Come and talk to us (and Gransnetters) about the perimenopause

Anodomini from Gransnet

"Hot flushes were the only symptom I had, but it was a hot summer and I could never be sure if it was me or the weather - and they only happened in bed at night! In any case, they were over by the time autumn came along".

Elegran from Gransnet
"You save a lot on central heating and blankets too. Until the OH complains. He won't like it when you decline a nice cosy cuddle either".

JessM from Gransnet
"You just feel too bloody hot Morriszapp and convinced the room is too warm. In work you mutter "is it hot in here or is it me?" and elegantly peel off your outer layer (which needs to undo down the front - struggling to escape from a wooly jumper tends to make one bad tempered and a tad panicky).
Or if your corporate culture permits it you say "Hang on a minute chaps, I'm having another sodding hot flush - can we just take a 2 minute break while i go and stick my head under the tap"
I reckon they are good for the complexion - that extra oxygen etc pumping into your skin. "

Oldgreymare from Gransnet

"To lazypepper..... I had a tendency to greasy skin particularly the 'T' zone, since the menopause my skin has dried significantly. My friends tell me I ought to use moisturisers (some of you will be throwing your hands up in horror, that I don't) but, since as a teenager, a tendency to become spotty if I put anything on my face, I just cannot get the hang of it!
I have, tho, graduated to a 'dry skin face wash' from a brand which offers 3 types.
I do use a lotion on my legs which have also become very dry.....
GNHQ..... can I mention brand names?"

Elegran from Gransnet

"MorrisZapp It varies from one person to another, in intensity and in how often it strikes, so a description is a bit vague. Mostly they only last a few minutes each.

It is like an embarrassed blush that covers the whole body, bringing a lot of blood to the skin and making you feel very hot, as though you are in a room with the heating turned up unbearably high, with no chance of leaving.

It is not necessarily obvious to anyone else, so if you can ignore it and concentrate on the job in hand, no need to hide in the loos. If not, going and splashing water on the face (and/or down the cleavage, if that is feasible) can help. Keeping a bottle of water to hand and drinking a good slug can help to make you feel cooler, so can wearing layers of light clothes so that you can remove some (don't strip off completely though - that can lead to further complications socially)

At home you can open all the windows and strip off as much as you like, in that order if your windows are overlooked, take a cold shower, have an iced drink".

My skin started drying out during the perimenopause - mid 40s onwards. I am now 52 and rarely if ever get spots, plus my skin is smoother than some women my age, I think because it was always so oily.

I'm still having periods but the last one was a couple of months ago so I'm wondering if this is it. I suddenly started on the hot flushes about a month ago. They seem to be triggered by the usual things (spicy food, wine , hot drinks) but also by emotion - if I feel a bit embarrassed or angry, that now seems to morph into a hot flush. They vary in intensity: sometimes they are not noticeable at all to other people, but at other times my face goes very very red. I think they are worse if I am already feeling a bit hot for external reasons like the weather or an overheated room.

One of the worst things is waking up slick with sweat, throwing off the duvet, getting cold as the sweat evaporates, getting under the duvet again, having another hot flush as a result ... and so on ... Also, during a hot flush I'm getting a horrible stinging sensation moving up the front of my body (a colleague has the same sensation but in her back). I'm having about 12 flushes a day at the moment. If it carries on like this I can see myself going for HRT even though I'm really not keen.

I didn't phrase my question very well. Sorry.

I meant to say - if you have an oily skin, does it dry out after menopause?

How does your skin go after menopause?

Having suffered with varying degrees of acne since being a teenager - I am hoping for some reprieve once i get into or past menopause?

Am currently 46 - and still have the skin of a teenager, but with a few added wrinkles and crepiness.

I'm feeling quite lucky in that my periods just seem to have stopped, haven't had one for 10 months now but still remain prepared at all times.Also my hot flushes are annoying but not incapacitating, just the joint pain, tiredness, weight gain and hairiness which again are just annoying.

Agree with these grand net comments. I was fine, as I said upthread. No loss of libido, no other symptoms you could ascribe to it really.

Periods one month, then a couple of alternate months, and that was it.

I agree it isn't worth stressing in advance.

Sorry to post without reading the rest of the thread to see if my questions have been answered.

I have had a short cycle for the last ten years (24/5 days), had a baby through IVF three years ago, and am now getting cycles which vary from between 21 days (Sobs) to 30 days. My periods are REALLY heavy.

I wondered if this is a symptom of the peri-menopause?

I think hot flushes can be different for different people, mine are not noticeable to anyone but me. I get a hot feeling rush that starts at my feet and wooshes up to my head but I don't sweat or go red. I can carry on with my job easily although it's uncomfortable it doesn't affect my ability.
It feels almost more like a rush of adrenaline so can leave me a bit tired for a while.

