Vipers' nest? Come counter our hissy rep with your stories of Mumsnet Niceness

Oh - and I only half remembered the name of the site and ended up joining netmums :o

Thinking back, I think the first I'd ever heard of MN was from a leaflet I got when I had my MC. This was almost 8 years ago.

I think we come together here and do things we thought we may never had done before. I was once ready to run down the road at 11pm here in North London,braless, clutching piriton for a member's friend who was having a bad reaction to her chemo. Turned out I didn't need to,as I believe the lady had a queue outside her door of MNetters with medicine!

Someone once sent me some unwanted clothing on the "I have but don't need...." thread. When I received the parcel...she had put in a yummy bar of chocolate as well, and had written a smiley face on the packet.

Says it all really

OMG - Gwendoline - trifle for Steve. Bittersweet memories.

What a lovely idea MNHQ

I've been involved in lots of loveliness on here; several Christmas campaigns (as donor and also, once, as recipient which blew me away completely); putting a rescue package together for one of our PN group with an ill DD; MN Woolly hugs, both as crafter and recipient of wool when I was skint; as the recipient of a lovely box of goodies from my MN mates, when I was the first of my original AN thread to sprog again far too soon; Lulumama taking the time to talk to me on the phone about my options regarding VBAC and elective CS and making a CS personal when I was pregnant with DD; the support on here giving me the strength to actually attempt and manage a VBA2C with DS2; the support in general and the fact that complete strangers will go the extra mile to help people in their hour of need.

Journos should realise that AIBU (which is what I assume gets us the "viper" tag) is only a teeny tiny part of MN!

I have a photo of dd1, now 5, when she was about 5 months. She is pretending to eat a trifle for OJ's DH. We all ate trifles for Steve that day. I might have eaten several

And yy to the miscarriage board and all the support I was given when I was sent home to wait for an ERPC with a one sided leaflet and almost zero information.

I think it is all fine- they just need to reformat MumsNet Talk so that you have to search for topics and it is obvious which are for support and which are for debate. Some are safe, bereavement for example isn't going to get people wandering in being nasty but something like SN isn't safe. I never go onto the one about dogs because I don't have a dog but it came to my attention that you can have real bunfights in there! I was amazed!

I love MN.

The support and kindness here are fab. And the humour!

We are ridiculous sometimes (museum of toddler art, anyone?)! but we are sublime.

exotic - I know that all too well, and as you say, that is the sad part of it. I have lurked here for years (as some of my list may show ) and that is such a small part of the whole place.

This thread started today- I did a search and they have posted today, but not on here- that isn't to say they won't.

Exotic - how do you know for sure that one or more on your list haven't already posted though?

I have had fantastic support when pregnant after a miscarriage, when DS3 wasn't gaining weight and I was coming under pressure from HCPs to stop breastfeeding (thank you TikTok among others), and when DH was diagnosed with cancer and my MIL was being even more difficult than usual I remember a couple of mumsnetters checking up on how things were going weeks and months later.

Although it isn't on the same scale, I have read a couple of amazing books that I only picked up as a result of threads on here and learned a lot about how different (and difficult) many people's lives are which I hope has made me less judgemental.

But that one area is the one that is taken to represent MN, aGlassHalfEmpty- and that is the sad part of it.

I have given MNHQ my views. They haven't replied as yet. I know they don't want censorship, and I agree with them there, but they do get it wrong sometimes and end up making mistakes - mainly because they can't really work out who is a troll and who isn't.

A few that haven't been mentioned that come to mind. The support for OnlyJoking as she lost her dh, the support over the past 9 months for Lou, since the chunt left her (and all the cards and gifts being sent for her ds), the support Starsandstripes (?) got when posting asking if SWBU asking her dh to pick up a loaf of bread and some milk on the way home from work - and the subsequent support as she left him and started afresh. And TwoTeachers (?) with the shopkeeper in Derbyshire, SleepingwiththeEnemy, and so many hundreds of others besides.

Others mentioned above include the support for TrinityRhino, GentleOtter, CupOfTea.

The woolly hugs, the secret santas. The stately homes threads. On a sillier note, the support for Shiny and the penguin set-up.

But more than that. The support for the hundreds of lurkers (self included) who never or rarely post, but who gain so much from the knowledge and wisdom that is Mumsnet.

The fact, as others have pointed out, that no matter who posts, no matter what the situation is (yoni's excepted ), somebody has experience, someone has advice, and help will be given, whether it is your 1st post, or 10,001st post.

There is only one area which seems to fit the criteria of a nest of vipers, and I often have to sit on my hands reading stuff in there because people do come in for such a mauling so often. But the one area is extremely unrepresentative of Mumsnet as a whole.

The wonderfully generous ladies on the breast cancer thread who helped through one of the most terrifying periods of my life.

PS I am not a fat, non vacc, alternative hippy though. I am just a faceless name on the Internet.

Mmm, the hooligans can put those wanting to make their point off joining in the debate though...

MistyB has a point. I know to keep off vaccines, last time it was so bad that some kind people pmed me to support.
There are certain things I know to keep off- it may only be strangers on the Internet but my skin isn't hard enough for some subjects.

But as far as the debates then often there are antagonists on 'both' sides of the coin, kinda like hooligans at football matches, there is always someone seeking out a bunfight.

Just out of interest I did a search of what I would call some of the more abrasive posters and none of them have posted on here yet. I am convinced that MN is serving 2 sorts , those who want support,and to be supporting,and those who want debate (some of it 'robust' ). Some crosses over and both are equally valid. However I am convinced it would be better to separate the two in a more marked way and it would cause less upset - especially to the unwary. It would also ensure that journalists didn't immediately tap into the parts they could find fault with. Personally I enjoy the lively debate, even though it gets heated. I am fascinated by the wide range of views.

Lone voice in the wind, but it's not always sweetness and light is it.....

God forbid you question vaccines, think alternative therapies might have their place or are fat on style and beauty.....