what to buy your maiden aunt for her 89th birthday or where to find a child's dressing gown with a belt that doesn't fall off, without bothering to say "thank you" for the 27 helpful replies that you have received

or even worse, just post and run ....

** don't tell someone who is depressed and doubting their mothering capabilities that they seem "inadequate" (something I read yesterday)

No, but it was one of the first threads that I read on MN and it certainly stuck in my mind.

And I still think of it when I see the poster's name

are you admitting to that, MmeLindt?

If you start a thread asking for opinions, particularly in AIBU, don't have a strop if people actually offer an opinion you don't agree with. If all you want is a bit of moral support, then say so!

Please think very carefully before posting on Special Needs threads, especially if you have no personal experience of what it is like to live in a family where one or more of the members has some kind of special needs.

Bit of 'live and let live' goes a long way on Mumsnet.

If you do something incredibly embarrassing DO come here and tell us about it.

But if you do and do not namechange, DON'T be surprised if 3 years later you are asked if you were the MNetter who left her knickers in her DS's lunchbox.