Can anybody describe what happens during a hot flush? If it happens at work, do you have to hide in the loos? Do you need to lie down?

Thank you one and all.

I'm 43 and am definitely changing. My mood swings have been off the scale and although I know I'm being unreasonable it's very difficult to control them (I was really ready to kill anyone who came near me a couple of months ago and had to take myself off!), but I don't like it. I have started taking Agnus Castus which has been making me feel better, but it doesn't seem widely available now (I'd bought it a while ago and not bothered taking it).

Anyway, it's great to know that there's support out there. Sounds silly really when all our peers are going through it too, but you know what I mean!

I think there should be a thread for post menopausal women only to post on to say what happened in the end.

I posted many panicky threads on the Menopause Matters website (very good) at the time but am post menopausal now and feeling pretty good but older but then I am older. It's 5 years since I came off HRT and to be honest I feel great really. A bit more forgetful, a bit stiffer, but a bit more selfish (not feeling obliged to put others first) which is a good thing and a bit more happier.

So a reassuring thread where postms can explain that yes, some of the side effects weren't nice but if I'd known how long they were going to last I'd not have complained so loudly!

I'm definitely in the throes of perimenopause and have been for several years now.

I'm one of the ones who periods become closer together and heavier. However I'm also one of the lucky ones with a female GP my own age. I was put on a course of Ferrous fumarate to rectify my anaemia, which had got pretty scary by the time I went to see my doctor, and Tranexemic acid to control the heavy blood loss. I actually had my review appointment today, I've come away with instructions not to worry about the anaemia any more as it's gone (which I'd realised, as I was no longer falling asleep on the sofa at the drop of a hat) but to keep on with the Tranexamic acid. The pills are ENORMOUS, you need a whisky glass of water to knock each one back and my dose is four! However they are absolutely brilliant, I've gone from needing to change sanpro every half hour to one normal towel lasting 12 hours. And the dose is on days one, two and three of the cycle, so I still get 23 days drug free (26 day cycle)

The hot flush shite is a PITA, thanks Gransnetters upthread for some ideas on how to cope with it.

Thanks EmilyAlice. I'm off to beg my GP for HRT...

Thanks everyone. I'm off to my GP next week to ask about HRT as I'm definitely perimenopausal now and my mum had an early menopause so I'm concerned about my bone health.

The first sign for me was my thyroid going hyper and then hypo. I also started to get a few hot flushes which stopped when I started taking Agnus Castus. I now take the Black Cohosh and Chasteberry Herbal Tincture from Fushi Wellbeing which is amazing.

My last period consisted of horrendous flooding. I thought it would never stop and was thinking of going to A&E but thankfully it did.

Im so pleased and grateful to have found this thread.

My hot flushes started about 6 months ago and I was hoping I could get through without HRT but Im finding it so hard, especially when it happens in a business meeting, I feel so vulnerable. My libido has disappeared and when we do have sex its very painful. I also ache although I am trying to ignore that and have upped my exercise regime.

All in all its pretty horrible, and I have had to reduce my wine intake

My mum who is 76 still gets flushes so its never going to go away.

I have been to my GP and have a packet of Prempak C waiting for me to take but I keep looking at them and haven't opened the pack yet.

trouble is not everyone can have HRT or the pill. sure the benefits will outweigh the risks for most but the risks are real and i think it would be reckless not to make people aware. i don't think that is about being anti women. the pill after all creates as much if not more benefit to men than it does women and does indeed have health risks when effectively used condoms are just as safe and do not risk women's health.

Q: (especially to anyone who had had a lot of problems with pms triggering mental health problems - re: severe rather than just a bit bleurgh and to those unable to use HRT).

the pill really helped my pmt problems and made a huge difference to my mental health until a savvy young doctor picked up on the fact that i had a history of aura migraine and so should not be taking the pill at all due to a double whammy stroke risk. this means that when the time comes HRT is ruled out for me also.

i suppose my concern is having had hormonally related mental health problems in my late twenties through to mid 30's which now are relatively settled (via anti depressants and taking agnus castus ((highly recommended - has taken me from cycles between 38-48 days long with weeks of pmt before they arrive to on average 30-33 day long cycles with minimal pmt)) and possibly just getting past the big fertility drive hormone stage) does that mean i'm likely to have all hell break lose again when the menopause era hits?

also if i can't take the pill or hrt what options will be available to me? i can't even use the mini pill which would have been safer stroke risk wise because progesterone turned me even more crazy and suicidal - joy

so yes if anyone with mental health issues with a hormonal edge to them has been through menopause i'd love to hear their experiences and i would also seriously recommend high dose agnus castus to all women with any issues around their cycle or the menopause - in some countries it's actually prescribed for everything from pcos to pms to heavy periods. it works upon the pituatory gland and has honestly been a miracle for me.