What would you say to your 15 year old self?

1. Don't give up your male mates for your bf
2. In fact don't pick that bf, ask the one that got away, there was a window there woman!
3. Work at your physics and biology, stop coasting
4. Wear a bra and a supportive sleep bra, wash them by hand
5. You will be out of there in three years, that's no time, so ignore the crap at home
6. Don't put up with the bullying cah at school, tell staff or call her on her threats and fight back
7. Ditch the bleach blonde, the orange foundation, the blue eyeshadow and the shoulder pads
8. If you insist on choosing the wrong bf, don't feel pressurised to do anything too soon
9. Don't go out with your gf, she is setting you up for a blind date from hell

I'd want to tell my 15 year old self that yes, you're right, you are a daddy's girl - find him and tell him before it's too late. You'll never be close to your mum. Please, please do your coursework!

Move out of your mothers house as soon as you start earning real money.
Never go back.
I'm serious, get a flat share, see the world, get the hell out of there and do NOT internalise all the things you have been told that you 'are'. Because you are none of those things.

He doesn't even like you, he is a pervert - he abused you when you were 12. Do not get sucked in by the bastard again he will rob your childhood.

Don't sleep around. It would have been very nice if dh was the one and only.
Oh and marry for money

Get a job in engineering, not PR.

Dear 15yo Mo, Dad has Aspergers. This doesn't mean he doesn't love you - he does. But it does mean you will never feel loved, or understood, or approved of, by him. So don't base A level, uni and career choices on attempting to do what he thinks is right. Don't confuse disinterest with love, or sex with interest. Don't fool yourself into pretending you don't want intimacy, love, a family, friends and support - you do. If you wait till you're 46 to find this out, you will have missed the chance to have children, a good marriage and the right career.

Don't do the three sciences for o level. You will fail to be able to even use the calculator correctly. Try harder with Spanish. Work really hard. Do law. Don't drink so much in your 20s.

Mind you if I'd done that I'd not have this life and I'm pretty content.

You are beautiful, inside and out.

You don't need to know what you want to do, but go to uni anyway.

Stay away from 25 yr old men who think it's ok to shag 17 yr old girls. He is a gigantic LOSER and you are better than him and he knows it. Don't internalise that you are unlovable and no good in bed because he dumps you for his ex after taking your virginity.

Stop wasting your money on crap, save up and go travelling like you dream of.

Leave behind your "best " friend. She is manipulative and selfish and only likes you because you shore up her incredibly low self-esteem.

Wash your hair!

You're academically ahead of everyone in your school.

Don't feel weird about it. It won't last. You're a big fish in a very small pond.

And when the head of the Rhodes Scholarship selection committee says, 'It's very hard for girls to get this scholarship - we advise you not to proceed with your application', don't just accept it and walk away. (If nothing else, kick him in the balls and run.)

Do what you want, and ask for what you want. Plenty of people won't like you whatever you do, sometimes that is because of you, quite often it is because of them.

Get treatment for depression. It will waste your youth otherwise.

Dear teenGrey,

You were in no way responsible for the misery at home; you're mum and dad needed to sort out their own shit, it wasn't your responsibility, same goes for your brother, you can still love him without having to do everything for him, or be his saviour.

The last two years of school might have felt like they went on forever, but they went in a flash. Those so called friends were actually small minded bullies and you soon got over them.

Depression is a crippling illness but you will get through it, this time and twice again in the future.

You are going to meet the most incredible man in the next year and he is going to be the man you marry, who will transform your life and bring so so much joy. He will make you feel so good about yourself and what the future has in store.

And be kinder to yourself, you deserve it.

Love 31year old Grey xx

Step away from the boy, he will bring you years of heartache and is not worth your devotion. He is an abusive loser who ends up in prison anyway.

Stop smoking, stop drinking. Go to school everyday, not just when you feel like it and build a circle of real friends, not those girls who pressure you into the drinking and smoking.

Be nicer to your mum, she loves you and will be your best friend and biggest supporter when you leave that boy and start living your life at last.

You know the guy you are in love with? She's a girl. Only with a young man's body (right now). When she asks you about liking dressing up in women's clothing, try not to freak out too much. She is going through a harder time than you can possibly imagine.

Ignore the people who say you wouldn't enjoy a psychology degree.

Howto

don't worry about the girls in school who are leaving you out. stop trying to fit in all the time, just focus on the things you like doing instead, and studies, instead of trying to make people like you. its not worth it. go and talk to someone about your self confidence- you can get help, you don't need to be on your own all the time with problems. one day you will have loads of friends and be really confident and won't be able to shut up. focus on doing well, don't waste this time being unhappy. oh, and puberty is normal. it doesn't mean ur fat. everyone gets boobs and puts on a few pounds - yours just came a bit later. its fine. stop fighting it.

Go to catering college.

Your eyebrows are too high to be so thinly plucked; with eyeshadow on, you look like a clown.
You are prettier than you know.

Keep your legs closed and don't go out with that bloke you just met; he's not a good person and will cause you years of traumatic memories.

If you listen to all of this (not the eyebrows), your life will probably be so much better.

Tell your mum what your dad is doing. It might not help, but at least you'll know where she stands, instead of always wondering.

Go to the police, not the church.

Force your parents to take your little sister to hospital when she stops getting out of bed. She's not exaggerating or making a fuss, she's really sick, and maybe she won't die later if she gets seen now.

Life will get a lot better. A lot. Just get you and your siblings through childhood. Show them you love them more.

you are NOT fat!

Your mother is wrong and you DO NOT need to loose ant weight.

You're beautiful. Believe that.

Also stop shagging questionable boys from the rough end of town, shagging someone DOES NOT make someone want to be your boyfriend.......

You're worthy.

Ah, some bittersweet memories here.

I'd say to my 15 year old self: Keep going. Life is a bit tough at the moment, but it's going to get a hell of a lot harder quite soon. Be prepared! You will find you do have the strength to pull yourself up, work harder and achieve some amazing things that you can look back on, smile and be proud.

It's good to smile, so try it now and again.

Forty is too late to get laser eye surgery done.

Put more effort in to your school work and forget about boys.
Be true to yourself and don't try to be something your not.

Forget about bloody boys!

Use some bloody contraception! Don't be so delighted when the cool guy pays attention to you that you forget that...