Can you tell me what the score is with posting a thread and saying you're only wanting it up for a while then you're going to get it deleted?

I don't think I have ever seen it before, I have requested a thread be deleted when I posted more details than I had intended. MN did not delete and that's fine.

It seems to be a big enough problem to you that you've started a thread about it.

I think you have to accept that mn is not there to allow you to start a thread which will only be up for 30mins on a sunday.

So the OP in that case should have realised that it wasn't exactly a massive priority for mn to delete it on a sunday afternoon.

I don't think mn would want to encourage the site being used like that really - but the odd deletion if privacy really impacted should of course be deleted.

I've requested deletion before, although not a whole thread, and MNHQ have obliged.

But old threads are useful - I've not started two threads in the last couple of days because I've been able to find old discussions. So deleting them just because the OP has no further use to them misses the point rather.

Of course there comes a point where the needs of the OP in particular outweigh the interests of the membership as a whole, but that's generally pretty rare, and shouldn't form the basis of an OP.

It hardly ever happens though does it? Not a massive problem, surely?

If HQ have changed their deletion policy , maybe they should amend the talk guidelines to say 'just ask if you want your thread deleted'

I said in my post didn't I? Because you're desperate for input or advice and it feels worth the risk.

I agree with Latte. Why on earth should a thread that could be potentially damaging to the OP's life hang around just because you took five minutes out of your day to post on it? How incredibly self centred. This is supposed to be a supportive space and on occasion this may happen. As for the "well they should have thought of that before they posted" What if they're desperate for input and have no one in RL to talk it over with? Should they just stay away and not seek help so you won't lose out on your exciting update?

This "we wasted our time posting" thing really makes me as well. You're messing around in an Internet forum, if you weren't posting on that thread, you'd be on another, why is YOUR time more important than an OP's well being?

I think it's exactly what's happening actually.

I think the official stance is something like -

'We aren't going to delete a thread every time a poster gets the hump because the thread didn't go their way, but at the same time if it's genuine and you want it gone, we will do it for you, but don't make a habit of it.'

I think it's preferable to know that MN will delete a thread if you ask them to.

This website is supposed to be 'By parents, for parents' for support & advice etc

It's prime objective isn't 'for the titillation of others' or a 'soap box'.

I don't see anything wrong in what the OP of that thread did or said. I think it's a good option to have. She should & would have been able to get a general feeling of if SWBU or not in a few hours with little risk of her family & friends reading it.

Sometimes you can change enough details to make it alright to put it under another name and not worry, but other times it's going to be very clear to anyone knowing you that it's you posting and it could cause a lot of upset.

I've been on a few threads which the OP has stated will be deleted and it is annoying when you've bothered to reply

So, why then, do you want to do the same thing?

Maybe we should have a 12 hours only topic! I didn't see the problem with that thread even if the members of the family saw it. The op was venting but apparently saying the same as what she had said to her family anyway!

I agree with that, Owl.

When I have posted about very identifying situations I have always namechanged.

IMO, if you say "I'm worried someone in RL will see this" you should probably have realised that before starting the thread.

It sounds like it came under privacy issues. It's always been the case that if you say "I'm worried someone in RL will see this (especially "someone specific in RL")" the thread gets deleted with no questions asked. It's just ones which don't go as the OP hoped or which turn bunfighty which don't get deleted just because. Which I think is a good policy. I've been on forums where someone posted, got given good advice and then deleted their thread because they'd solved the problem (instead of leaving it for others to see!) or deleted it in a hissy fit because they got a "dislike" or downvote.