MNHQ - are they disabilist?

Not really Pag - For me at least I'd suggested being sneery doesn't help. That's just a global lesson re communication and changing hearts and minds, n'est-ce-pas?

That's what I was thinking Pag but I couldn't get it right in my head so deleted by bungled attempt at saying it.

PanCan... I didn't post that in order to get more information about you. I posted it to try to explain why Bourdic posts in the way she does.

She didn't get much empathy on the last thread and part of your previous post sounded very much like the posts that so exasperated her before.

She is angry. Very angry. My best advice is not to try to placate her or to explain why her anger irritates or upsets you. Don't try to explain you understand as you know people, have close relatives who are disabled. YOU ARE NOT, she is and she has been pissed of beyond her current ability to cope with it at all pleasantly!

Just accept it. She is one righteously pissed off disabled woman who has, currently, ceased to give a fuck who she offends!

I think there is a suggestion that the OP needs to be nice in order to get heard,

That worried me rather.

She could be a monstrous twat but if her issue is right then it's right.

Let's not suggest she needs to smile and ask nicely because that gets in to very uncomfortable territory doesn't it?

OB - I didn't say it to appear to 'mean well' at all. If Bourdic wishes to interpret anything I type in any particular way then that's not my issue.

Are MN disablists? I have a bit of a radar on that, and I don't agree they are.

I do to OurBlanche

The deleted thread was disgraceful full of faux outrage and offense to divert attention away from the actual issue.

I also say that as a person with immediate family/v close friendship 'families' members over decades who are disabled i.e. severely autistic, Downs, and a wheel chair user. (3 different children and adults).
So losing a potentially empathic platform is a concern.

That's what started the last bunfight, PanCan.

Bourdic was frustrated, sarcastic, caustic and was absolutely flamed for it.

You may say That is so poor and think you mean well. But Bourdic is absolutely fucking furious at years worth of issues compounded by a thread full of people turning the issue from her being pissed off with being marginalised because she is disabled to berating her for daring to be, not only disabled, but rude, caustic, sneery and otherwise human, angry and on here to vent.

I doubt she will read your admonition in anything other than a patronising light. And I, for one, quite agree with her.

I think that because of a sneeringness in her post about being disabled. That's so poor. She would appear to be v well able in a debate but reduces it to something less worth while. One doesn't engage people as a rhetoritician by being sneery to your audience.

Bourdic - you've just lost a fair few potential 'supporters' there. if I may say.

Why? She's frustrated at being marginalised and being made to feel like she's invisible because she's disabled. She's started a thread challenging MNHQ about their lack of engagement with her and they have come onto the thread twice to comment and on both occasions have responded to posts by other posters, not her.

Disabled or otherwise, you are being ridiculous Bourdic

Bourdic - you've just lost a fair few potential 'supporters' there. if I may say.

op have you emailed and asked Mnhq why your thread was deleted?

I really don't think HQ are disablist, no.

Threads that have descended into bun fights (where the mods can't keep up with all the deletions that would be necessary) are deleted all the time. Ops of the threads do not receive an explanation.

OP, why would you think that MN is disabilist as an approach? What would be their/our benefit from that. It would reduce the MN population.

Surely then MNHQ should have said to OP it was deleted because people were being vile to her then?

It did turn into a really stupid bunfight.

There were posters determined to make you wrong, Bourdic. It was quite vile in places. In others the foaming at the mouth was ridiculous, posters stretching a point far beyond logic to find insult.

I popped on to report one poster to find one of those "oh dear, it really isn't Mumsnet" messages and came very close to contacting them to have a rant on your behalf.

But please, do remember, the squeaky wheel gets the grease... and the squeakiest wheels were probably those who fought hardest to find insult in your quite understandable ire.

Bourdic I think they owe you an email of explanation as to why your thread was deleted (while others are left to stand).

They were much better at deleting for a while. Not just now. Have been called deranged and a poor parent and having my head up my arse without it being deleted. Although being called a twat and told to fuck right off was at least. Small mercies.

As a side issue, there are some absolute arseholes on here ATM .