Official Complaint to Mumsnet

-non binary person with a womb.

That's a woman.

Intern, is that you?

Two sugars in mine, please.

That’s why we’re glad to have been able to work with Smile Makers to create the first vibrator designed specifically for mothers

Does it self-combust if non-mothers use it?

The wording is perfectly fine, it's inclusive and those offended really do need to get a grip.

-non binary person with a womb.

Massive vibrator ad filled with the kind of dehumanising language we've been shouting about for years: 'anyone with a clitoris, 'people with vulvas', 'womb-havers'. On Mumsnet. Jesus fucking christ.

Outdated taboos like bullet pointing the features of a vibrator with a baby's bottle? Ick

but to also counter the outdated taboos and stereotypes that can lead to some women feeling embarrassed or ashamed about their sexual needs.

Would love to know what these are; why are they so coyly unspecified, is there some sort of taboo over mentioning them, MN? I'll caveat the following by saying that I have never given birth, but from reading these boards I have some idea about physical and mental post partum issues - and this seems to me another way of saying that 'yes, we know you are post partum and leaky and sore and sleep deprived and your OH is a lazy shit who does nothing but the MOST IMPORTANT thing is that you keep yourself sexy and tuned up and READY for when you can resume sex - and we have just the gadget!'

Yeah @justinemumsnet sure you said that, and a copywriter didn't write for you. Were you having an especially busy day when you OKd that strangulated wording? Endorsing what is clearly a confected marketing ploy, sitting - perfectly obviously - behind a transparent veneer of 'concern'.

The people who thought it might flog a few Shrek ears. I've been on the thread on site stuff to ask if MN will be as vigilant with trigger warnings in titles on that board as they are all the others.

People should definitely be able to use those boards for their intended purpose and all power to them.

But it seems deeply insulting to me that they would force people- without any consultation whatsoever- into seeing those topics in active just so they can crowbar in vibrator ad threads. Incredibly short sighted.

‘Gentle stimulation of the vulva’ sounds well annoying.

The biggest barrier to post-childbirth sex for me was, in order of magnitude, (1) healing of wounds, (2) utter fatigue, (3) being overwhelmed by my new responsibilities. None of which will be helped by Shrek's ear.

There was no taboo over discussion of sex, in my experience. My GP talked about it openly with me, my mum and other female relatives had open discussions and advice, all the mums I met with babies the same age as mine talked openly about it. My husband and I discussed it. There was no bloody taboo! I'm really angry about these people trying to create the impression of a taboo where there is none.

@ZeroFuchsGiven It's interesting that Justine uses the term women (as I would expect). I don't care about vibrator adverts given the frequent use of the word cunt on here but I care deeply about this language.

For those eye rolling that we are overreacting on this issue - It's the re-purposing and the dilution of the word "woman" that directly leads to a male rapist pretending to be one and gaining access to women's prisons - oh and applying to attend a self defence course for women who have been raped. Woman. It's an important word and we need to hang onto it, not give it away with a does it matter, be kind shrug.

Or “mummas” as they also term them on their Instagram. Vomit.

Sounds like the vibratory equivalent of a feathery stroker.

"The lack of conversation and resources on the topic is leaving mothers feeling side-lined as sexual beings."

Yeah right.

The lack of women not knowing how to turn themselves on, should they have a minute, is leaving the Shrek-ear feeling side-lined as a product without a market, more like.

So lets create the market by pretending women who've just had a baby are all "oh I can't remember how to do sex - I have all the time in the world but need to buy something to 'educate' me," and sell it to them shall we?

And they can't even used the word clitoris! FFs.

Wondering who the 500 moms are 👀

The baby bottles are deeply inappropriate

😂

Ultra gentle stimulation on the vulva sounds like the unsatisfactory attempts by a grotty teenage boy to ‘pleasure’ me when I was 17.

No, ta.

According to the ad, Justine has this to say.

Justine Roberts, founder of Mumsnet also commented, “Mumsnet has always been a place where women can share opinions, knowledge and advice on anything and everything, including sex. We hear frequently from women who are struggling to reconnect with their sexuality after having children, or who can’t find the support or information they need in order to do so.

“That’s why we’re glad to have been able to work with Smile Makers to create the first vibrator designed specifically for mothers. In doing so, we hope not only to enable women to reconnect with their sexuality more easily after childbirth, but to also counter the outdated taboos and stereotypes that can lead to some women feeling embarrassed or ashamed about their sexual needs.”

@SpottyBumPony i mean the animal but, obviously don’t want to offend Aunty Pony.

Me too! Sorry I wrongly included your post in mine above @SpottyBumPony

Sorry, that made me giggle.

What's with the ultra-gentle stimulation on the vulva for pain free exploration? We are fucking mothers, we have had to actually fuck to be mothers (most of us) and push out a baby at the end or manage a c-section while caring for a new born, why are you writing this creepy shit as if you are talking to innocent virgins?

And efficient pleasure in a short time? Efficient? How is pleasure efficient .

The whole thing reads like one big spoof.

It's as if it's not actually designed for women but for a much younger user.

It's just every shade of wrong.