From MNHQ - we need your comments....

Dress codes like this always make me think of the comedy sketch:

"Hitler? Nice shiny shoes, nice smart hair cut - you're in.
Jesus? Long hair and sandals? Fuck off mate."

I think the nursery is wrong.
What worries me more is how some children are growing up so concerned about how they look from such a young age. You can see it all around, designer clad children, children who insist on designer labels, individual style should be exactly that, individual - it should not be what they wear or how they cut their hair that defines them. This problem in many cases now is not peer pressure but comes from the parents who start this from birth. Call me old fashioned I know!

Mine was usually dressed as a tiger at 3. I could have stopped him doing it but why?

He's 3. And he's been excluded for a haircut?

At 3 my DS was happy wearing Aurora's ball dress, he loved pink.

Crikey, if they can't have a bit of fun and play with their appearance when they are 3, when can they?

What on earth do the nursery think is going to happen?

Its madness I tell you! Madness!

My 3 year old wants to eat chocolate for breakfast. He also wants to wear my red nail varnish. But I don't let him.

Quite mp.

The mother might well be projecting her ideas of what is cool on her son, I don't know. But the nursery is definitely projecting their idea of what is smart on him too. No problem with a certain standard of dress - it should be practical and suitable for the weather. And I can see why they might want long hair tied back out of the way. But no matter how unpleasant the haircut in question might be it's not going to be a nuisance.

Personally, I would have said no to my 3 year old as they change their mind from oneminute to the next and a haircut will last a good few weeks. I don't think how they have their hair cut is the same as wanting to wear clashing/dressing up clothes as that is far more transitory.

However, I do think the nursery is being unreasonable - kids have years of dres codes at school, why does it have to strt as early as 3. As long as how their hair is cut/what they wear doesn't cause a safety risk, then they should be allowed to wear/have hair styles however their parents decide.

I'm surprised that people are slagging off the mother. My 3 year old wants to dress up like a fairy most of the time (including at nursery) and I let her. Why ever not? A hair cut is no different. I don't think it's necessary to impose dress codes on toddlers.

Ok. So the Nursery is part of a Primary School according to that article, with a uniform according to the picture. So, the Nursery would have a uniform code that fits in with the rest of the school (which the mother would have signed to say she agreed with when she accepted his place) Our school doesn't allow haircuts like that, so I'd imagine they'd frown on it if one of the Nursery kids in DDs class turned up like that. HOWEVER, excluding him was OTT. Couldn't they have just spoken to the Mother and asked her to make sure it wasn't cut like that again? It's only going to be a couple of weeks until it grows out (so probably the end of the Easter Holidays!) maybe if this was the third or fourth time she'd done it and ignored warnings, but first offence then out? Far too strict IMO.

I wonder if it was his decision to have his ear pierced too

I wouldn't take my ds to a nursery that had such strict dress codes but then I would persuade my ds against having a hairstyle that was so severe anyway. Pretty pathetic she couldn't say no - I would have thought distraction would have been the answer here however I wasn't there. I wonder does the Mother like that sort of hair style and wanted the the kid to look cool, same thing as earings for example?
My ds's nursery was all about self expression and it did him the world of good. Good job they didn't have a dress code as you can't imagine some of the get ups my ds turned up in - I distinctly remember his cross dressing phase
There's plenty of time for uniformal conformity but then there's plenty of time for fashion too

I think that the rule is too strict. There is something that doesn't sit quite right about a nursery dictating what hairstyles a 3 year old can have.

However, if the mother knew the rule then she should have abided by it. Giving in because her son wanted the haircut and she couldn't say no is not a good enough reason.

I think it is a shame when nurseries have strict dress codes - they are little children and it does seem completely ridiculous.

With older children I can understand schools
insisting on certain standards.

I think that if the mother was aware of the rules in the first place then she doesn't have any right to complain.

Not to mention day-glo and haircut-obscuring baseball hats when out and about

At all the nurserys I know they stick tabards on the kids for outings. Much more easily identifiable, and there is less risk of picking up some random kid who happens to be wearing a navy jumper on the way.

Ridiculous the exclude a 3 year old boy.

But the mother should definitely be ostracized for her bad taste.

It's not necessarily ridiculous to have a dress code.

One of the reasons is safety. All the children play in the local (municipal) park, in groups of 10-15 children. The fact that they must wear a navy blue coat with a coloured sash means that they stand out from all the other children in the park. Harder to snatch or lose one.

The school only loses a couple of children a year, so the code is working

A nursery with a dress code how ridiculous!!! What about little girls who have their ears pierced?

I can't get over this.

As childcare and educational professionals we are actively encouraged to accept people for who they are on the inside.

I could understand this with a much older child, but for a 3 year old...what message is this giving this little boy?

My daughter's school has uniform and a dress code, and I am fine with that. I have to be, because those are the rules.

If I don't like the school rules, I can send my daughter elsewhere.

Heavily lacquered hair could be a problem in chemistry lessons .....BANG!!!

Like I say, I agree about uniforms. I do not agree about dress codes.

'Long hair or heavily lacquered or gelled hair does become a h&s issue'

Erm, when?

If the nursery has a haircut code, then it should be expressly written out and parents need to sign up to it. Obviously any parent who doesn't want to sign up to it doesn't have to use that nursery.

If the nursery hasn't got a written haircut code, then they have no reasonable grounds on which to ban the child IMO.

Anyway the this is only a 3 year old, the mother can withdraw him and place him somewhere more accommodating of his desire to express himself.