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Come and talk to us (and Gransnetters) about the perimenopause

106 replies

RowanMumsnet · 23/05/2014 09:55

Hello

As most of you will know, we've got a sister site, Gransnet, which recently celebrated its third birthday Cake.

GNers have a wealth of experience in areas that some MNers may only just be starting to think about, or experience personally, and we thought it might be interesting (and, hopefully, fun Grin) to open up a conversation between the members of the two sites on some of these topics.

One issue that leapt out at us (or, perhaps more accurately, sidled up to us gradually as we entered the prime of life) is the perimenopause: a period of time before and after the transition into the menopause, when women may start to experience symptoms such as irregular periods, sleeplessness, changes in sex drive and vaginal dryness/itching, emotional ups and downs and so on. (Or may not, of course!)

Lots of GNers have been there and done that so far as the menopause is concerned, so we thought this might be a useful opportunity for MNers to ask some them any questions you may have, and for members of both sites to share some experience, hard-won knowledge and support.

Of course there will be MNers who know lots about the menopause and perimenopause, and GNers who have yet to experience either, so feel free to ask, answer, or both.

There's a parallel thread running on Gransnet; we'll cross-post some questions and answers between the two, but do get yourself a Gransnet log-in and pop over to say hello if you fancy it.

So... what have you always wanted to know about the perimenopause, but have been too afraid to ask?

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Danielle2017 · 03/11/2017 20:03

I am 46 years old. I got my period and once my period ended it turned to staining now for 17/18 days. So basically in 17/18 days I have been having a period or staining. So its day 17/18 and I believe my staining turned back to a period again. Had a sono done 6 months ago with good lining. Went to obgyn and he said he thought it was hormonal and not cancer but worried. He was waiting to do a sono until things calmed down. Any experience you have had would be helpful and appreciated!

RowanMumsnet · 07/07/2014 10:03

Just popping back to say thanks very much for all the comments, questions and input from MNers and GNers on here - we think it was a really useful and interesting discussion and hope you do too. There does seem to be an appetite for more information and support on this area.

We'll be thinking about possible other collaborations with GN soon so please watch this space.

OP posts:
50KnockingonabiT · 24/06/2014 12:30

Thanks for replying:)

I haven't looked into HRT, I should do some research.

Forgot to mention the lack of sleep too, as if I haven't enough to contend with. I think I'd have a better outlook if I wasn't so damn tired all the time.

Far, you have my sympathy, it's flipping hard work:(

TheFarSide · 22/06/2014 22:50

Re HRT, does it not just postpone all the symptoms?

50 - everything you are going through I seem to be going through too.

blossommy · 22/06/2014 17:27

does hrt actually help with the mental health probs like depression and anxiety - or is it more beneficial for things like hot flushes?

ab987 · 21/06/2014 13:37

50 is there any reason why you won't consider HRT- it will solve all those problems you are having.

50KnockingonabiT · 20/06/2014 14:38

Forgot to say I've put two stone on in the last year and my diet/eating habits are terrible:(

50KnockingonabiT · 20/06/2014 14:36

I think I'm really struggling at the moment

I'm just 50, always had horrendous periods, until the last six months or so when I've only had three, this bit I like:)

Hot flushes, no sweating as such, but feel like I'm burning up and my arms go bright read, the urge to strip off is not good when it happens at work:)

This last few weeks I've had a lot of joint pain, back, hip, knees and ankles.

The worst thing are the moods. I am so bloody miserable. Can't seem to shake this off. Can't see anything to be happy about. It's fair to say my DH ain't to happy about this either:( Have had a couple of episodes of depression in the last ten years, am wondering if this is actually back or if indeed it is the menopause.

I just want to be happy again. Any idea where I go from here?

Thanks

ssd · 18/06/2014 09:12

hormonal migraines are the worst ever Sad

ab987 · 18/06/2014 08:19

Oh hormonal migraines are very very common. You'd probably find the same with HRT regimes, and many women get migraine on the Pill before a bleed for the same reason.
Red wine does sometimes set off migraines, but alcohol itself has a definite link with PMT and peri meno symptoms.

QueenCadbury · 17/06/2014 21:24

Thanks ab. I try to eat relatively healthily and feel so much better for giving up sugar. I keep thinking about giving up wine but don't think I can do it. I've given up diet coke and chocolate, I need to keep one vice Grin. I don't think the migraines are set off by foods as they only occur on the day my period starts so I thnk definitely hormonal.

ab987 · 17/06/2014 14:32

Just an extra post for anyone reading; you don't HAVE to suffer hot flushes! HRT is safe. The scares of 12 years ago have been knocked on the head as flawed. Latest research in Denmark showed that even after 17 years on HRT there was barely any increase in things like breast cancer and heart disease. Don't put up with symptoms when help is out there.

ab987 · 17/06/2014 14:28

Queen

I've answered your other post on the other meno forum here but wondered if you had tried to help your peri symptoms with lifestyle changes?
Migraines (I get them now and then) are often linked to certain foods but more to fluctuations in blood sugar levels in some people; if I miss a meal ( eg lunch) I can almost guarantee a migraine will kick off.

