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See all MNHQ comments on this thread

deleted threads again, sorry.

80 replies

grumpygov · 26/04/2013 23:25

I am a bit miffed that a thread was deleted today 'for the OPs privacy' when it was blatantly because the OP got a bit of (pretty reasonable and mostly civil) stick and didn't like it. They hadn't given a load of identifiable details, they were just having a huff.

It really spoils it when whole threads disappear Sad grumblegrumble

OP posts:
HelenMumsnet · 27/04/2013 10:26

@BalloonSlayer

But there was also another one, yesterday, in Relationships (the baby support one was in Legal).

The one I am talking about is the one with the gigantic paragraphs that were all one sentence, where the OP was cheating on her DP. All the replies were along the lines of "they are both twats, get rid of them both and start again" and then she started saying "I'm going to get this thread deleted."

The message reads "This thread has been deleted at the OP's request. (We don't normally delete whole threads but we will do so when it is to protect a poster's privacy.)"

Saying "we don't normally delete whole threads" is a tad disingenuous when you do it twice in one day.

Especially when it was fairly clear she just wasn't getting the answers she wanted.

Well I'm not sure about this one, I'm afraid - I'll have to go and take a look at our logs.

But think it's worth saying there are two issues here and they're easily muddled up.

Issue 1: MNHQ deleting threads at OP's request.

Issue 2: MNHQ cocking up and selecting the wrong deletion message when deleting a thread.

HelenMumsnet · 27/04/2013 10:24

@TheDoctrineOfSnatch

There is sometimes a "thread deleted because it turned into a bunfight" message which seems handy.

Indeed. Smile

BalloonSlayer · 27/04/2013 10:23

But there was also another one, yesterday, in Relationships (the baby support one was in Legal).

The one I am talking about is the one with the gigantic paragraphs that were all one sentence, where the OP was cheating on her DP. All the replies were along the lines of "they are both twats, get rid of them both and start again" and then she started saying "I'm going to get this thread deleted."

The message reads "This thread has been deleted at the OP's request. (We don't normally delete whole threads but we will do so when it is to protect a poster's privacy.)"

Saying "we don't normally delete whole threads" is a tad disingenuous when you do it twice in one day.

Especially when it was fairly clear she just wasn't getting the answers she wanted.

HelenMumsnet · 27/04/2013 10:23

@Snazzynewyear

Threads by Certain Posters always get left to stand, so it does depend on who you are.

We really don't think that is true, Snazzynewyear.

We don't have any "special" posters or "golden children". We really would be cutting off our nose to spite our face if that was our policy.

Snazzynewyear · 27/04/2013 10:20

Or even, get left to stand when distressing others but then deleted when MNHQ decide thread is being too nasty to golden child OP.

need more coffee, my powers of expression are crap today

TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 27/04/2013 10:18

There is sometimes a "thread deleted because it turned into a bunfight" message which seems handy.

Snazzynewyear · 27/04/2013 10:18

To clarify, I mean when others have asked for their deletion on the grounds of causing distress.

Snazzynewyear · 27/04/2013 10:17

Threads by Certain Posters always get left to stand, so it does depend on who you are.

Freddiemisagreatshag · 27/04/2013 10:11

Have reported again Helen. If you could take a look and come back to me on it I really would be very grateful. Thank you.

HelenMumsnet · 27/04/2013 10:09

@JugglingFromHereToThere

I think, on balance, that you should probably err more on the side of benefit of the doubt Helen - and even say that you will consider requests for deletion by the OP in exceptional circumstances (or summat)

That's exactly what we've been saying here, isn't it?

JugglingFromHereToThere · 27/04/2013 10:08

I think, on balance, that you should probably err more on the side of benefit of the doubt Helen - and even say that you will consider requests for deletion by the OP in exceptional circumstances (or summat)

HelenMumsnet · 27/04/2013 10:06

@Freddiemisagreatshag

Helen, I can see your point. But can you also see how it leads to inconsistencies and can leave some posters (like me on the thread of mine I'm referring to) feeling quite hurt? There was a comment made on that thread that was still standing, the last time I looked, and it STILL comes into my head at odd moments and makes me cry.

Sorry - not sure which thread you mean

But do please report that post to us and we'd be happy to take another look.

Freddiemisagreatshag · 27/04/2013 10:06

Fair enough Helen.

ItsYoniYappy · 27/04/2013 10:05

Someone did ask:

Is your name [insert possible OPs name]?

