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MNHQ

Exciting announcement - Mumsnet to run NHS maternity wards

90 replies

JustineMumsnet · 01/04/2014 08:38

We're thrilled to announce that Mumsnet is going to be leading the NHS trial to outsource maternity wards - see the full announcement here. Over the next few weeks we'll be popping up regularly for feedback on how you'd like maternity wards to operate and to hone our plans. The aim is simple - to make the UK maternity wards the envy of the world. Move over Bounty, it's time for #MNHS!

OP posts:
RaRaTheNoisyLion · 01/04/2014 10:30

Can hospital stays be up to 10 days with full use of the spar, gin bar and pool facilities?

RaRaTheNoisyLion · 01/04/2014 10:29

I'd vote for you AtYourCervix!

RaRaTheNoisyLion · 01/04/2014 10:24

Hooray!!!

AtYourCervix · 01/04/2014 10:24

You'll be needing me to head this I think.

I have no intention of ever (ever ever ever) managing anything in the current NHS but this will be right up my street.

Staff meetings held monthly in the gin bar.

tinypumpkin · 01/04/2014 10:18

Are fruit shoots going to be provided for newborns in the delivery room? That and some naice ham would be good.

Beastofburden · 01/04/2014 10:09

Yes! you can submit your choice of baby name and be given a forecast income and educational attainment by Katie Hopkins.

kotinka · 01/04/2014 10:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JugglingFromHereToThere · 01/04/2014 09:59

I just knew there was something missing from my NHS water-birth when I had dd - 15 years ago today Thanks - where was the gin bar?Grin

They obviously need you MNHQ to provide that real insight into what we really want Wine

If only Thanks

tribpot · 01/04/2014 09:58

I would expect that all name choices would have to be approved via the AIBU board? Pedants' Corner might also like to weigh in on matters such as 'Jane is not spelt Geaynnn and you look like an idiot'.

I would set Amsterdam-style coffee shops where the waiting relatives or just general visitors to the hospital could sample the gas and air - for a suitable fee, of course.

rubybricks · 01/04/2014 09:57

GrinGrinGrin

Beastofburden · 01/04/2014 09:56

Coaching for new grannies, so they don't end up featured in AIBU.

SagaNorensLeatherTrousers · 01/04/2014 09:55

Wow, Babylis Big Hair stylers are enough to convince me to start planning for baby #3!

SagaNorensLeatherTrousers · 01/04/2014 09:53
Grin
somuchtosortout · 01/04/2014 09:51

Scrap the vetting. Not sure any of us would pass.

somuchtosortout · 01/04/2014 09:49

Baby catchers could work?

somuchtosortout · 01/04/2014 09:48

I think you missed a trick. It should also provide a relationship and life coaching advice service. You could recruit volunteer mumsnetters to be on duty, though obviously they should pass some sort of crb and vetting procedure.

CalamitouslyWrong · 01/04/2014 09:46

What about 'baby welcomers'?

IDismyname · 01/04/2014 09:41

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

^^ That's a round of applause for you MNHQ!

Brilliant!

CalamitouslyWrong · 01/04/2014 09:40

I'm particularly taken by the idea of renaming of delivery suites.

And why stop there? The term midwife sounds so outdated, especially as it assumes that women = wife. So what if it's derived from Middle English. Cearly it's a term that needs bringing in to the 21st century. Any ideas?

Grin
CbeebiesIsAboutToPop · 01/04/2014 09:38

I also think you should be offering hour labour slots with online checkin for women who wish to go naturally too, it's only fair, and a great way to bring in extra revenue if women go over their allotted time - you can charge them for every 30 minutes.

(I really hope the government aren't reading this!)

CbeebiesIsAboutToPop · 01/04/2014 09:35

The pelvic floor sessions and mumsnet academy classes are good ideas!!

An who hasn't just given birth and thought, I wish I had my bbh with me, I could jut do with adding volume to my roots!!

AntoinetteCosway · 01/04/2014 09:33

I SO wish this were true!

marzipananimal · 01/04/2014 09:25

I love that you used Angela Hernandez!

Terrortree · 01/04/2014 09:24

You'll be deleting your own thread come midday me thinks! Wink

coffeeinbed · 01/04/2014 09:22

What, together with Bounty?