Parenting: Cameron's childhood adviser says we're all getting it wrong. Is she right?

Ha ! Just noticed Claire said (talking about IT within her comments on parenting) "Most parents are too busy, don't know the words ..."

Well, here's a handy new word for you Mrs Perry, to help you in your new role (1 month in I gather) as the prime-minister's adviser on childhood .... drum roll please ^ PLAY ...... thank-you

Loving all of this talk about the value and crucial role of play in children's (and our) lives.

Yes, let's have Claire on and tell her where we see the priorities for improving children's experience of childhood !

i agree with a lot of what she has said.
I have a 12 and 17 year old (boys) and I know where they are, who they are with and what they are doing, we have always enrolled them in clubs and I have full access to their internet and phones, DS2 has a face book account to keep in touch with friends from primary school but does not know the password and so he can only log on when I do it for him and both boys know everything they do I see,

morethan, It would be interesting if Claire Perry could give us a view on when she thinks it's ok to let children play out (what age, what circumstances) without some kind of adult monitoring.

Sorry forgot to add the most important thing about play. Yes Linerunner
Play, gives us our roles through recreating our play from childhood. It is recreational, uses up spare time in order to recall and recreate in future life.

Hark at me!

LineRunner.

My degree was Leisure and Tourism and Play was just one unit. I loved the philosophy so much, I couldn't resist. Took ages to find an angle though.

I think dc still play as imo its inerrant, but the boundaries have changed and some of the freedom has gone now. Our kids are cocooned but mainly due to parental fears rather than technology or organised activities.

Yes play is about becoming human, experiencing life through play is also what adults subcontiously aspire too as well. We are never too old to play. Vertigo is the thrill that a person seeks and gets from being out of control and is apparent through fairground rollercoasters through to running round a mop making yourself dizzy. Everyone should have the freedom to play, but especially kids.

p.s. morethan I wish I had done a dissertation like yours!

morethanpotatoprints

Play is about becoming human, is it not? And then growing into roles; thus hugely important to the type of society we want our children to be socialised into making.

LineRunner.

I totally agree with your point about play and imagination. Its the right of the child to have freedom to play, its right up there with right to education, shelter and food.
However, I don't think dc need to experience boredom for this. I think that they feel the need to play and do so not because they are bored but as a conscious deliberate activity.
Boredom, is surely the opposite and lacking imagination.
I did my dissertation on the changes to children's play from the 1970's, it wasn't brilliant research or anything, but I learnt a lot and really enjoyed it.

iclaudius, are you the adviser's adviser?

iclaudius.

My older 2 were 16, they weren't always aware I knew what they were doing though.
Still now at 21 and 18 I know what they are up to as one will tell me the others status on fb .
Personally, I had the no electronics in bedrooms because I believe it doesn't aid sleep foremost but also that so much can go wrong even at 16+ that I was glad I'd made the ruling when they were younger.

Iclaudius

When the child's imagination 'starts' working is called PLAY.

morethanpotato -what age do you suggest they no longer need monitoring on the internet?

I don't think theres anything wrong with lots of activities if they are chosen by the dc. Its not like many kids play out these days anyway.
Allowing them hobbies and interests is surely good for character building and they are meeting other dcs who share a common interest, from other schools and communities.

As for being safe on the internet, parents aren't stupid, they monitor their dc from an early age until they are positive they can be trusted or are mature enough not to need monitoring.

I have yet to meet a dc that has many activities and spends hours on technological gadgets and games. There aren't enough hours. Prior to 16 I never let anything electronic into bedrooms at night anyway. Homework was done downstairs so no problem.

I also don't think this advisor has kids, its not rocket science.

juggling i do however think that the time in which to be 'bored' can also be the time in whih the childs imagination starts working overtime.

Is the "tons of activities" a middle class thing? We couldnt afford to do this anyway, some of DS friends have 1, if not 2 activities a night - it must be exhausting.

Facebooks, all DS1s notifications come in via me

internet - he KNOWS I check the history after a friend looked at porn - he got a stern grilling from me and I informed their parents so he wont be doing that again.

The most difficult thing is the xbox as live doesnt really seem to be set up to be "safe" it becomes very labour intensive if its set to "child" - they dont make friends with anyone they dont know in real life but pretty much all of their friends do. DS 1 was so concerned about one person one of DS2's friends had befriended that he got me to have a word with his parent.

Does this "advisor" have children? Im assuming the Nanny has been passed these instructions.

Yes, I too would like to see a webchat on MN with Claire Perry. If she is the PM's adviser on childhood, I would like the chance to ask about her credentials and the evidence base on which she is basing her policy statements.

The social construction of childhood is not 'owned' by one policy adviser.

But some political figures can make huge contributions in areas of social policy.

If Perry wants to be one of those, she needs to have good ideas, a very deep social conscience based on witnessing real life crap and helping those involved, and an ability to debate with lots of people, in lots of ways, and not just to talk over people on Question Time.

Yes, Linerunner. In fact, most obviously, the childcare ratios thing is all about increasing structure to reduce adult labour (staff hours, input) in taking care of children. A lack of structure is in fact very labour intensive and much more demanding of individuals and society in very subtle ways. There is no more room for any more demands on anyone because everyone is stretched to the limit with economic imperatives - exactly the sort of imperatives that Truss wants to intensify

Absolutely, Juggling.

MNHQ, can we get Perry in for a webchat? Can we? Can we please? Can we pleeeeeeeeeaaaaassssseeee? Gowaaaan, I'll be yer best friend, I'll invite you to my birthday party and everyfink. It'd be frikkin amazing.

I really think the missing word from her argument was play - children need time to play. But play is woefully un-appreciated and misunderstood in this country even for young children, and even by many educationalists and experts. So, shouldn't be surprised really that it gets no mention from the prime-minister's adviser on childhood.

As she stumbles around in the dark looking for the right word the best she could come up with is "they need time to be bored"

I see an argument that parents need to be doing lots of structured activities with their children, or for their childcarers to do so, emanating from the State and indeed being written into statute - childminders having to follow an early years curriculum, childen's centres (Sure Start) offering certain structred activities from birth, etc etc.

Structured activities are also expected to be offered in Extended School environments 8am-6pm for all children.

But Tory Claire seems to have suggested that taking advantage of such structured activities may be ... wrong?

I'd love her to come and show me the 'correct way'. On film, on camera.

I don't see the argument that we 'can't do right' I do however see a generation of teens and up and coming teens who may be increasingly hard work to over stretched parents...
Claire Perry is an advisor - put there to help. She says it as she sees it not to beat us with a sharp stick .

We don't need to demonise her

I agree with Claire Perry.

Claire Perry if you are reading this, shall we do a life swap for, say, just a week?