Maybe it was that. Although I think the thread would have stayed if everyone agreed

HelenMumsnet · 27/04/2013 10:05

@Freddiemisagreatshag

And another thing - sort of on the subject.

If you don't post on a thread, but do report it because you think it's odd/trolly or whatever -sometimes you get an email that says "we are looking into it" but you never hear back what the looking into it found.

And if you've not posted or put it in watching then you never know if you were totally wrong

Other times you do get "we have no reason to believe the poster is anything but genuine so we are going to let this one stand" (wording might be off but that's the gist)

Freddie, "we are looking into it" means just that: we're looking into it. It can take some time to establish whether someone is trolling or not. We think it's important to let you know that we have received your report, though - so you don't think we're just ignoring your concerns.

As for not mailing back to tell you exactly what we've found out: we hope you can understand why we tend not to do that.

First of all, if it is a troll, we'd rather be banning 'em and sorting the whole mess out - and reporters who are on the thread can usually tell by the thread deletion (and message) what is going on.

If the situation is unclear - as it often the case, at least to being with - there is nothing to be gained, and probably an awful lot to lose, by mailing everyone who reported and saying, "Ooh, yes, bit dodgy, does sound like a troll, doesn't it?" If that person is, in fact, genuine, she's now been publicly (and unfairly) tarred with the brush of suspicion.

Our standpoint is, and always has been, to give benefit of the doubt until we know otherwise.

Freddiemisagreatshag · 27/04/2013 10:01

Helen, I can see your point. But can you also see how it leads to inconsistencies and can leave some posters (like me on the thread of mine I'm referring to) feeling quite hurt? There was a comment made on that thread that was still standing, the last time I looked, and it STILL comes into my head at odd moments and makes me cry.

MoaningMingeWhingesAgain · 27/04/2013 10:00

Harrumph.

Well I don't like what you said so I am going to get this thread deleted. So ner not really

HelenMumsnet · 27/04/2013 09:57

@Freddiemisagreatshag

I agree with Moaning

Plus, what's the difference between her emailing "in some distress" and me emailing "in some distress".

If I'd fibbed and said someone involved had seen my thread, would it have been deleted?

Well, I'm afraid you're probably going to have to trust our judgement on this.

We tend to be pretty good at distinguishing fact from fiction

Freddiemisagreatshag · 27/04/2013 09:52

I agree with Moaning

Plus, what's the difference between her emailing "in some distress" and me emailing "in some distress".

If I'd fibbed and said someone involved had seen my thread, would it have been deleted?

ssd · 27/04/2013 09:52

you tell em helen

MoaningMingeWhingesAgain · 27/04/2013 09:51

(I am the OP of this thread and not being a sockpuppet)

Her replies did not appear to tie in with her claim that someone had recognised the thread. At all. I suspect a rather large fib.

I should be a barrister you know.

HelenMumsnet · 27/04/2013 09:48

Hello.

And sorry you all feel so cross about this. It does sound as though we selected the wrong deletion message in this case - and we do apologise for that.

We should have written a special "custom" deletion message instead.

From what I can see, the OP of the thread in question mailed us in some distress (and many many times) saying one of the people she was posting about had seen the thread, realised it was about them and was issuing threats in all directions.

In that kind of situation, we do tend to consider thread deletion (as you know, we don't routinely delete threads on request).

But we were well aware that the OP may have been relieved to see the thread go for other reasons, too. And, in these cases, we do make it pretty clear, even if we delete (because of her RL situation) on this occasion, it's worth knowing for future ref that we don't delete because you've got responses you don't like.

We also always ask OPs to go back on the thread and thank people for their responses and explain, as best they can, why they've asked for deletion. It's a shame the OP didn't do that on this occasion.

Freddiemisagreatshag · 27/04/2013 09:38

If HQ even were up front and said threads would be deleted at the op's request. But they say that they won't be and then do so. It's inconsistent

Freddiemisagreatshag · 27/04/2013 09:37

I totally agree. It was smug smuggery. And HQ bought into it.

Unfair. And against what others have been told. That hq don't usually delete at a posters request.

JugglingFromHereToThere · 27/04/2013 09:36

But if an OP is getting really upset by responses - enough to request a thread deletion - don't you think it's right that HQ at least considers doing so ?
I wasn't happy with how my one went the other day (in AIBU - basically about getting the MMR for my teens in light of measles outbreak) - but as a few people posted more supportively it was OK. It can be a bit full on I imagine if you feel the whole world is against you !
Perhaps there should be an "After consideration thread has been deleted at OP's request" How's that ?