what ever happened to the This Is my child campaign?

Ah, and this thread reminds me why I decided to stick to posting about favourite cleaning products and Gareth Malone.

I'm out.

I think it was to rina

I can't work out who you're aiming that at rina.

Was the that to me bishop? Sorry if I've offended you

oooook.....

It's important for all of us not to take sides. That's what we have a legal system for - to have people dedicated to look at all the evidence and make the decision that seeks most likely to be right.

rina, I don't think anyone whether disabled themselves or a parent of a disabled child can say with certainty they can speak for what children or adults with PMLD would want who can't speak for themselves or form the thoughts to express.

My relative can't see, doesn't know who anyone is, can't understand any language, or speak. He has profound damage to huge areas of his brain. But he laughs when he feels a water spray and enjoys eating a strawberry. Who are we to say that is worth nothing? Parents of disabled children know them best and in most circumstances are their best advocates.

The court decide what is right for CG but I don't think anyone without access to the full evidence before the court can say what the outcome should be.

Who is pretending to be 'The Queen of Disablism'?

Many parents of children with a disability on MN have disabilities of their own.

I am a judge. It's a terrible terrible situation for all to be in. People take sides yet forget that.

It's really taking the piss to pretend you are the queen of disablism just because you have a disabled child

The real disablism is everyone saying "well my child is disabled" and thinking about "well if I had a disabled child"

you're fucking irrelevant. Your opinions are stupid. You're not disabled. Go away

Can you imagine if parents of gay people were the ones to decide what's homophobic? White parents of mixed people to decide what's racist. Gay people trying to say "no, no you're wrong" and shouted down by straight parents of gay people, "you're the homophobes!!!!!" How ridiculous. That's what you are doing. That's how it feels as a disabled woman. A disabled woman - not a mother of a disabled child. I'm actually what anti-disablism is for, you are not, your child is but you are not.

You're all thinking "no don't kill my precious baby child" - which is absolutely fine. That's pretty normal. I don't have a problem with that strong feeling that you have.

I have a problem with you acting like disabled children should be kept alive to amuse their parents, and that anyone who thinks otherwise is obviously hitler and not, you know, disabled themselves? Or simply having empathy for disabled people, not seeing them as aliens?

You are always, always thinking about yourself as a parent of disabled children, never as a disabled person (because you're not - and you don't think you could become one). That's disablism

Oh come on, Sam was accused of being a troll for giving a different view. There are posts saying if people aren't comfortable with the discussion they shouldn't be there.

Anne 👍🏻

There is a reason no one who thinks differently is posting on there - look at the responses when they do.

'But many haven't. They are obsessing.'

So are you 'obsessing' about CG threads? No. You are sharing an opinion. I cba to AS but I would guess it's not the 1st time you or others have shared it?

What you find on mn whether it's, for example, parking or breastfeeding the same thing gets said over and over again. It doesnt mean it's the same 'obsessed' people. It's the same discussion that is all.

Sooo........balance them?

Agree with Noeuf and Anne.

If the threads were balanced there would be more people putting the alternative case.

How is that disablist, though? Fair enough not to like long running series threads about one subject, but it doesn't mean they are disablist. Might be annoying, might be something you disagree with and wouldn't post on yourself, but that's all. Personal opinion, innit.

So glad I'm not the only one who feels like this about the CG thread. I can't read it anymore.

I have a close family member who has PMLD and some of the language used about quality of life is hard to read.

Also hard as parent of a dc with SEN to read the way the parents are spoken of.

Agree with Noeuf

Oh come off it. Some people are posting all the time on the threads; they noticed the mum had stopped her FB page (why look?) and there's constant visiting of the FB Charlie's army page just to get outraged at what's posted. And then all the 'of how terrible if he's made a ward of court/if they have to be dragged from his bedside' - I think obsessive and fake is a pretty good summary

'So EVERYONE posting cyclically on 13 threads is in that situation?'

No. I said many.

I didn't see any obsessive fake concerns on the threads I read. It's a high profile tragic case, people will have an opinion . That does not make them nasty, fake or obsessive.

So EVERYONE posting cyclically on 13 threads is in that situation?

Those who are and have been in that situation there are no words.

But many haven't. They are obsessing.

'The threads arnt nice, they have a nasty , slightly obsessive undertone and like Noef says full of fake concern.'

I don't like them because I think it's all been said. So I don't go on them . I don't however think they are 'nasty' 'obsessive' or 'full of fake concerns'. I think that's a shit thing to say about people, many who are bereaved or have experience of life limiting illness, sharing their thoughts about a tragic case.

Well said Dixie

for anyone who's lost a child