There's also a lot to be said for starting to eat really healthily in the peri phase- so that means cutting out sugar and refined carbs, and loading up with lean protein, good fats, fruit and veg- but not fruit juice as it's the same as concentrated sugar. Caffeine and booze give the same highs as refined sugar so these don't help mood swings either.

Something like yoga or anything where you can reduce stress and switch off might help as well.

QueenCadbury · 16/06/2014 21:47

imigran

QueenCadbury · 16/06/2014 21:45

ssd sumatriptan is the only thing that touches it when it's bad. It's over the counter. The usual paracetamol/codeine/ibuprofen and even mefenamic acid (prescription painkiller) don't help me.

ssd · 16/06/2014 16:52

what migraine drugs do you take queen? I tried everything over the counter and nothing touches it, its awful.

QueenCadbury · 16/06/2014 09:44

I've been having peri menopausal symptoms for at least the past 12 months. I'm 40. The symptoms are..
-erratic periods, sometimes my usual 28 days but sometimes I can be 10 days early. And they go on for days.
-menstrual migraines. To the point that sometimes I have to take migraine drugs and lie in a darkened room or wear sunglasses inside Grin

  • worsening pmt. I become a different person. I throw things, swear and rant. It's hideous
-I've had about 3 hot flushes but not too bothersome thank goodness.
  • burning and itching sensation down below. Feels a bit like thrush but isn't. But it just makes me scratch and scratch.

I've found some relief from the mood swings from giving up sugar so that I don't get highs and lows. I also try and not eat processed carbs but sometimes around my period I get so bloody hungry that I can't help myself!
I've changed my shower gel which has helped a bit with the itching down below.
I've just booked onto a stress and mood management course recommended by my GP.

I'm just hoping that this doesn't go on for years and years. I've had my kids so would happily have my periods stop.

oxfordcomma75 · 14/06/2014 20:48

Me too irish

IrishBloodEnglishHeart · 14/06/2014 20:31

This is such a great thread. My mum died in her 50's before we got a chance to discuss menopause and now I don't know who to ask about the symptoms I am currently experiencing in my mid-40s. Until now anyway!

My biggest annoyance is water retention. My breasts feel so swollen and heavy. All of my bras feel to small but I haven't actually gained any weight. I used to get water retention before my periods and it would go away once the period started. Now they feel heavy all time, my last period finished a week ago and my boobs feel enormous. Is this a common thing in the lead up to menopause?

ssd · 14/06/2014 17:43

does the perimeno cause headaches? am 47, and always been prone to a headache at the end of my period, now its gone balmy and it late this month and head is banging, muggy weather not helping, have taken ibuprofen and paracetamol and nothing is touching it...help!!

blossommy · 14/06/2014 11:22

Similar question to the earlier poster re mental health. Up to the age of 30 and birth of twins I had no mh issues but then had severe pnd.
I've read various things which suggest that I am now more likely to sufferer mh symptoms around menopause.
Would be interested to hear any experiences.
I'm 44 and think I'm in the early stages of perimenopause.

oxfordcomma75 · 12/06/2014 17:32

Great and timely thread. I am 45 and just had the following blood test results fsh 57 and lh 33. My last period was on my 45th birthday almost 2 months ago.
My periods have been random for maybe 5 or 6 years. 2 a month or nothing for 3 months. I than had "change of life " baby. When my periods returned they became 3 monthly and than monthly but lighter for 6 months. Interesting that my menopausal syptoms only occur in the cycles where I don't bleed.
Now not sure if april period will be my last or whether they will return.
Any advice from people who have been through this appreciated.
I am shattered with a toddler to look after.
Thank you.

AliceInSandwichLand · 12/06/2014 14:22

Has anyone tried melatonin for night wakefulness, please? My flushes and joint aches are bearable, but I don't think I've slept through the night since my last period, back in the spring sometime. Am reluctant to go for HRT but would really like some sleep...

Dirtypaws · 11/06/2014 22:06

I have another symptom for you...dry ear wax! Up until a year or two ago I had perfectly normal sticky ear wax. Now it is dry and flaky. Soz for TMI

lazypepper · 06/06/2014 18:25

Thanks for the replies re skin. Fingers crossed mine does the same. Idt rather be wrinkly than suffer spottiness for more years to come.