war topic

You shouldn't expect others to use the forum in such a way as to avoid upsetting some.

Even with a war or Ukraine topic there will still be plenty posts in other parts of the forum about it. It's inevitable.

But then it encourages these who cannot go past a post, to become thread police as lecture others on where to post. That just derails threads.

I think part of it is that threads that get shared in the wider media are ones lifted from AIBU. So any new users go straight there and don't even realise there's other topics at all.
MN Talk= AIBU and that's it.

Well, perhaps you should! Get away from the AIBU/Chat 'ghetto' and see all the other wondrous topics that there are

But - just because you don't use Active Convos, it still doesn't mean that other topics are hidden. It just means you aren't seeing them.

FFS. It isn't hidden away! Now that I've posted on it, it will appear in Active Conversations

As has been pointed out, many people don't use Active conversations.

Myself included.

Why have we, as adults lost the ability to scroll past a thread that doesn't interest us or we don't want to read?

Because not all adults are the same and have the same feelings about things. And the thread titles alone can be quite alarmist so the scaremongering starts with that.

Maybe a Ukraine topic rather that 'War' would be a shout.

If you don't like it don't read it!

It's all very well saying threads would still be in most active, but in my experience (covid boards) they do get lost a bit. That's why people post in aibu- for traffic

Which is then a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Or are you simply an AIBU warrior?

The problem is, and this happened with the covid board, is it encourages thread police. The thread is the derailed with posts of "why did you post this here, there is a war board".

Also not all posts concerning Ukraine are deserving of being in a "war" board so there will be just as many threads popping up. Read one last night that was all about ways to support the people of Ukraine - the best charities to donate to for example. Others will be about gas prices rising which will undoubtedly discuss the conflict. Discussing sanctions being placed on Russia and the possibility of sanctions against Russian individuals.

It's topical, rightly so. It should be allowed to be discussed in any board the thread creator wants to create the post.

Will there be posts scaremongering and/or people who are thinking worst case scenario? Yes. But much better they are in the most popular areas so any scaremongering can be called out and people can get some reassurance.

It's all very well saying threads would still be in most active, but in my experience (covid boards) they do get lost a bit. That's why people post in aibu- for traffic.

Why have we, as adults lost the ability to scroll past a thread that doesn't interest us or we don't want to read?

And if this was posted on AIBU, I bet MN would move it to Site Stuff as people would complain that it should be in Site Stuff

I bet many people don't know there is a Site Stuff topic discussing this now.

If this was on AIBU or Chat, I bet we would see much more discussion on both sides.

But this thread is itself hidden away so only a select few who know about Site Stuff or have actively searched for it are having their voices heard.

Re. anxiety/hiding away, I think there are two related issues here, similar to what @merrymouse said above:

1. The prospect of war is very frightening for a lot of people, and they don't necessarily want to be reminded of it every time they log into MN for breastfeeding advice or to moan about their MIL. You could argue that this is their own problem to deal with and that learning about major world events is still important, and ordinarily I'd agree, however:

2. Most of the threads at the moment are not informative - they're full of people talking about the inevitability of nuclear war, will they be conscripting women or just men, would your children fight Russian tanks if they were on your local high street or would they run away like cowards etc etc. A new mum with a disabled child started a thread on Thursday looking for reassurance that her family in London would be safe, and people were replying with Nukemap screenshots saying "don't worry, you'll all be dead before you even know it".

This is exactly the kind of shit that isn't helpful for people who are already scared, nor is it of any benefit to anyone else. It doesn't help people understand what's going on - if anything it muddies the waters more - and all it achieves is spreading mass panic (or irritation, depending on your temperament). I don't know whether the answer is heavier moderation, a separate board or something else, but I don't see any advantage to just leaving them, except temporarily to see if they blow over of their own accord.

I think there's a perception of anxious people on MN as middle-class mummies sobbing and shaking because someone offered their PFB a non-organic granola bar, and while some posters certainly do give that impression, I also think it's important to remember it's not the only reason why people might want to have some control over when they're confronted with distressing news stories. This is a site where women (mostly) come for support during times of their life when they're feeling particularly vulnerable anyway, e.g. pregnancy/postpartum, after rape, after DV, when a family member is seriously ill and so on. Some posters will also have lived through wars or terror attacks themselves or lost friends or family to violence. If they don't want to see reminders of the topic every time they come to the site, that doesn't make them pathetic or incapable of coping with reality of the world. I think some people are being quite dismissive of others' genuine issues here.

The Ukraine threads in AIBU aren't even asking AIBU now.

Some people will only look at AIBU

Which is a shame really, there's lots of Topics out there. But they want to see bunfights about MILs and parking, trolls and the next Penis Beaker presumably?

[quote Parpophone]@cakeorwine

You do know that not everyone looks at MN in the same way?

Some people will only look at AIBU

I look at "last day" and when I clicked on that at 1055 (UK time) there were 16 different threads about the war. So your list may be "hardly dominating", but maybe if you clicked "last day" you would see something completely different.

It will be different for everyone. I have numerous topics hidden as they are of no interest to me.

From other comments on this thread, it seems that many people aren't even aware that there are lots of different topics to choose from. Maybe that's why they don't see the need for a new one.[/quote]
I know.

There are people who say they use Active to find conversations and they said that Active had a lot of Ukraine conversations. Which it doesn't.

If you use AIBU, then it's easy not to open a conversation about Ukraine. By not opening it.

If a bloke tells a bloke to calm down then is -- why not?

Omg, PP argues that those words addressed to a female person can only have one interpretation ever? This is very nuts blinkered thinking.

@cakeorwine

You do know that not everyone looks at MN in the same way?

Some people will only look at AIBU

I look at "last day" and when I clicked on that at 1055 (UK time) there were 16 different threads about the war. So your list may be "hardly dominating", but maybe if you clicked "last day" you would see something completely different.

It will be different for everyone. I have numerous topics hidden as they are of no interest to me.

From other comments on this thread, it seems that many people aren't even aware that there are lots of different topics to choose from. Maybe that's why they don't see the need for a new one.

I agree that if it all dies down to one or two long running threads, there is no need for a separate topic.

There is 1 thread in Active out of the top 20 this morning.

Hardly dominating....

@lljkk really? The dumbest? Dumber than you not being able to follow a converataion about 8 posts long?

I was referring to the 'calm down' that's told to women, when they disagree with anyone (men or women). It is misogynistic.

But you couldn't be arsed to follow it. Just took something out of context. Well done you! Have a medal.

I don’t think moving threads to a dedicated topic area is censorship in this case, because it should make threads easier to find.

It’s not as though this is a niche issue only being discussed on MN, or as though the active threads in AIBU are reliable sources of information.

There's a nice alarmist one about flying this morning.

I don't believe in censorship but I do think Mumsnet should be moderating the threads in a better way. I think I might need to step away for a bit

Agree.